Nosy Neighbor

Nosy Neighbor

liilii080 liilii080
I have a neighbor who can't mind her business and loves asking me what the packages on my door step are (toys or not.) I was hoping you all might have some good responses I can give her because nothing I say seems to get her to back off. I appreciate the ideas in advance!
01/08/2011
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Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
I have a neighbor who can't mind her business and loves asking me what the packages on my door step are (toys or not.) I was hoping you all might have some good responses I can give her because nothing I say seems to get her to back off. I ...
You could use the response that Dear Abby suggests for nosy questions. The next time she asks, say "What did you say?" She'll repeat the question. Then you say "That's what I thought you said."
01/08/2011
ToyGeek ToyGeek
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
You could use the response that Dear Abby suggests for nosy questions. The next time she asks, say "What did you say?" She'll repeat the question. Then you say "That's what I thought you said."
Oh, that is excellent! Way better than my strategy of elaborate and bizarre lies.
01/08/2011
Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
I would tell her you are receiving body parts from inmates at your local prison. She probably wont believe you but it might freak her out enough to stop asking. Fetuses might also work.
01/08/2011
Envy Envy
Say it's materials and things you're ordering to prepare for when zombies invade.
01/08/2011
ToyGeek ToyGeek
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
Say it's materials and things you're ordering to prepare for when zombies invade.
Oh, I approve of this -- explaining detailed and elaborate conspiracy theories, the more implausible the better, keep people from ever asking you anything again.
01/08/2011
PassionQT PassionQT
She's probably just trying to make small talk, but your mail is none of her business. One of the above replies will hopefully get her to be quiet about it in the future.
01/08/2011
B8trDude B8trDude
Tell her it's your latest supply of nosy neighbor repellent.
01/08/2011
SexyTabby SexyTabby
I had the same problem with my neighbor (who happens to be my brother and sister in law). I usually say it's a new game for he kids or something along that line since I order a lot online but the last one I told her it was a vibrator and she was startled. I figure the truth might shock her outta being so damn nosy Can't wait til my next order comes to see if it worked lol
01/08/2011
Jobthingy Jobthingy
HA! These are awesome replies. Now you have to choose one and see if it works.

I would tell her it is your new 20 inch long dildo and see if that scares her quiet. little does she know it could be just that LOL
01/08/2011
deletedacct deletedacct
That's so rude! Goth's comment is the best :o) She'll stop asking if you say that.
01/08/2011
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by SexyTabby
I had the same problem with my neighbor (who happens to be my brother and sister in law). I usually say it's a new game for he kids or something along that line since I order a lot online but the last one I told her it was a vibrator and she was ...
See I would launch into an elaborate explanation of exactly what I do here at EF and what I generally order. I would explain that sometimes EF sends some rather bizarre toys and tell her all about the latest glass butt plug. I would then offer her a coupon and a guided tour if she wants to just step inside my office....this always works and sometimes results in a new customer or reviewer for EF.
Then again I have no shame and LOVE toying with people so half the time they dunno if I am being serious.
01/08/2011
cherryredhead88 cherryredhead88
LOL There was another thread around here somewhere about carrying toys across campus, one of the responses was to tell them jokingly that there were sex toys in that case... lol. They could just laugh and shrug it off, but that might make them more curious. I would tell them some crazy conspiracy theory as well... lol
01/08/2011
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Tell her you are building a time traveling device and just received a Flux Capacitor so now you can travel to the past and pick a different house to live in.
01/08/2011
Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Tell her you are building a time traveling device and just received a Flux Capacitor so now you can travel to the past and pick a different house to live in.
Oh damn! If you actually have a flux capacitor send it my way, my Delorean is in desperate need. I'm almost out of Uranium too... how in the hell am I going to save future me from becoming a lesbian sexploitation film star?
01/08/2011
Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
Wait did I say save me from doing it? I meant ensure that I go through with it.
01/08/2011
kinky girlfriend kinky girlfriend
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
I have a neighbor who can't mind her business and loves asking me what the packages on my door step are (toys or not.) I was hoping you all might have some good responses I can give her because nothing I say seems to get her to back off. I ...
tell her its a giant vibrator or maybe just say it's sexual lol
01/08/2011
Chilipepper Chilipepper
Quote:
Originally posted by Emma (Girl With Fire)
Oh damn! If you actually have a flux capacitor send it my way, my Delorean is in desperate need. I'm almost out of Uranium too... how in the hell am I going to save future me from becoming a lesbian sexploitation film star?
Get a Mr. Fusion. ^_~
01/08/2011
Airekah Airekah
Just tell her it is none of her business, or if it is from Eden, tell her what it really is and maybe she will stop asking..
01/08/2011
SexyTabby SexyTabby
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
See I would launch into an elaborate explanation of exactly what I do here at EF and what I generally order. I would explain that sometimes EF sends some rather bizarre toys and tell her all about the latest glass butt plug. I would then offer her a ...
Once before my son asked if he could go on the computer while the two of them were at my house and I told him no I had left things open on the computer he'd have to wait. He rolls his eyes and says "more adult toys" I thought the two of them would die my only comment was "well I married your brother so...yeah I enjoy my toys!" lol they never have mentioned that again so I'm thinking just telling her it was a vibrator will work - if not I may have to try a coupon that'd be funny. She's really the prude type not sure how she'd handle finding out I reviewed toys
01/08/2011
clp clp
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
You could use the response that Dear Abby suggests for nosy questions. The next time she asks, say "What did you say?" She'll repeat the question. Then you say "That's what I thought you said."
I'm with this. She's probably just being friendly and unaware of how rude she is (or thinks you are on good enough terms to be asking).

When I am asked, I just say 'you don't want to know' and repeat until they give up.
01/08/2011
liilii080 liilii080
I knew you guys wouldn't disappoint! It sounds like telling her the truth is the consensus so I might just have to introduce her to Lelo and crotchless panties. There won't be a desperate housewife for miles when I get done.
01/08/2011
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
I knew you guys wouldn't disappoint! It sounds like telling her the truth is the consensus so I might just have to introduce her to Lelo and crotchless panties. There won't be a desperate housewife for miles when I get done.
OMG. I love everyone else's responses, but your response and attitude is just perfect!
01/08/2011
Mr. & Mrs. Peg Mr. & Mrs. Peg
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Tell her you are building a time traveling device and just received a Flux Capacitor so now you can travel to the past and pick a different house to live in.
This kills me!! This is a riot.

The guy at my mailbox store alwasy hands me my package and says..."Have a great night!" Not in the standard way, but always in the nudge, nudge, wink, wink way. My general response: "Oh I will!"
01/08/2011
Sweet-Justice Sweet-Justice
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
You could use the response that Dear Abby suggests for nosy questions. The next time she asks, say "What did you say?" She'll repeat the question. Then you say "That's what I thought you said."
Thats brilliant XD Hopefully she'll get the point and stop being a busy body ><
01/08/2011
Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
I knew you guys wouldn't disappoint! It sounds like telling her the truth is the consensus so I might just have to introduce her to Lelo and crotchless panties. There won't be a desperate housewife for miles when I get done.
True, maybe she's curious and your neighbor will end up being a contributor here and getting hooked on the community!
01/08/2011
ToyGeek ToyGeek
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Tell her you are building a time traveling device and just received a Flux Capacitor so now you can travel to the past and pick a different house to live in.
One flux capacitor, as requested:

link
01/08/2011
ToyGeek ToyGeek
Quote:
Originally posted by clp
I'm with this. She's probably just being friendly and unaware of how rude she is (or thinks you are on good enough terms to be asking).

When I am asked, I just say 'you don't want to know' and repeat until they give up.
There's that. Or, "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you." Always a classic.
01/08/2011
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGeek
One flux capacitor, as requested:

link
Damn, for $250 I want a real one!
01/08/2011
Alicia Alicia
I'd do the same thing I do for my kids when they ask nosy questions. I give them the most generic answer possible.

Them: "What's in there?"
Me: "Stuff"
Them: "what kind of stuff?"
Me: "My stuff"

Them: "What's for dinner?"
Me: "Food"
Them: "What kind of food?"
Me: "Food that you're going to eat"

Them: "When can we......"
Me: "Later"
Them: "When's later?"
Me: "Not now.."


It can basically be used in any situation and the more clarifying questions they ask you just continue to give generic answers until they get the hint. I don't see any reason to make up what's in there for a neighbor, or give them the justification of an answer because it's none of their business and if you continue to give them answers they will continue to ask.
01/08/2011
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