Curious: Do you find it hard to orgasm without a vibrator?

Curious: Do you find it hard to orgasm without a vibrator?

FAM4LIFE FAM4LIFE
I've only tried vibrating toys a few times. I'm mainly hesitent to incorporate one into my toy collection because I fear it will be harder for me to orgasm without it once I start using it. So I figured I would ask all you vibrator fans.. Do you find it hard to orgasm without a vibrator?
06/05/2010
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Quote:
Originally posted by FAM4LIFE
I've only tried vibrating toys a few times. I'm mainly hesitent to incorporate one into my toy collection because I fear it will be harder for me to orgasm without it once I start using it. So I figured I would ask all you vibrator fans.. Do ...
i have never orgasmed without a vibrator , so i dont think its the vibrator's fault.
06/05/2010
Ciao. Ciao.
Everything that I've ever read on the subject says that using a vibrator has no effect on your natural ability to orgasm with or without assistance. It's understandable that you might worry about it, since it's a common misconception about toys, but as far as I know you can buzz away without any worries!

(I can't speak directly from personal experience, though, since I have boy parts down there)
06/05/2010
FAM4LIFE FAM4LIFE
Thanks,
I orgasm pretty easily so I'm not too worried. I figure if I mix it up I wont become "dependent." In the past I've gotten really into anal and have had trouble orgasming without anal stimulation, but I took a break and it seemed to work. Maybe I'm just prone to falling into patterns.
Thanks again for the input.
06/05/2010
BoomersGirl BoomersGirl
I find it nearly impossible to orgasm without using some sort of vibrator - even a vibrating cock ring, although that's a bit harder than one I have complete control of. I used to be afraid that using one would mean I'd never have an orgasm without one, but now I'm just happy I can have them WITH my hubby, even if it means helping it along. It's brought us closer together and heled us both to open up to each other sexually. And brought the fun of TOYS into our bedroom!
06/05/2010
Kynky Kytty Kynky Kytty
The only time when I find that it's harder to reach an orgasm manually is when I've just given me more than one orgasm with a strong vibe (previous 10 min), and that my clit feels a little numb from the vibrations. In any other time, I'm fine and it's all good.
06/06/2010
Alicia Alicia
I find it hard to only if some time earlier that day (normally within the last few hours) I've used a vibe with strong vibrations directly on my clit and usually only if I've had a few orgasms from it that way. At that point I'm so overstimulated from the vibe that if I'm going to have one later while having sex I need to use a vibe or something again then. But if I use it a different day or just once earlier in a day and then wait a while I've been fine. I do find that I get "addicted" in a way to the strong intense vibrations though and so I like to incorporate them into sex time too. My husband enjoys the intense orgasms that they give me anyway so it's never been a problem for us.
06/06/2010
Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
It usually takes me a little longer to "get there" without a vibe, but since I first learned to masturbate without the aid of any vibrating devices, I can still manage if my favorite vibe is MIA or out of batteries.
06/06/2010
FAM4LIFE FAM4LIFE
Thank you everyone for the info! I was thinking I might try a vibrating cock ring so that we can simultaneously enjoy the toy. This is all very helpful!
06/06/2010
Fun Lover Fun Lover
I have done it both ways. Doing it with or without usually produces different feeling types of orgasms. If you find the correct vibe it feels wonderful. But thier is nothing like the real thing (a nice sized cock) not even a vibe can take its place.
06/06/2010
Jill Ingoff Jill Ingoff
I went through a period of time where I couldn't orgasm without a vibe so I stopped using them for a while and everything went back to normal
06/07/2010
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Nope, not at all. If I want to, I can finish in less than 30 seconds. I can finish from just nipple play too or even just pressure. The things that make it harder are stress.
06/07/2010
Annemarie Annemarie
No, actually, I don't find it difficult to orgasm without a vibrator. I still use my/my S.O.'s fingers all the time (sometimes even without toys at all).
06/07/2010
Liz2 Liz2
I find a vibe gives me more of an intense orgasm but I don't think vibes have desensitized my clit. Mine or my b/f's fingers do very well.
A vibe does get me there faster but many times during solo play I use a vibe, a dil and my fingers....
06/08/2010
SweetestAngelGoneBad SweetestAngelGoneBad
Quote:
Originally posted by FAM4LIFE
I've only tried vibrating toys a few times. I'm mainly hesitent to incorporate one into my toy collection because I fear it will be harder for me to orgasm without it once I start using it. So I figured I would ask all you vibrator fans.. Do ...
Sometimes yes sometimes no. really depends on the mood im in.. but a vibrator always makes it better..
06/12/2010
Kim! Kim!
I orgasm pretty easily no matter what but I do find that often my orgasms are far more intense if I use a vibrator.
06/18/2010
Naughty Student Naughty Student
It is not always easy for me to orgasm whether I am using a vibrator or not. It is not necessarily harder without the vibrator but when I am in control of my stimulation while I masturbate it is quite easier for me to orgasm then compared to during sex. When I masturbate I always orgasm when I have sex I don't always orgasm.

Vibrators havent desensitized me, if anything they help me learn new things about my sexuality which I can then share with my partner.


My orgasms during sex without use of vibrators are far more intense then the ones I get solely from clitoral stimulation with a vibrator. So one orgasm from sex might be equivalent to 2-3 regular orgasms when I masturbate. Thats why when I masturbate I must have atleast 3 orgasms and keep on going until I am tired.
06/19/2010
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
"Vibrators havent desensitized me, if anything they help me learn new things about my sexuality which I can then share with my partner. "

Well said, I second this.
06/19/2010
SexyySarah SexyySarah
Honestly I only ever used other means of orgasming, like shower head or some type of vibrator. And it was always difficult to orgasm. But now that I'm older it's easier for me to do it on my own. Especially if I'm excited!! My hubby also taught me a thing or two! LOL So, no not anymore.
07/08/2010
Heather Heather
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
"Vibrators havent desensitized me, if anything they help me learn new things about my sexuality which I can then share with my partner. "

Well said, I second this.
Third! Before I used a vibe I wasn't getting as much from my orgasms or as often. I find now even without a vibe I orgasm more often and stronger.
07/09/2010
bishoujo bishoujo
I'm not worried either. I can orgasm real easily vaginally. And using a vibrator hasn't decreased anythimg for me either.
07/09/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
When I got into peri-menopause strongly my once hair trigger orgasm went into hiding. I went through months of serious depression and anxiety and once when 10 days without an orgasm! I was ready to get up into a clock tower with an automatic weapon, I was SO frustrated.

My Man bought my first sex toy because he saw it was taking me longer, so I am assuming the difficulty in orgasm came before the sex toys being used regularly.

At first we tried to make sure we were doing "skin only" (sans toys) sex at least every few times, because I was worried about becoming dependent. But, then my ability to come became so difficult and I was depressed and in tears every time we'd have sex and I didn't come, that I just said, "Fuck it." and brought out the Wahl we use it every time now, when I need to come, for the last few minutes before I come, and often use an internal vibe or dildo in addition.

It made me feel a LOT better when I saw that Nina Hartley has the EXACT same situation. She has to use the Hitachi magic wand for the last few minutes before she comes, and her "Tuesdays with Nina" show about this subject, plus her book really helped me feel "OK" about NEEDING the toys. link

I don't know what I would do without them, probably be one of those women who would just get so freakn' frustrated, it would impact my relationship, so I am so glad we were open enough to start using toys. I know a number of women my age who have given up on sex (is that SAD as can be?) and I am so glad to be as happy and horny as usual, even more so, as the years go by.

So, I doubt the use of toys caused the orgasm issue, mine is pretty well documented to be hormonal (with tests from my doctor and everything and still the guy won't give me Testosterone, which I think will help) and the toys are such a good tool to keep our sex life working, functional and even increasing.

I keep hoping that my once "premature orgasm" situation will return, along with keeping my mulit ability. One can hope! (I actually used to STOP my lover from doing stuff and make him "do something else" because I would come so quickly after the first few seconds of stimulation, and back then I used to only have one orgasm and then I'd lose interest, SO unlike the more difficult to have the first one, but having many more with no issue after that, and NEVER losing interest even after hours of sex play we have now. )
07/10/2010
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
When I got into peri-menopause strongly my once hair trigger orgasm went into hiding. I went through months of serious depression and anxiety and once when 10 days without an orgasm! I was ready to get up into a clock tower with an automatic weapon, ...
P'Gell - you may want to look up Body Logic link.

They did a thorough hormonal analysis on both my wife and I. She is also peri-menopausal and it turned out her sensitive breasts and PMS issues were related to estrogen dominance - which was caused by a lack of progesterone. Once she got the cream - she uses it 25 days per month ALL of her symptoms were resolved! She did not have a low testosterone level or they would have prescribed that treatment.

In fact I was diagnosed with low testosterone (when I was 54). It was in the low portion of normal - most traditional docs just tell you to live with it. Body Logic prescribed a bio-identical testosterone cream that I use daily. I am now in the middle of the normal range and a ton of my problems were resolved as well. I'm about to turn 56 so I've taking the medication for 2 years. I have NO adverse side effects.

It's a little pricey to get started but once the testing is over the creams are very reasonably priced.
07/10/2010
Alura Une Alura Une
I haven't liked to bring myself to orgasm with vibrators. I need direct stimulation to my clitty, and vibrators are usually too intense for direct application for me. I do on the rare occasion like vibrators for foreplay. I prefer being on top of my partner (Or something soft/firm) to come.
07/14/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
P'Gell - you may want to look up Body Logic link.

They did a thorough hormonal analysis on both my wife and I. She is also peri-menopausal and it turned out her sensitive breasts and PMS issues were related to estrogen dominance - which ...
Thanks, Gunsmoke. I've had my hormones tests, although what I need is a salivary T test, because blood levels of testosterone vary and are hard to test properly. I am not estrogen dominant, although probably was a few years ago, when I had no problem with orgasm. It's one of the first signs of peri-menopause, then you get estrogen deficient and the night sweats, the hot flashes, your pubic hair and other hair starts to disappear, and in my case, my sex drive went through the ROOF when my E levels first dropped, then it leveled out some, but we had to drop the dose of my E creme and I have to use a Progesterone supplement about 5 to 10 days a month. The progesterone creams just didn't do it for me. I'm SO sensitive to hormones and especially progesterone, too much and I lose my drive, too little and the estrogen takes over.

T cream used to be available over the counter, and then people started using it for body building. My T is considered "normal" on the lower side of the spectrum, but seeing as my drive has always been really high for a woman, "normal range" for me is probably a little low. I know women who have solved their orgasm problems with T cremes or Estra-Test,(and estrogen-testosterone pill, which my doctor claims he know NOTHING about...) and I need to get on my doc's ass about prescribing some. What a pain the in ass.....

Sorry you and your wife are going through the same thing.
07/14/2010
Red Riding Hood Red Riding Hood
There's a big debate over vibrators decreasing sensitivity, but the fact is, you're not making the skin tough and you're not killing nerve endings. If you start to notice that your orgasms are taking more work, skip the vibe once in awhile and eventually you'll notice you're more sensitive. There's no harm in exploring.
07/30/2010
Rossie Rossie
Maybe I'm crazy, but I never switch the vibrator on even if the function is available on my toys. I prefer a good stroking with my toy manually while rubbing my clit. I have no problem having orgasms that way. I cannot stand the buzzing movements and sounds!
07/30/2010
A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople)
With a parner - no, not hard. By myself - I'm too used to vibrators, so it is hard. And not so bright.
02/02/2011
Total posts: 28
Unique posters: 24