I'm about the same age but I had everything removed at 29. I went through years where I could have cared less about sex.. The past several years things have changed. I've not done anything different (medications, HRT, or anything like that) but my sex drive has soared.. I still have days I could care less but they are a lot less. I think you have to take advantage of the days you are in the mood and hope hubby understands. Mine is great about it. On the off days, he can sometimes get me in the mood by giving me a massage or even helping me out around the house.

I'd try using the hot and cold as reasons to try new things like using ice when you're hot or warming a toy when you're cold. There are endless possibilities that you can do with this.

Sometimes a glass of wine will help with the blah feelings and help get me in the mood. My hubby plays bartender sometimes and makes fruity drinks that are so cool and refreshing.

Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm 50 now and was plunged into menopause when all the internal girly bits were removed at age 46. While I was suffering with hot flashes I don't think I felt much like it either. Now I have an estrogen patch and I consider it to be an extreme quality of life improvement. My flashes were intense and frequent.

Now that I'm not bothered by hot flashes, my drive has soared too. Plus, I want to make sure I have frequent stimulation because after menopause you can tighten, shorten, become less elastic and more dry otherwise. Use it or lose it as they say.

My wife is dealing with this right now. It has been a challenge for us both. I am in no way saying that I as a guy have any idea what you women are going through with this physical change. I could not imagine. But please know that for us men it is difficult as well to know what we can do to help and when we are just being an insesitive jerk. Any help you can give us would be appreciated. Cue ards might be nice....

My wife is also starting to go thru menopause and she is so damn horny. It doesn't take much to get her wet and she gets really excited at the sight of a man's muscles (biceps, abs, sholders, etc). She wants is in the morning (thankfully weekends only or I'd be late to work every day) and in the evenings too. She was like this when she was pregnant. Oral sex is a big thing too. She used to tolerate me going down, but now she absolutely loves it. We will start making out and soon she will be pushing my head down. Not that I mind it, but it's a big change. Anyone else having a similar "problem?"

it scares me too...