I agree. I was having fun with just my fingers long before I started using toys. I got my first bullet because my hands would get tired during sex, and many of the toys that followed because of mobility issues. When my hands cramp up, they just aren't very nimble. However, if a woman has learned a lot about her body and still can't bring herself to orgasm, then by all means, bring toys to the rescue!

And stress? Just about as big a libido-killer as anything else I've ever found. I can go for weeks without orgasm if I get too stressed out.

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That so made me want to say something that might be considered inappropriate, but I was laughing!

yeah, the idea of buying toys before using the free things just doesn't make sense to me.

If someone has, i'm not down on them...i just don't get it.

Yeah, there's no way my fingers can replicate what toys do for me. That being said, I do know what *type* of stimulation I like best from knowing my body.

Same here. I couldn't have said it better.

I'm ok if my argument is flawed, and open to discussion. I'm sorry if I upset you in any way.

I started this because primarily in reference to the thread about giving a toy to an adolescent and some of the adolescents that I know that want birth control. I've found that sexual experiences for me NOW and the toys can do far far more than they I ever knew when I was young, but I don't think they could have without that exploration and knowledge.

But I don't understand why toys can't be apart of that exploration and knowledge. Why don't they count?

Oh come on.....so you haven't been to Sears or Home Depot and bought a shitload of drillbits, a few hammers, a million different screw drivers and wrenches just so you will have the perfect "tool" to fix something?

....and really you gotta get well aquainted with your nuts. Its unbelievable how young some guys get testicular cancer. (And this is cool, they make silicone testicular replacements. They are alot like breast implants. All different sizes. )


Experiment. Than you don't miss anything.

They do count... I personally might not have learned the power of imagination or when and how to use my hands if I learned toys first.

Can I assume that it's easy for you to get off with toys then?

It's not for every woman. I can never guarantee an orgasm and even when I know it's going to happen, they've never amazing. When you struggle, you'll take every tool you can get whether it's attached to your body or battery powered. I'm not every woman but the fact that you may have never given your hands a chance is your own personal flaw, not that of womankind.

I agree, Dragon, for most women, learning how your body responds sexually should probably predate starting in with sex toys. Kid eat their food with their fingers before they use utensils, don't they? Kind of the same idea. You play with your food, feel the texture, learn what you like and don't like, before you go to tools. But, you can still fall back on your hands when it feels appropriate.

There are some women who have masturbated and had partnered sex for years and can't seem to find their orgasm. I think if they have investigated all the psychological shit that was thrust upon them as kids, and disregard most of the Guilt factor with sex, and still can't find their Orgasms, then, of course, trying some toys, even at a younger age, to be able to orgasm is certainly acceptable.

Every person's body is different, and I do agree with you, but each woman needs to make her own choice. Manual masturbation is a great skill, one should keep in good working order throughout one's life, if possible, and should at least be given a good try (IMO over a period of months, if "not working" right away) before silicone and plastic are entered into the equation.

But, if a woman simply can't make it happen, then, of course, By Any Means Necessary.