The New Intimacy

Cold sores & Herpes

Skip to last post
Set alerts
Updates
Forum search
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
1. Do you have cold sores or herpes?

2. If you have a cold sore, do you remember not to have oral sex? (Since cold sores can turn into herpes when your mouth touches a person's genitals)

3. Do you treat your cold sores/herpes?

4. How often do you have outbreaks?

Below, please vote and explain your experiences with cold sores or herpes.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, I have cold sores
26
Yes, I have herpes
8
No, I don't have cold sores
42
No, I don't have herpes
54
I have no idea if I have cold sores or herpes
2
I think I may have cold sores or herpes
3
Yes, I remember not to have oral sex so that my cold sores don't turn into herpes
18
No, I rarely remember
1
I had no effing idea cold sores could turn into actual herpes
8
Yes, I treat my cold sores/herpes
25
No, I do not treat my cold sores/herpes
8
Yes, I get cold sores/herpes outbreaks often
2
I don't get many outbreaks of cold sores or herpes
30
Total votes: 227 (88 voters)
Poll is closed
08/10/2011
  • Treat Her! Gift Set For Women For $69.99 Only
  • Complete lovers gift set
  • Upgrade Your Hands-Free Play!
  • Long-distance pleasure set for couples
  • Save Extra 20% On Love Cushion And Toy Set!
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Contributor: MaryExy MaryExy
I had cold sores every now and then as a kid, before I even knew what oral sex was. I haven't had them in, like, 10 years, so I don't consider it an issue right now. My guy has oral herpes, but hasn't had a cold sore since he was a kid. We both know the signs to look for before a cold sore comes, though, and what to do to prevent them if we ever feel that one is coming on.
08/10/2011
Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
I've gotten cold sores since I was in my 20's. I use 1000mg of Valtrex to treat them when I feel one coming on and Denavir cream to reduce them. Hate those little suckers! I have always been so careful, no kissing, no oral, no using my tube of lipstick until it's healed.
08/10/2011
Contributor: toxie m toxie m
I have genital herpes and I have outbreaks once every 3 months. It's pretty exact, which is a pain because that's more frequent than I'd like but it's also nice to know when to start preparing for one. I only medicate when I feel an outbreak coming on, I don't take anything as a suppressive in between. I refrain from any sexual contact if I'm feeling at all iffy and so far it seems to have been effective - it's over a year now and my boyfriend's still symptom-free.
08/10/2011
Contributor: Coralbell Coralbell
I get cold sores. I got them more often when I was a kid, but now it's once a year if even. I avoid oral sex if I have one or feel like one might be coming on. My boyfriend didn't know that cold sores could get transferred to the genitals, and when I first explained it to him he freaked out a little bit knowing that I have the virus.
08/10/2011
Contributor: Endocott Endocott
I don't have cold sores. My gf gets them once in a blue moon (hasn't had an episode in over a year).
08/10/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
I have herpes, but very rarely have outbreaks. When I have an outbreak or feel one coming on, I treat it with Valtrex.

I've been with my husband for almost 9 years now and he is still disease free. I use an IUD, so we don't use condoms or anything like that. We just avoid sexual contact from the time I feel a sore developing until it's long gone.
08/10/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
You can read a lot more about my experiences with herpes in the article that I wrote for EdenCafe.

Living With Herpes.
08/10/2011
Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
Quote:
Originally posted by Ivy Wilde
You can read a lot more about my experiences with herpes in the article that I wrote for EdenCafe. Living With Herpes.
Great article!
08/10/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Ivy Wilde
You can read a lot more about my experiences with herpes in the article that I wrote for EdenCafe. Living With Herpes.
Thank you for taking the time to write such an incredibly informative article.
08/10/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
cold sores ARE herpes. there are 2 types of the herpes virus, 1 and 2. one type (cant remember which, sorry) is more often found on the mouth, the other more often on the genitals, but they are both herpes.

and yes of course i'm careful during oral. i dont even let him kiss me then go down on me (if he's even allowed to kiss me at all. i've already, unfortunately, passed it to him orally. he was warned and told not to kiss me but insisted on it. now he has it too. lesson learned, let's hope.)
herpes down there is NOT something i want to carry around. it's bad enough my mom passed it on to me, genetically (or otherwise? not sure how that happened, but she gets them too, on her lips)

i treat them immediately with abreva, and if i catch it within the first hour or so they will oftentimes not even fully develop. but they always come back.


triggers are

dry lips with long open-mouthed dentist visits
sunburned lips
stress to the lip area (getting hit)
stress in general
the herpes virus up and getting the urge to piss me off and cause me pain again


i definitely recommend abreva for treatment. it's $17 for a tiny tube but totally worth it. and a little goes a long way. if you only get a breakout once every now and then you can use the same tube for years.


08/11/2011
Contributor: LostBoy988 LostBoy988
I've had cold sores before but had been tested and do not have herpes.
08/11/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I get cold sores only when I'm ultra stressed or get a cold and only on the face - no genitals. I refuse to do anything sexual while I have them - including no kissing. These bloody things are a curse and I wouldn't wish them on my enemies!

I use to use the stupid cold sore ointments, but found them bloody useless! Most would freak out or tell ya not to do what I do, but when I have a cold sore I want it gone ASAP and will do ANYTHING for that to happen.
As soon as I feel the first little twinge of a cold sore coming on I hit it with straight Hydrogen Peroxide. Then I keep applying it until the blisters have totally healed up.
Before treating them this way they would hang around for 7 - 8 days making me bloody miserable.
With the Hydrogen I can often get rid of them within 4 days - sometimes the blisters won't even come up at all if I get onto the twinge soon enough.
And it never leaves a scar on me at all - ever.
It does really bite, but I feel a little pain is fully worth the relief.
08/11/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I don't get cold sores, but My Man gets them from time to time. I have to completely avoid receiving oral sex until it has healed, because herpes in the genital region is awfully painful. And the "type" really doesn't matter anymore, because most people not only HAVE herpes, (estimated between 60 and 98% of the adult population) but have either "type" in either region.) but due to the increase in oral sex both "types" are now seen in both regions with about the same percentages.

Abreva actually can work both orally and in the genital region! There are several prescription drugs, taken either orally or used topically, that also shorten the outbreak and reduce the ability of the virus to be transmitted.

This is one of those STIs that is of usually little consequence, (except for the pain) as most people find it "burns out" after a decade or two (meaning people have less and less outbreaks as they get older) The only slight risks are during childbirth (and contact with any sores or when the mother is shedding virus can be tested for and precautions can be taken to prevent any transmission to the baby.) People with compromised immune systems can get quite sick from any kind of herpes, as can newborns, but most people over the age of 4-6 weeks who have a normal immune system find this condition more of a nuisance than anything else.

I still don't' let him kiss me on the mouth or give me oral sex when he has an oral outbreak. Luckily, his outbreaks have been fewer and fewer, so it has becomes less of an issue (not that it was that big of an issue to start.)
08/11/2011
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by Coralbell
I get cold sores. I got them more often when I was a kid, but now it's once a year if even. I avoid oral sex if I have one or feel like one might be coming on. My boyfriend didn't know that cold sores could get transferred to the genitals, ... more
I had the same issue. I have cold sores and I am very careful with those little bitches, however my husband was really weirded out at the time when I first explained that they can transfer to actual genital herpes. Depending on the person's immune system, even herpes of the mouth.

I don't get frequent outbreaks but when I do I stay away from everything. No sharing drinks, using lipstick/gloss/chapsti ck, no oral sex, no kissing, etc.
08/13/2011
Contributor: CherryDyke CherryDyke
Thankfully neither. Once thought I had one, turned out in was just bitten skin.
09/02/2011
Contributor: ThoughtsAblaze ThoughtsAblaze
Herpes and cold sores are definitely the same thing! I get cold sores on my mouth (sometimes inside ) when I'm ultra-ultra stressed. I got them often as a kid, but thankfully, I've made the connection to stress and my mom has discovered Abreva (she and my brother get them too). If I've had a rough week and feel the slightest tingle, I grab the Abreva. I'm in my 20s now and only get maybe one a year, if that, so perhaps I'm finally "growing out" of it?
09/03/2011
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
I'm lucky enough to be CMV negative in my mid-20's. No cold sores, no herpes, and not even the chicken pox virus, so they use my blood for the immuno-compromised. I thought that my ex had given me cold sores, but it turned out that I just had a really, really awkwardly placed pimple on the edge of my lip. The Red Cross confirmed that I was still CMV negative and I never got another bump there.

Because I've made it this far, I'm very twitchy about keeping myself protected. I don't share anything that goes on my mouth with anyone I don't know for certain doesn't get them or isn't anywhere near an outbreak... and the outbreak has to be someone I'm close with.
09/10/2011
Contributor: ScotchIrish ScotchIrish
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
1. Do you have cold sores or herpes?

2. If you have a cold sore, do you remember not to have oral sex? (Since cold sores can turn into herpes when your mouth touches a person's genitals)

3. Do you treat your cold ... more
For once, the list of options was great. Kudos to you. You thought long and hard and gave so many options. You should do more. I don't have cold sores, herpes or any other STD's, never had. But, after 21 years of marriage. I am starting to go out and I read everything I can about this stuff. Thank you for a good Q and all the very best. Oh, and lots of safe sex to everyone. It has been years for me and I can't wait. Well, I have to till I find a girlfriend and or a positive situation. Wish me _uck!
09/20/2011
Contributor: sweetcaroline sweetcaroline
I have genetic herpes, and I use Abreva- which actually works.
It makes the healing process go faster/smoother.
And yes, my partner and I are crazy paranoid about herpes, so when either of us has one, there's no kissing/oral. (which makes sex hilarious.)
11/10/2011
Contributor: FaerieLove FaerieLove
Both me and my partner suffer from cold sores. So we try to avoid kissing each other/oral sex when we have them. We use abreva which REALLY helps.
Also cool little fact,
If you have contracted one of the herpes strains you have a 45% chance of not contracting the second strain due to the fact that your body has already built up immunity to herpes virus. Cool huh
11/10/2011
Contributor: Mihoshi4301 Mihoshi4301
Luckily, I've never had a problem with cold sores or anything.
11/10/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
Quote:
Originally posted by LostBoy988
I've had cold sores before but had been tested and do not have herpes.
if you've had cold sores, then you have herpes. that's what a cold sore is, a sore that contains the herpes virus. I'm interested in how you've gotten tested because most STD tests won't show that you have it anyway
11/10/2011
Contributor: A Woman And Her Wand A Woman And Her Wand
I honestly had no idea that some people DON'T get cold sores, lol. I knew they were herpes, but I thought they were pretty common, esp in the winter.
11/11/2011
Contributor: Lindsey123 Lindsey123
I get cold sores about once or twice a year. I knew they were a form of herpes, but until med school, I had no clue they could turn into herpes.
12/05/2011
Contributor: PunkyB PunkyB
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
cold sores ARE herpes. there are 2 types of the herpes virus, 1 and 2. one type (cant remember which, sorry) is more often found on the mouth, the other more often on the genitals, but they are both herpes.

and yes of course i'm careful ... more
I have that same problem. And I absolutely love abreva.

You can get valtrex perscribed for your cold sores as well and it works awesome. I need to go back to the doctor and get my perscription refilled for it. Seriously a lifesaver so you dont have to worry about the long recovery time even with abreva
12/05/2011
Contributor: TexasBrat TexasBrat
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
1. Do you have cold sores or herpes?

2. If you have a cold sore, do you remember not to have oral sex? (Since cold sores can turn into herpes when your mouth touches a person's genitals)

3. Do you treat your cold ... more
I rarely get cold sores, never really have. I do have herpes. Of course I know when I'm having an outbreak, and abstain from sex entirely. Sometimes I do treat a sore, sometimes I don't. Sometimes, when treating a sore, the application of the medicine irritates it more, I usually know when it's that kind of sore though. I haven't had an outbreak in about 5 months I believe. When it first flared up, I got a sore every month, right after my period. When pregnant, I got one every single month. Not fun. Now, I may get 2 or 3 a year.
04/01/2012
Contributor: TexasBrat TexasBrat
Quote:
Originally posted by LostBoy988
I've had cold sores before but had been tested and do not have herpes.
Herpes doesn't normally show up on regular STD screens/pap screens. It can show up in a blood test, but sometimes it won't even register then. Normal exams for women, unless requested, don't involve the drawing of blood. It is only truly confirmed when you have your first outbreak, then they do a scraping (which is hell), and send it off to the lab.
04/01/2012
Contributor: badk1tty badk1tty
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
1. Do you have cold sores or herpes?

2. If you have a cold sore, do you remember not to have oral sex? (Since cold sores can turn into herpes when your mouth touches a person's genitals)

3. Do you treat your cold ... more
I don't get coldsores/herpes.
04/25/2012
Contributor: ghalik ghalik
I have no herpes... which I find remarkable considering how much I bum chapstick off my friends and share drinks, etc.
04/25/2012