It's totally normal! For some women it takes a couple months, others a year or so. Your body changes after having a baby, hormones and chemical changes as well as the physical changes which in themselves can make a difference! So it's normal.

Gallowraven, if your baby is still breastfeeding, your estrogen levels may still be low and that could mildly effect arousal in some women. If you are finished breastfeeding and are getting regular periods, then it would be a good idea to see your GYN to have your hormones tested to make sure your estrogen, progesterone and testosterone levels are where they should be.

Instead of masturbating, could your partner do the work to "warm you up?" I know often My Man and I take over an hour of play before we even think about penetration and PIV sex. Sometimes we both want a slow warm up, and lots of oral and manual sex and toy play makes this easy.

But, 18 months is a bit of a long time to still be feeling "under the weather" sexually, although still in the realm of "normal" sexual response. If your baby wakes in the night a lot, or is very very active (I'm talking about babies who sleep 6 or 7 hours at night, waking once or twice and then only take a 45 minute nap ONCE each day and are going full blast the other 17 hours a day) you could just be exhausted. If that's what it is, and your hormones are what they should be at this point in the baby's life (and the baby is weaned, if the baby is still nursing don't bother with the hormone tests, because you have a different body state that most doctors don't know how to interpret) time may help. If not, MORE oral and manual and toy play before PIV is started and keep a dialogue going with your doctor if the problem continues.

she isn't breast feeding and hasn't been for quite some time now. I can't go to a gyno, since I have no insurance, and can not afford the obscene prices they charge. my daughter has insurance though.

Your hormones do change after having a baby, but you've also entered into an entirely new facet of your relationship with yourself, your husband and your daughter. While I have never had a child myself, I have several friends who have described the first few years after having a child as a period of time where they were hyper-aware of everything that was going on and they felt like they were kind of in two places at once.

Over time, in any relationship, that firey lustful need can dwindle into something more comfortable. It doesn't mean that you aren't attracted to your husband or anything like that or that something is wrong in the relationship. It just means you're far more comfortable than you ever have been before. It's a stage I personally think all couples should be so lucky to achieve. If it continues to be bothersome for you or your husband, do some research on natural libido-enhancers. You'll have to try several to find something that works best for you.

I wish the best of luck! And congrats on your daughter!