Help - my libido is gone

No advice here, but I sympathize. Like you I used to be an "every day" kind of girl, but since getting pregnant my drive has gone to almost zero. There are some supplements on the market that claim to increase sex drive, but I haven't tried any of them to know if they work or not. Maybe someone else has some advice for us?

You're probably better off talking to your doctor and seeing what he or she thinks. I'm assuming you're not the only woman to have this happen, so it makes sense that there could be things that can be done to help you work towards getting it back.

My bet is on a hormonal change. Should be temporary. Stay healthy and happy and it should come back before you know it. Oh yeah and tell your partner about it so he doesn't think you don't like him anymore.

It's OK, and normal, to not be interested in sex sometimes. As Fluke said, it's quite likely very temporary. Also excellent advice about telling your partner.

My only thoughts are 1) are you getting enough sleep? and 2) are you getting enough exercise? Sleep deprivation is a VERY common cause of all kinds of problems, including decreased libido. My wife and I have both noticed that if we're not physically active (getting enough exercise), our libidos drop.

eri86's advice about asking your doctor is excellent. I hope you get your groove back soon!

Thanks guys!

Sleep. HA! Okay...some nights yes, in general, probably not. Even when the baby is sleeping well, it's hard to shut down early enough and get to bed at a decent hour. Too much to do usually, and even if I don't want to have sex I still like to spend time with my partner cuddling, watching TV, etc at the end of the night and some nights that means we stay up too late and don't go to bed when we should! Other times like the past week and a bit, the baby has been going through a phase and if I can get more than 4 broken hours a night, I'm lucky. Thankfully she rarely has these little blips and I know it will be over soon!

I have talked to him about it lots, I don't want him to feel like it has anything to do with him. He's actually some what in the same boat right now - all the changes in the last year seem to have killed our libidos both a bit, though his has never been overly high to begin with.

I see my doctor in two weeks (I also experience pain still during sex, so that's likely part of it, and the main reason I'm seeing my doctor) so I will definitely bring it up!

I think part may be self esteem related - I have struggled to get the baby weight off, so I don't feel nearly as comfortable in the bedroom as I used to. The first 6 months it didn't bother me as much because it's "expected" after baby, and I feel like now it should all be gone, and I'm not quite there yet. It just seems weird to me that I am not interested in alone time anymore, either. No matter what has been going on in my life, I've always felt up for that. So to genuinely have no libido right now is very strange for me!!

I was in be same situation for a very long time. Years to be honest. It's hard to get that balance back someone's. I do have a recommendation that has been helping me it is a herbal supplement that you can find at most health food stores or other places that sell similar things. It's called Damiana leaves. I did research and there are several other supplements that say they will boost libido. I didn't want anything that had any negative effects. This was the only one I have tried and stick to it because It worked for me. Good luck and know that you are not alone in this.

Thanks for the tip, it's good to know it's not just me! I'm glad you've found something to help you

I have a feeling my doctor will just tell me to give it more time too. I had a pretty rough go after birth with recovery and infections etc...so I think it's taking my body a while to get back to normal. Hope it gets better sooner rather than later - I'm just lucky my partner is understanding and doesn't seem too bothered by it (yet, anyways!)

Sometimes when I go through low libido phases it helps to just let my partner try to seduce me. He is very determined, and if I let him start to touch me even if I'm not in the mood or even doing something else then a lot of the time I get in the mood.

If you are otherwise healthy it is probably just hormone fluctuations.