Negativity towards your own self?

Negativity towards your own self?

K101 K101
According to a recent US survey, women have an average of 13 negative things to say about themselves each day. 97% will say something negative about their bodies each day.

So, to the other girls here on EF, is this surprising? Are you one of them?

When you read the first couple sentences in this post, did you too think something along the lines of 'wow, I do that and didn't even realize it?'

I had to ask. I'm curious how you other females feel. I know most of us have had self-esteem issues at *some* point, whether it lasts only 3 days out of every month when you're not feeling like yourself or it was just a "spell" you went through in younger years, or if for some, it's actually every single day of their lives.

I'll be honest. I don't always feel that great about myself, and when I first read about this, it was a sort of moment of realization. While I don't actually express negative thoughts about myself orally every single day, I do think I probably think *something* negative about me everyday. Many of the negative things about me that run through my mind aren't body-related, not looks-wise. Mostly my negativity towards myself is probably due to feelings of being inadequate in other ways like being good enough personality-wise. I'd guess half and half. 50% of my negativity is body-wise and the other would be personality wise. Okay, maybe it leans a little. Perhaps 60% are body worries.

I wouldn't say I have low self-esteem, but I could definitely be kinder on some days, to myself. Maybe some of us think we don't deserve it?

Why the heck do we do this!? Are you one too? What would you say causes us to be so hard on ourselves?

Or do you happen to be a confident person who thinks only good things?

For me, I'm not somebody who'll say many negative things I feel about me out loud, but I admit, there've been times when my partner may compliment me and without thinking, I'll immediately object say when I truly feel like I look like total trash and he compliments me. Takes me by surprise, but otherwise, I'll just think the negative things, which is why I think I didn't realize that I do beat myself up a tiny bit each day. Yet, I'm always saying things like "women should not be so hard on themselves. It's such a bad feeling to feel low about yourself." And yet I wasn't entirely innocent. I guess we can't all feel perfect every single moment of our lives, but I do think daily negative thoughts about oneself, even if it's only one thing a day, is bad. It *has* to be turned around. Yet even with inspiration, it seems it's so tough to ever catch on and truly believe good things about ourselves, even if we have someone who passionately expresses such love for everything about us. If you don't feel it, nothing anyone else can say will change your heart, I guess?

Anybody else want to share? On a daily basis, do you feed yourself with negativity? If you were like me and it kind of just now dawned on you that you aren't 100% innocent in this, are you going to try and stop thinking so negatively?

And if you happen to be one who's overcome bad self-esteem, care to share how you did it? Any other thoughts?
10/06/2012
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js250 js250
I do find myself putting my personality, shortcomings and brain damage issues in a negative light. I also feel I must be strong and fearless all the time and when I am not....I get very down on myself. I am a perfectionist and therefore, my own worst enemy.

Physically, strangely enough, not so much now that I have been on EF for awhile...hmmmmm.

Great thread Kendra!!!!
10/06/2012
Taylor Taylor
I know I have a lot of negativity towards myself, but I am working on trying to change that by working with my therapist. I think it has to do with having an eating disorder for so many years. Even though I don't use the eating behaviors anymore, the negativity towards myself is still there and it is something I have to continue to work on.
10/06/2012
LoooveMonkey LoooveMonkey
I used to absolutely hate myself. But when I met my boyfriend, he really helped me to change that. He doesn't lie to me, he only tells me things if he actually thinks them. And he'll tell me I'm beautiful and smart and I can do whatever I want to do with my life. I started to believe him and I'm pretty happy about myself, though I kind of wish I'd think 13 negative things about my body a day. Then maybe I'd remember to be more careful about how much I eat/what I eat. I love food and it tends to get the better of me. ._.;
10/06/2012
Total posts: 4
Unique posters: 4