The New Intimacy

Virgin: painful masturbation with vibrator

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Contributor: kaydeecee kaydeecee
I'm a virgin (not young - to tell my age it's embarrassing) and I've just purchased my first dildo/vibrator. I don't know if I purchased one too big (California Exotic Lilac Dreams Massager) but I thought I was relaxed and wet enough (had a few orgasms and used Astroglide and a condom) the minute I started to insert the vibrator a little, it hurt and burned. I thought it was just because this was new to me, so I took it out and tried to put it back in again - still uncomfortable and small amount of pain and burning. The feeling didn't subside even after I stopped and tried to do it again. Even an hour later, the area near the entrance feels painful. Honestly if this was my introduction to sex, my boyfriend would be freaked and I would probably never do it again.

Just a note, my last ob gyn exam, the doctor could hardly get the speculum in but she just took it in stride and never addressed if there could be a problem.

Question, do I have an infection of some sort or is this a mental issue causing me to tighten up and be uncomfortable.
08/30/2013
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Contributor: kaydeecee kaydeecee
Quote:
Originally posted by kaydeecee
I'm a virgin (not young - to tell my age it's embarrassing) and I've just purchased my first dildo/vibrator. I don't know if I purchased one too big (California Exotic Lilac Dreams Massager) but I thought I was relaxed and wet enough ... more
Just a note after some research - could I be allergic to the latex condom I used?
08/31/2013
Contributor: eri86 eri86
You're probably just tight. I've had similar instances in the past.

How thick is the dildo? My first piece was only an inch across and then I worked my way up to something a bit thicker.

Also, even though you felt wet enough on your own, having some lube on hand can help.
09/04/2013
Contributor: kaydeecee kaydeecee
Quote:
Originally posted by eri86
You're probably just tight. I've had similar instances in the past.

How thick is the dildo? My first piece was only an inch across and then I worked my way up to something a bit thicker.

Also, even though you felt wet enough on ... more
the measurements online 6.5”x 1.5”/17 cm x 4 cm
09/13/2013
Contributor: Nephnay Nephnay
First off, if you had a few orgasms right beforehand, it can make your vagina a bit tense for 5-10 minutes or so, definitely not a good start. You mentioned your gyno had trouble inserting the speculum, and I'm surprised she didn't address it. I think I was a virgin for my first exam, and it only hurt because my doctor was (and still is-ugh) a little impatient. Anyway, if you experience a lot of pain when you try a toy, you may need to start with a finger at a time. I'm not a doctor, so don't bank on my claims, but it sounds a lot like two possibilities, beginners's nervousness, or vaginismus. Vaginismus is where your 'PC' muscles, -those pelvic floor muscles for the kegels everyone talks about- reflexively contract and tense, making any kind of penetration painful. You should look it up online (just to see if it fits the bill) and confirm with your gyno. There are special toys for the -common- issue you are dealing with, called dilators, to slowly acclimatize you to penetration. I hope this helps!
12/21/2013