Anal..

Contributor: NicNat NicNat
NicNat
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So me and my husband tried anal play last night for the first time(on him) and he absoultely LOVED it, he said it felt so good, but it made him fill gay.. Does anyone know how I can explain to him it doesn't make him gay?? Please help.. Cause it was a turn on for the both of us, and I would love to keep being able to do it..
10/27/2011
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Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Does he find other men to be sexually attractive? If not, he's not gay. The definition of homosexuality is finding members of the same gender to be sexually attractive, not what activities you enjoy. There's nothing wrong with a straight man enjoying anal play, and stimulating the prostate is actually really good for men - it reduces the risk of prostate cancer. This website alone has plenty of testimonials of straight men having fun with anal, either along or with their girlfriend or wife.

Think of it this way: if enjoying anal play made a man gay, then enjoying oral and fingering would make a woman a lesbian. Doesn't make much sense, does it?
10/27/2011
Contributor: NicNat NicNat
Quote:
Originally posted by Rin (aka Nire)
Does he find other men to be sexually attractive? If not, he's not gay. The definition of homosexuality is finding members of the same gender to be sexually attractive, not what activities you enjoy. There's nothing wrong with a straight man ... more
Thats what i tried telling him.. lol. But hopefully if he reads other people saying it he will listen more.
10/27/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
This is something that comes up all the time. Like Nire said, unless he is attracted to men, it does not make him gay. I enjoy anal play just as much as jacking off and I am no where near gay.

There are as many, if not more, nerves in the anus as any other sexual organ. As such a lot of pleasure can be had from anal play. Not only that but the prostate is very similar to the female G-spot. Stimulating the prostate during masturbation will product very a intense climax and a lot more ejaculate. Some guys can even have orgasms from stimulating it, with out penile stimulation. Have him check out my work shop for more info on that.

I hope he comes around, it will make you two closer as a couple and it is quite healthy for him. If not, don't push it. Some guys just don't like it, just like some girls don't like it.
10/27/2011
Contributor: NicNat NicNat
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
This is something that comes up all the time. Like Nire said, unless he is attracted to men, it does not make him gay. I enjoy anal play just as much as jacking off and I am no where near gay.

There are as many, if not more, nerves in the ... more
I will defentily have him look at that. A

And I'm not forceing him or even bugging him about it, But like the oter night I was right in the middel of giving him head, then he told me to rub his butt, so I did then he just shoved my finger in it.. Might sound a little bit like WOW, but I mean, he did it. Thats what I don't get it.
10/28/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
The more my wife does it - the more I like it - she's learning how to make it work. Now that she sees how explosive it makes my orgasms, she's now OK with trying out for herself - it's been fun!
10/29/2011
Contributor: Toys in Love Toys in Love
I didn't know a whole lot about sex toys, or male pleasure you could get from them when used anally, when first meeting my girlfriend. She got me into all this Anyway, I wasn't actually feeling my sence of sexuality waiver because of it, but did feel rather... odd, about the whole thing. - But it felt so bloody amazing we kept doing it, and today I love it when she puts on the harness. So just keep at it, pretty soon he'll be craving it
11/01/2011
Contributor: squire squire
First, I'd say that pleasure is pleasure and there is no shame in enjoying your body or your partner playing with it. Second, sexual pleasure doesn't determine your orientation no matter what society tell us. From what I understand (nonscientific) oral sex is more common among gay males than is anal sex, and I doubt that he feels that concern around his orientation when receiving oral from you Plus, for some men this is a threshold that needs to be overcome. Finding out that you can truly let go sexually, be completely vulnerable and trusting of your partner in such an intimate way can be very powerful and take time to allow, that time can also serve to intensify the experience and orgasms in a positive way and the intimacy between you both. This is especially the case if he feels he can trust you, and allow your assertiveness to guide his experience....as, unlike the penis, he can't really see what you're doing down there. Total sensory experience Good luck and enjoy I know I do.
11/01/2011
Contributor: NicNat NicNat
Thank you eveyone for your comments. (: He is startin got like it more, like last nigth during oral he actually told me to start playing with it, so he's easing up to it, and he keeps sayiing how good it feels, and how much he is happy that we started doing it. So I'm pretty happy!!
11/01/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by NicNat
Thank you eveyone for your comments. (: He is startin got like it more, like last nigth during oral he actually told me to start playing with it, so he's easing up to it, and he keeps sayiing how good it feels, and how much he is happy that we ... more
Very cool, pretty soon he'll be asking for the harness. lol
11/01/2011
Contributor: geliebt geliebt
Glad things are working for you! This is definitely an issue I've seen around often, it seems to be a common concern.
11/10/2011
Contributor: Dear Ruby Dear Ruby
Quote:
Originally posted by NicNat
Thank you eveyone for your comments. (: He is startin got like it more, like last nigth during oral he actually told me to start playing with it, so he's easing up to it, and he keeps sayiing how good it feels, and how much he is happy that we ... more
It's good to hear of a man learning to enjoy his body. There's a lot more to a man than his dick, and it's a shame more guys don't know that.
11/13/2011
Contributor: Cherrylane Cherrylane
I would be tempted to explore exactly what he means by "gay" also. It might have made him feel more submissive or vulnerable than he was used to or expected to feel, and he may have translated that feeling into "feeling gay." It would be good to know how he's processing his feelings on it.
11/13/2011
Contributor: MJisfreaky MJisfreaky
Quote:
Originally posted by NicNat
So me and my husband tried anal play last night for the first time(on him) and he absoultely LOVED it, he said it felt so good, but it made him fill gay.. Does anyone know how I can explain to him it doesn't make him gay?? Please help.. Cause it ... more
Just let him Know a lot of guys do enjoy it that are not gay. I do the same thing with my wife and really enjoy it. Does not mean that I am gay. I am not attracted to guys at all. I am sure he is not either. let him know that it is only natural that he gets turned on by it that the male g spot there.
11/13/2011
Contributor: Kendrir Kendrir
I can understand the feelings, and yes, it mostly stems from the common social stigma that says "guys enjoying having their butts played with are irreconcilably gay". Realizing I had zero romantic desire for dudes was key for me.
11/13/2011
Contributor: Ash1141 Ash1141
My hubby loves being pegged. At first, I was the one that was wondering about him but I realized awhile back that he's so not gay. He wants nothing to do with men. Doesn't find them attractive whatsoever. It just feels good and gives him a rocking orgasm.
11/15/2011
Contributor: Kirill1171 Kirill1171
Mmm)
02/13/2012
Contributor: dks210 dks210
He's only "gay" if he's attracted to men, not if he finds pleasure in a certain sex act.
02/13/2012
Contributor: Andrey2052 Andrey2052
If he have sex only for you he is not gay. Gay is love and sex with man.
02/19/2012
Contributor: Jordan B Jordan B
At first thats how i felt, but it went away very fast, i love my girlfriend, been together for 5 years and thats not going to change. I love anal play and i am not gay. if u love your gf/wife, then u shouldnt be worried about anything.
03/08/2012
Contributor: AbbyLover AbbyLover
i love it im not gay. we are like anamals and we want pleasure and we are smart so we find it in many diffrent forms hand job blow job message anal and so on. enuf said
04/12/2012
Contributor: pootpootpoot pootpootpoot
My first boyfriend had the same problem! He was science-minded, so I just told him that it made sense biologically, because the stuff he was into was stimulating his prostate. After that, he felt much more comfortable with it.
04/12/2012