To sleep, but not to dream

As someone who avoids the Fifty Shades of Grey "novels" at all costs, I was interested to see where their product line would go. I had hoped that the products would be of an incredibly high quality to match the high price tag, but if this blindfold is anything to go on, the case is rather unfortunately the opposite - the manufacturers are hoping to skate by on hype alone. There's nothing actively wrong with it, it's just very run-of-the-mill and a little bit too tacky for my tastes.
Published:
Pros
Packaging
Cons
Nothing Special
Rating by reviewer:
3
extremely useful review
The Fifty Shades of Grey All Mine Deluxe Blindfold was offered to me as a free assignment, and I accepted it as I was curious about the product line. The only bindfolds that I have any experience with are the sleep kind, and I wondered how this straight line of fabric would hold up blocking out the light when it was shaped nothing like what I considered to be "traditional."

This blindfold is about 52" from end to end, which gives one quite enough length when tying it and leaves the ties hanging down, which can be either a good or a bad thing. In order to get it to block out all light, it must be tied rather tightly. Which, were one buying this because they were interested in BDSM, may be less of an issue, but for someone simply wishing explore sensory deprivation, it's not quite as ideal. There are thin wires at the top and bottom of the eye region so that you can give the blindfold a more shaped contour around your nose, but this thickness also means that it's a bit heavy to wear on your eyes, so again, if you're simply looking for something that allows sensory deprivation without absolutely being noticed at all times, this might not be ideal. There is also clearly visible stitching where the wires lie, which takes away from the flawless satin of the fabric and makes it look a little bit tacky.

Speaking of tacky, there's an official Fifty Shades of Grey tag sewn onto the black side of the blindfold - I suppose if one were absolutely smitten with the idea of owning official merchandise, this might be acceptable, but it's not done elegantly at all, in my opinion. The name tag is simply sewn on, where some tasteful embroidery would have done a much more elegant job and suited the satin ribbon much better. The tag is made of a rougher material, which is a shame as it also ruins the smooth line of the ties. As implied, the fabric itself is soft and satiny, which makes it quite comfortable against the skin, but the thickness of the ribbon means that your ears do tend to get in the way a little bit unless you tie it over your ears, which was just too uncomfortable for me to entertain.

It seems to be durable enough, though there were a couple of loose strings near the stitching on its arrival, but it's absolutely nothing special. For the price tag, I would have expected something with much neater stitching and neater lines. I anticipate that care would be rather easy - hand wash and lay flat to dry - but as I haven't used this for anything untoward, I have yet to have had to actually clean it.

The packaging is actually my favorite thing about this product. Were I a fan of Fifty Shades, I would have undoubtedly been most impressed. The box is very solidly constructed, and the blindfold is presented beautifully inside, which would make this a great gift for your partner, should he or she be an avid fan. The blindfold comes with a silver satin storage bag emblazoned with "Fifty Shades of Grey" in large black print, which can also inspire avid fans of the book.
Follow-up commentary
This rarely makes it out of the box. You'd be better off with a scarf or perhaps something from Lelo if you're really keen on the real thing. I stand by the word "tacky" as perfectly summing this product up.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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  • Contributor: Thea Gregory
  • Contributor: Wicked Wahine
    What a shame and a marvel that they were able to make something tacky when it was so unnecessary and easily avoided given they had satin to work with. I would have thought of anything in the line, this would be the least likely to be a dud -- guess not.
  • Contributor: surreptitious
    That is exactly what I thought too! I mean, it's a decent enough blindfold, but for the price, I would expect something not only higher-end but with a little bit more class.
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