Crystal passion nubby probe - dildo sex toy by Cal Exotics - review by Respectable Curiosity

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A Bumpy Ride Worth Holding on For

All in all, I love this toy. I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys a lot of texture and stimulation with just penetration or harness play. Being water proof and having the suction base allows you to play in or out of the shower and in multiple places! I think that it's more "bang" for your buck too! For being under $20, you really can't go wrong.
Strong suction base, Lots of stimulating textures, No smell, Price, Splash/Water proof
Girth, Can not be sterilized
Rating by reviewer:
useful review


The Crystal Passion Probe is best used for penetration. It has a large suction base that suctions to any flat surface, making it perfect for hands free play. The flared suction base also makes it compatible with harnesses.

This probe would probably be best suited for users who are experienced in deeply textured toys. The bumps rise off the probe, making the spaces between them very deep. While this provides a lot of stimulation, for most beginners this stimulation could be painful or otherwise not enjoyed.

The Passion Probe is very versatile in the ways it can be used. It can be used hands free using the suction base on a flat surface, in a harness, or using the base as a handle. This allows you to choose the angles of penetration, depending on where or how you use it. The probe is also non-porous and water/splash proof, making it perfect for showers/tubs.

I warn users who are smaller/tighter vaginally (or anally), to use this dildo with caution. The bumps provide a lot of girth and could be too wide for smaller/tighter users, causing tearing or bruising.

If using this toy anally, you should always use a condom. Even though it is non-porous PVC can not be sterilized. If you do use this anally without a condom, it should not be used vaginally again, being that there is no way to eliminate bacteria from the toy completely.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Gender play
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Anal
    • G-spot
    • Vaginal

Material / Texture

First impressions were great! There was no smell, no notable taste, and the texture was surprising. I was expecting it to be more hard and inflexible, but was surprised to find it was a little rubbery and soft, not squishy but bendable.

The texturing bumps are smooth, give a little when you press them, and rise quite a bit off the actual dong, adding a lot of stimulation. For users who are not used to deeply textured toys could consider this feeling painful. So please use caution if you're using this as your first textured toy.

The suction base is also textured with multiple rising vein-like lines. This is great stimulation when the dong is fully inserted.
    • Bumpy
    • Harness compatible
    • No odor

Design / Shape / Size

For size this guy is quite a BIG one. He is 1-5/8" thick and, for me, that's quite a bit. I personally like the design, clear and simple. It suctions nicely to any flat surface, allowing hands-free play or use of another toy, such as a vibrator, for extra stimulation.

The shape would make you think it would be difficult reaching the G-spot, but actually the bumps helped reach it better than any g-spot toy I have!

The suction cup bottom attached to almost anything: my smooth walls and doors at my home, the shower and bath, and mirrors. It did not stick to my dresser or chairs. The suction base was very sturdy, it didn't slip or un-suction making play very, very fun.

I would not call the design discreet but I would consider it travel friendly. Being made from PVC, there are no metal parts that could set off the metal detectors.
    • Partner play
    • Whimsical / artistic


The suction cup bottom is, what I believe, the best part of the toy. It allows you to have the freedom of different positions, harness compatibility, and hands free play.

When using this toy, I first tried it with my partner. Laying down on the bed and having him manipulate it. I found this to be unpleasant. I'm not sure if it was because of the position or what, but it was not my favorite position. I found that mounting the suction cup to the shower floor and shower wall to be the most stimulating for me. I read in another review that there was a problem with the toy feeling "like a cold piece of plastic". But I personally had no problem with that. Upon inserting the toy it warmed up quickly to body temperature.

The base was very strong when suctioned in place. When on the wall it sticks straight out and is very easily inserted with the smooth tip. While using it, it didn't slide around or pop off the wall. When I removed it from the wall and floor, it didn't leave any residue or marking.
    • Easy to use
    • Lots of variety in function

Care and Maintenance

Caring and cleaning for this toy is simple. It is made from PVC, a plastic material. It is nonporous so you can use mild soap and warm water or any commercial toy cleaners. I found that this toy did not melt or attract colors from other toys, but it did attract a little bit of fuzz from the lining of the toy box. Both water and silicone lubes are compatible with this probe.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store


The packaging was a simple blister pack with a cardboard insert. The cardboard had the name of the toy "Crystal Passion Nubby Probe" printed on the top, as well as "harness compatible". There were no instructions included. However, it is made for penetration so no instructions are really needed. The packaging has an 80's-looking type font and color to me. I personally wouldn't recommend it "as is" for a gift.
    • Not discreet
    • Recyclable

Personal comments

This "passion probe" at first was not so passionate for me. I am personally inexperienced with textured toys, so my first attempt was not successful. It was not until I switched to riding the toy while in the shower did I really experience the passion.


This "passion probe" at first was not so passionate for me. I am personally inexperienced with textured toys, so my first attempt was not successful. It was not until I switched to riding the toy while in the shower did I really experience the passion.

The first time we used the Passion Probe, I was convinced that it was not going to be a good ride. We tried letting him manipulate it while I lay on the bed. It was a no go. We switched to many, many positions and still it would not be pleasurable. Finally we gave up and he suggested we label this toy as my "solo" toy.

The next day I tried this toy in the shower. I suctioned it to the floor and boy did I get a wet ride! This position was so much more comfortable. The bumps hit all the right spots, stimulated my g-spot and clitoris and made me come again and again! The first toy to make me do this that didn't vibrate!

In my opinion, it's all about position and lube. Being such a wide toy, a lot of lube was needed for me.
Follow-up commentary
Even though this guy has fallen to the back of the toy box, he is still a fun ride. He still sticks to everything and is great for temperature play.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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This review was edited by
  • Darling Jen Darling Jen
  • Rank:
  • Edited reviews: 93
  • Darling Jen
    You did a really good job on this one, ResCu! I'm so proud. I have to admit that this looks alien-like.
  • Respectable Curiosity
    Thank you! It was a little intimidating at first, but I soon found out it was just a big ole' love bug
  • Beth D
    Oh wow, this thing looks extraterrestrial Glad it works for you!
  • ~LaUr3n~
    Is the 1 5/8" from bump to bump or is it the base diameter without the bumps? Does that make sense? lol
  • Respectable Curiosity
    Lauren yea it does make sense, and To be honest my guy and I figured it was with the bumps. or "humps" as he liked to call them hahaha.

    Beth D yea it looks crazy. We had a good laugh the first hour we opened it.

    But don't judge it too quickly like I did
  • sixfootsex
    Thanks for the review!
  • darkkitty
    Nice review!
  • pinkzombie
    Great review!
  • Ivy Wilde
    I especially appreciate the info on how well the suction cup works. Thanks!
  • Kdlips
    Good review.
  • Rey
    interesting product, thanks for the review!
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