Advanced master gauge - vacuum penis pump by Cal Exotics - review by Starlight Requiem

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I want to up!

I'm not an expert on pumps, but this one seems to be built solidly. Its powerful suction is more than enough to make your cock stand up and salute. The lack of documentation is a strong red flag, however. If you do get this, I want to urge you now to spend some time with Google and learn everything you can about using penis pumps. There are websites available with pumping techniques and tricks from those who have been using them for a while. Don't just rip open the box and start going at it.
*Powerful suction
*One-Handed Usage
*Design Flaws
*No documentation
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review
I'll admit it freely, this is the first penis pump I've ever seen, or tried, outside of the ones on TV. I was a bit skeptical about them being able to make you bigger. And when I got the item, there were a few warning flags.

The box is rather large, and has a decent picture of the pump. All of its virtues are extolled in easy to read lettering. It's easy to read, premium suction, "hi-tech design" ( can feel like the man of the future while a machine sucks on your penis?), and other things, such as the donut on the bottom of the pump, that is removable.

The back of the box features arrows pointing to various parts of the pump, telling about each of them. Important to note are of course the size of it. Of course, there are warnings in a small square on one side. These warnings are mirrored on a slip of paper found inside the box with the items.

Some of the warnings are typical generic stupidity. Stop using it if it starts to hurt. I found one warning to be rather humorous. Misuse of a vacuum pump could result in swelling of the penis. Honestly...isn't that why we are using the pump to begin with? The wording could be a little better on that one.

Some Assembly Required
It's kind of funny how that isn't listed on the box. Not that it's difficult to assemble. The hose and pump handle came together in a soft sleeve of a foam material, and the pump cylinder came in a separate sleeve. Assembly is easy, of course. Just jam the hose onto two little tips on either of the pieces. One thing to note is on the pump handle, the part that moves to suck out the air, has a little round piece on it. (The best I can say is to look at the picture on the back, where you hold the pump to work the "ergonomic one hand action," the arrow on that points to the area.) This little round piece screws onto the main part of the handle, and the pump action slides up into it. The problem? It keeps coming unscrewed on its own. So check that before you start. It is a pain to have to stop and screw it back into place.

I also have some reservations about the design of the pump. First the clear cylinder has markings on it, so you can measure yourself. But they are clear just like the cylinder, making them hard to read. And despite the cylinder being "over 9 inches" in length, the markings only go up to 8 inches.

The PSI Gauge goes up to 76 cmHg (no idea what that means,) and with the silicone donut in place (which hindered my usage of the product,) I could barely get to 10 before it hurt. Without the donut I was hitting 20 before I knew I was at my upper length. I honestly can't imagine anyone being able to take it as high as it goes. But then maybe I was supposed to be reading the red numbers, which only go up to 30. There is no real documentation here on what the numbers mean. Which is one of the warning flags.

Honestly, this is a seriously harmful product. A person could inflict permanent injury with this, yet there is no documentation on how it should be used, or even tips or techniques. I had to visit Google and do a search on "how to use a penis pump" to learn about it. Some of you are probably going..."It's a penis pump. Insert penis. Pump."

And sure, at its most basic, that is what it's for. It does briefly mention using a water-based lubricant for "maximum pleasure." But that just makes it sound like people are using this like a pocket pussy. Not really what I thought pumps were for. It would have made more sense to say use a water-based lubricant around the base of your penis, so there is a better seal and the suction works better. Which I found online.

Also online are techniques such as milking, which I thought sounded kind of important. I mean, if you've never seen a penis pump or heard of how to use one, out of those reading this now, how many would think to just pump it and let it sit? Milking is a means of allowing the pressure to stay, but also to help new blood enter your penis. So it's not just the same blood at that spot, getting starved for oxygen, and probably doing damage.
(continued from Review)
Of course, the one main warning flag that caught me was still about the no documentation on how to use it. Pumping should be done slowly to allow the pressure to increase. Lest we forget the man in Deuce Bigolow that made his penis explode from pumping too rapidly with his.

(My Experience)
In all, I knocked stars off of this product, because frankly they did not put enough effort into keeping the consumer safe, or in helping them use the product. While it's design is mostly good from what I can see, there are a few design flaws such as the clear markings or the piece that keeps unscrewing, that detracted from the pump on the whole.

I felt that a 3 out of 5 was more than enough. If it had proper documentation, it would have been a 4 or possibly a 5.

The one thing I noticed is that the silicone donut is kind of a bad thing. It tended to shrink up around my cock while I used the toy, making it hard for me to achieve my full length. It was much better when I popped it off and used the pump. With the donut I got about 5" total, but without it I was hitting 7", and probably twice the girth.

From here I can only urge caution in using this. It has amazing potential as a BDSM sex toy for a dominatrix or female sadist to use on a male, so long as things are done properly and safely. And of course there is the use for those with erectile dysfunction, which I'm sure the powerful suction will work more than well enough for that. As far as increasing the size of your penis on a permanent basis, it might, but from what I read online, it'd probably take several months of using it on a regular basis. (Just don't use it for more than 20 minutes at a time!)
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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My Advanced master gauge tags
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Cbt
    • Foreplay
    • Gag gift
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Bedroom / on a bed
    • Play party
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Genitals
This review was edited by
  • Brandon Brandon
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Do you like this review?
  • js250
    Great review--thank you very much!!
  • Sabrina
  • Incendiaire
    Great review. It was really interesting to compare your experiences with it. Thanks.
  • MK434
    Great review!
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