Samurai vibrating pump - penis pump by Cal Exotics - review by Lovin' The Toys

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Not a Samurai I would want to guard me!

Unless you can figure out a way to rig some kind of a silicone like actual donut, or some super seal, this is not going to be fun for you. It is not very adaptable to different situations, but perhaps it wasn't meant to be.
Can't say a lot positive about this pump, sorry. Easily cleaned?
Uncomfortable, no suction, basic vibe, laughable tongue.
Rating by reviewer:
useful review
I got this toy, thinking my man would be game for something new. And he was. Simple instruction came with the pump. They weren't really needed, as it's just 2 batteries and pretty hard to mess up. The clear Lucite tube seemed pretty standard. For those men who are over-endowed, I can say it's going to be too small for you. It's not that it's tiny or anything, but it's purpose is to enlarge, and I just don't think it's that huge.

The description says there is a "flexible latex donut." This is not exactly right. It is a round piece of latex that is stretched over the end of the tube. It looked like they dipped the tube in a vat of latex. It is removable, which is good for cleanup, and the inside of the donut is smaller, meant to create an airtight seal around a penis. It is flexible / stretchy, it is latex, and it is in a donut shape, but that is all. It was ostensibly to make the tube seal better, and presumably feel better. It does neither.

The tube has rather poor suction, and has to be practically embedded in the skin to get any kind of a seal. In this case, pain is not conducive to eroticism. We used plenty of lube, cream, oil, you name it, we tried it. The inflatable tongue is just silly. It inflates when you have the suction high, but as the suction lessens, which it does quickly, so does the tongue.

The only slightly positive part of this pump is the vibrator. It is just a standard twist top vibe, so positive is really not that great. It has no pulses, throbs, etc, just a buzz. It's alright, just not special.

After the BF got done playing, I decided to try it myself. Okay, so I had that thought in mind the whole time. This isn't the right thing at all for nipples. Unless you want half of your boob sucked up the tube. I have pretty big boobs, and this sat just around the outside of the areola. When it sucked, it hurt more than anything else. For me personally, I would either want a small nipple sucker, or a larger, whole boob pump.

Next body part, below the equator. This was met with slightly more success. The design problem of the tube still creates issues. It just doesn't hold a seal, anyplace, enough to actually get a pumped area. If you try to put it around your vagina, there are enough valleys, crevices, and fun dips that keep it from getting any sort of seal at all. So moving up, I tried for around the clit and inner labia. Again with the crevices. The slit of your body is just too much for the non bending, hard cylinder to handle. The one place I got even a little suction was when I literally pulled apart my labia, and put it over my clit, and over the inner lips, and above the actual vaginal opening. Almost too much work for the minor amount of suckage I got.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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  • Kayla
    That box is just creepy. Thanks for the review, though. Smile
  • Lovin' The Toys
    Yeah, not-so-subliminal stereotyping.
  • ......
    Thanks for the review.
  • DixieDoo
    good review : )
  • VanillaFreeSex
    thanks for the review, currently comparing similar items for next shopping cart
  • Blooddragon
    Thank you, you helped me decide not to buy this!
  • Mr. Poopy Pants
    Thanks for the review!
  • oldman
    This review talked me out of trying this pump. The ones I already own are pretty good.
  • Britt&Daniel
    thanks for the review
  • billybobtoy
    great review
  • Darklyvan
    Nice review, sorry i accidentally clicked the somewhat spot
  • LilShae
    thanks for the review
  • Fun with Dick & Jane
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