Passionista - erotic book by Collins - review by Opal

If you enjoy an intelligent examination of modern sexuality and its issues, Passionista will satisfy. Ian Kerner, a sex therapist and author of She Comes First (incidentally, Passionista was originally titled "He Comes Next"), starts out with a description of a clever scientific study where men crossed either a safe and stable, or shaky and rickety bridge. In the middle of the bridge was a pretty woman who would give her phone number after administering a survey. Men who met the woman on the shaky bridge were much more likely the call the woman and ask her on a date. Kerner goes on to talk about how a woman can use this information to her advantage by putting her man on the metaphorical shaky bridge to excite and arouse.

The first section of the book is the obligatory look at the male anatomy, but I was pleased to see Kerner adding that the male experience of sex is often TOO physical, and that women have the power to bring it to an emotional and psychological level. He details the cycle of sexual response, and takes a deeper look at the issues of desire and fantasy.

The subtitle sounds good: "The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man." But honestly, even empowered women get caught up in their heads. Kerner uses the familiar question and answer format to address the insecurities of women and men, which makes a nice lead into his honest and thorough answers.

The second part of the book provides techniques and ideas that don't read like your average sex guide. Kerner provides more follow through that that helps women (and their men) experience sex in a more holistic way. I'm especially fond of chapter 10, where women describe sexual activities that have been pleasurable for them, and Kerner then backs up their experience with the why-it-works point of view. I love that whenever Kerner says, "Do it this way," he immediately follows it up with the "because..."

I'd recommend this book to those with a passion for knowledge and a desire to delve deeper into the whys and hows of the male sexual response.