How To Have a XXX Sex Life - book by Regan Books - review by Librarian

How To Have a XXX Sex Life

Book by Regan Books

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Recommending this to anyone who will listen

If you've NEVER read a sex life improvement book before then this is a great book! You'll find lots of new ideas (from mild to wild), video suggestions, and good solid information to keep you interested. This is a fun book and worth putting into your personal collection.
Fun, easy-to-read, notes the importance of communication
No info for larger lovers, photos are cheesecake, no appendix for further info
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review
ABOUT: 240 pages. Published 2004. Color photos of Vivid Girls.

This book is geared more towards women, though some information for men can be gathered. This is about improving an heterosexual sex life.

The intro says, "This book is about taking your own sex life to a higher level, to a place where inhibitions fall away and creativity and a sense of adventure flourish." I agree.

The chapters are sprinkled liberally with quotes from Vivid Girls and male porn directors.

WHAT SOME FOLKS MAY FIND A NUISANCE: Because this is a book produced by Vivid there are marketing mentions of videos and other products. However, this is tastefully done and the DVD mentions are useful because the techniques/positions recommended are tied into a video where that action can be seen, which is great for visual learners, and ideal for someone interested in porn that features that action.

GENERAL INFO ABOUT THE CHAPTERS: Throughout there is "Vivid Girl Favorites" in which the Vivid girls featured answer a question or make suggestions. For example: What's the sexiest part of a man? or "Vibrators We Love."

Vivid girls are profiled and color photos of the Vivid girls are featured in the middle of the book (no explicit nudity). The Vivid Girls are: Jenna, Tawny, Briana, Dasha, Mercedez, Sunrise, and Savanna.


PORN PRIMER: This introduces the idea that porn is prevalent in current society and that it's not quite the taboo subject it used to be given that it's spoken about on TV and radio. Recommendations are made on directors and porn videos for a woman's point of view.

PREPRODUCTION: This chapter discusses how to get yourself ready and feeling sexy. Taking care of your body is absolutely essential whether it's primping (like getting your nails done) or just being clean!

LIP SERVICE: Here we focus on what we can do with our mouths like exploring new erogenous zones (behind the knees, inner elbow, ear-nibbling); kissing; even talking dirty.

ADJUST THOSE HEADLIGHTS: Yup, we're learning about breast play here. Also it suggests paying attention to your man's nipples, which is something I learned over time to do because they were there but never got any attention!

GOING DOWN (ON HER): Basic techniques, body positions, and tongue play are discussed.

GOING DOWN (ON HIM): Basic techniques, body positions, and tongue play are discussed. It discusses gag reflex a bit and that going down on him doesn't mean all-mouth, but using your hands is good too. Most importantly: be into what you're doing, enjoy it because it pleasures him, and communicate with him.

GIVE THAT LOVELY LADY A HAND: This chapter discusses lubricants, g-spot stimulation, and teasing with your hands. The focus is on masturbating her with your hand and fingers.

KNOCK ON WOOD: Similar to the previous chapter except for men, this chapter discusses using your hands, cockrings, ways to get him "up", and playing with his balls. This also offers the important reminder: LUBE THE POLE--use your saliva or his favourite lube.

SHAG TAG: This chapter is dedicated to sex positions--from how to get into sex positions, what's stimulated for her and him in certain positions, and what you can do while in these positions (accessing your clit or his balls, using toys, etc.)--and I can see wanting to check the videos to understand what this looks like.

BEND OVER BABES AND BOYS: Anal sex and play. This chapter suggests positions for anal sex, besides the standard on-all-fours position, that are easier/gentler for first-timers. A guy can like having anal sex performed on him with a strap-on or dildo and it DOES NOT make him gay.

THE MONEY SHOT: This is about learning how to make yourself last, women squirting, multiple orgasms, timing, and ejaculating on body parts. This is a good chapter for those folks who don't understand quite how their bodies work and want to understand their pleasure and their partner's pleasure better.

TOYS AND TRINKETS: Like the title says, this chapter focuses on the toys and what-nots to pleasure yourself, each other, whether alone or together. From vibrators and dildos to piercings and clamps. They do discuss keeping toys clean and safe.

MIXING IT UP: About role playing. Communication is key!

PUSHING THE ENVELOPE: This chapter skims over light bondage, fetishes, wax play, and adding another partner to the play. Again, communication is key!

A STAR IS PORN: Here the focus is on filming yourselves while going at it and the reasons why you might want to, whether critiquing and learning from each other or having masturbation material.

APPENDIX: BEHIND THE SCNES: The directors who have been interjecting tips and quotes throughout the book are more fully introduced, but without photos. Information on keeping safe from STDs, infections, etc, and using condoms, oral sex barriers, and rubber gloves.
Being open to experiences, from mild to wild, is key for a sexy reinvention of your relationship: human beings thrive on stimulation and change. Also, what better way of growing within your relationship than learning new things or doing new things with each other!

VERDICT: This book is very interesting. I've never read an sex-life improvement book before, and this one kept my attention. It's fun to read, sexy, and has given me some new insights and ideas that I can't wait to try with my partner. There's even things about my own body I'd not considered touching myself or asking my partner to try. For example, he loves going down on me but he's never sucked on my clitoris...I never thought about it before and now I'd like to see what the sensation is like. Same with nipple clamps (light ones). I've never been a great fan of breast play, but maybe it's because I'm not getting as much sensation as I'd like, so why not try some toys?The beginning of each chapter features a "fantasy file" in which a porn dvd scenario is written out to enhance the chapter and encourage some fantasy fodder.

WHAT I FOUND DISAPPOINTING: My partner is, frankly, obese and I would've really loved to have learned some information on larger folks--like what positions might work best for them, how their body weight might affect their sex life (physically as well as emotionally), and how to work with what you have. It's clear that certain positions are just not going to happen because of his stomach getting in the way, and until he loses that weight, I'd like to learn what positions we can do and how we can spice up our sex life regardless! ON THE PLUS SIDE: Despite this minor disappointment, I'm eager to do more research into sex lives for larger folk, hopefully it's out there, and see what I can do for us.

I also was disappointed at the lack of further information like websites or further reading that could be useful; also, there could've been more discussion on light bondage, anal play, etc.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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  • krystalmarie
    thanks for the review
  • skyler1
    great review
  • Jordan B
    Great review! Thanks.
  • Librarian
    Thanks y'all.
  • Penguin
    Sounds good. thanks
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