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Oral Sex: How are you at receiving?

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Many men and women report oral as being their favourite sexual act, if not at least enjoying it quite a bit. Oral sex is one of the most common ways of being able to make a woman orgasm, as it gives her partner much more control over the type of stimulation and the exact spots to hit to pleasure her.

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Cunnilingus is one of a few sex acts that's become a litmus test: if you're a woman and you don't like it, the first place people go is: oh, well, you must have problems. You must not like your body, or you must have conflicts about sex.

I don't.

It took me a long time to own the fact that there's nothing wrong with me: it's just not my favorite thing. I rarely come that way, I don't enjoy staring at the ceiling, and there are about a zillion sex acts I'd rather do.

I do have one sex partner who really, really loves it, however, and feels really deprived when I don't let her go down on me. So? I let her, and occasionally, with her, I do now come that way.

Still, sex acts shouldn't be used as litmus tests. You can not like being the receiving partner for oral and be Just Fine sexually.


Also, I think your choice of illustration for this one is very amusing.


Thanks for acknowledging this. As a woman who is very comfortable with my sexuality, a lot of people struggle to understand why I don't like cunnilingus.

I LOVE giving fellatio. I've even brought myself to orgasm just by giving fellatio, and it's something that I fantasize about frequently... and that's probably the only reason why I've tolerated someone giving me cunnilingus before. I understand that sometimes other people like to give oral too.

But honestly, I'm happy with my body and love attention. I have no problem with how my vulva looks or smells. I don't think it's dirty. If anything, I think mouths are pretty dirty and I'm not a fan of having the remains of dinner transferred from your back teeth to my more delicate areas. But mostly, I just find cunnilingus incredibly BORING and a general turn-off. It will make my orgasm go away rather than bring it on. Tongues are neither fast enough nor firm enough to get my clit going, and they only end up feeling annoying. It's like trying to give someone a back massage with a limp lettuce leaf - for heavens sake just get your thumbs in there and stop messing around!

Yes, I know most women love receiving it, and a lot of people like giving it too. but if you're going to try, at least give me something to suck on so that I can stay horny.


I enjoy receiving it, but it pretty much never makes me orgasm. As a brief part of foreplay, it's fine, but I would rather do other things. Unless of course the goal is to just tease me, then it makes sense. Giving is fun too. I feel awkward with other lady parts, because I'm not as experienced with them though


I love receiving, and even if I don't orgasm that way with my partner, it's still a fabulous sensation. I usually don't always orgasm that way because I'm stressed with worrying how long it's taking me to take to orgasm, if I taste ok, smell ok, if he's stimulated. But then, I think of it the other way around, that sometimes he doesn't smell perfect or always taste like vanilla frosting, and I may get a bit bored with it, but I LOVE to do it FOR him and always will.


It's nice to hear I'm not the only one that just doesn't care for it, not because I'm embarrassed or worried just because I don't care for it. It's just not enough stimulation or sometimes too much. I love giving head though it's my fave thing to do which of course my hubby doesn't mind I've came from being eatin out a couple times while in 69 position, and we've been together for 10 years. it's not because he hasn't tried it's not because there's something wrong with me it's just not my thing. It definitely helps to hear other women feel the same


Thanks for all the comments, everyone. Really interesting stuff to read through! I just wanted to mention to Librarian- please don't worry about how long it takes you to reach orgasm sometimes. Women on average take 20-30 minutes to reach orgasm with a partner. Instead, just enjoy it and know that your partner is loving what they're doing and are in no way trying to rush you to orgasm. When you start to worry about things instead of just staying present in the sexual activity, it's called "spectatoring" and it prevents you from being able to reach orgasm as well as detracting from the experience overall.


This is one area Im super confident in . Hubby loooooooooves to give it and I loooooove to take it. Match made in haven,


I really enjoyed reading this because to be honest I was never really comfortable receiving oral but I felt fine giving. My mind would always drift to thoughts of what if it smelled or looked weird. I would never be able to orgasm because I was thinking too much and could never just enjoy it. I eventually just stopped asking for it and if my man offered I just said no. After reading this it totally changes my opinion. I guess I will have to go back and give it a try. :-D


also, performing cunnilingus can be very pleasurable. My girlfriend and I (I am a woman) both don't tend to orgasm from oral sex, or even receive a huge amount of pleasure, but we both really like going down on each other. So, there's that to keep in mind as well.


loved the article


Great Read!


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