Coming up with a safeword

Contributor: mailroomorder mailroomorder
How do you come up with a safeword that you know you won't accidentally say/say very often.
07/16/2013
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Contributor: Love Bites Love Bites
Quote:
Originally posted by mailroomorder
How do you come up with a safeword that you know you won't accidentally say/say very often.
You can make up a strange word that wouldn't be said in normal course of sex "tomato" "banana" "Flying Saucer" etc or you can go with a basic safeword method- Red, meaning stop. Yellow, meaning slow down. Green, meaning go. My partner and I couldn't be serious enough about the words we chose, so we just use the basic R/Y/G
07/16/2013
Contributor: emilymileena emilymileena
That's all very dependent on the vocabulary you use day to day. It would be silly for me to use something like "pencil" when I'm a student. I use R/Y/G, but I know people who use things like "dalmatian" or "kumquat" because they never find use for those words in day to day language. Besides, there's no other reason you'd be yelling those in bed, which is sort of the point. It's distinct.
08/02/2013
Contributor: Bill220 Bill220
We aren't too creative, we use "stop".
08/02/2013
Contributor: mailroomorder mailroomorder
Quote:
Originally posted by Bill220
We aren't too creative, we use "stop".
As long as it works! Creativity isn't necessary.
08/02/2013
Contributor: CedricMordrin CedricMordrin
Quote:
Originally posted by Love Bites
You can make up a strange word that wouldn't be said in normal course of sex "tomato" "banana" "Flying Saucer" etc or you can go with a basic safeword method- Red, meaning stop. Yellow, meaning slow down. Green, ... more
I second Love Bites on the use of the Red/Yellow/Green system.

It's nice to have a warning and cease notification. As with all things BDSM and safety discuss it with your partner so that y'all are on the same page.

Yellow can be back/slow down, just don't escalate any further, or a pause is needed.
Red usually is a complete cessation of all activities and for some partners they immediately initiate aftercare and are done with the scene.
08/04/2013
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
Either something that's random (like window) or something that would get their attention (like lawsuit).
08/04/2013
Contributor: matry matry
My partner and I also use red/yellow/green. First of all I like that it's easy to remember the sequence, stop/slow down/go. If we were to assign random words to those meanings, I feel like it would be easier to get them mixed up ("waitaminute, does piranha mean slow down, or stop?!"). But furthermore, I was previously in a bad relationship where I felt uncomfortable speaking up during sex and felt somewhat taken advantage of. So if I were to ever be in a situation where feelings and memories of those experiences were triggered, R/Y/G are words that are more comfortable to say, making it easier for me to speak up (especially because that's when it would be most important to use them!).
08/09/2013
Contributor: lalalalove lalalalove
Quote:
Originally posted by mailroomorder
How do you come up with a safeword that you know you won't accidentally say/say very often.
Red/yellow/green is always pretty easy.
08/15/2013
Contributor: cmm cmm
We chose jalapeño.
08/29/2013
Contributor: themonstersmate themonstersmate
Still looking for our perfect safeword. In the mean time we use the RYG system.
08/30/2013
Contributor: Sonny Sonny
My partners and I always use "safe word" now because it's pretty impossible to forget, and it really would never come up unless you were thinking you needed to use it. Other than that, words that you're certain would never be in the context of your scene would be good (ex: taxidermy).
09/21/2013
Contributor: Miss L Miss L
Quote:
Originally posted by mailroomorder
How do you come up with a safeword that you know you won't accidentally say/say very often.
"Universal" safe words in many dungeons tend to be Red for stop and Yellow for slow down.
10/28/2013