Find your local community, find mentors and friends and read good, reputable books (like anything some internet sources are good but not all). Fetlife is a good resource to find events in your area. Events, as TheirPet mentions, aren't always play functions, they can be Munches (meetings at a diner or coffee shop) or discussion groups, etc. My local club has a new member/guest orientation once a month at a coffee shop where they go over what the club offers, events, etc and etiquette and rules. Once you have your bearings a little bit, you can attend play parties, which are a great way to meet new play partners as well learn and see new things. The New Bottoming Book is a great book to help get you started. It has lots of stuff about safety and seeking partners in a safe manner. Remember to practice Safe, Sane and Consensual BDSM or Risk Aware Consensual Kink and KNOW your partners, check them out, get references, watch them with another bottom, before you play. Remember to be respectful of others in the community and learn about event etiquette. And EDUCATE, EDUCATE, EDUCATE yourself.