Scared to use your safe word..

Contributor: TakeHimAway TakeHimAway
Have you ever been too scared to use your safeword?
05/09/2012
  • Treat Her! Gift Set For Women For $69.99 Only
  • Complete lovers gift set
  • Upgrade Your Hands-Free Play!
  • Long-distance pleasure set for couples
  • Save Extra 20% On Love Cushion And Toy Set!
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
I've never put my sub in that position, since I made it clear that was a safety thing.
05/09/2012
Contributor: SMichelle SMichelle
Never. If I'm too scared to use my safeword, I'm playing with the wrong person.
05/09/2012
Contributor: Vanille Vanille
No. If you're too scared you're probably thinking you're going to disappoint your D-type for 'copping out'. You're not. Safewords are there to protect you. A well-minded D-type would WANT you to use your safeword so they know they're not pushing your limits or making you uncomfortable.

And if you're not scared because you think you'd be 'copping out', then you're not playing with someone who makes you comfortable.
05/09/2012
Contributor: xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by TakeHimAway
Have you ever been too scared to use your safeword?
I havent but I had a friend that when she'd use her safeword he'd get upset with her and once ripped out a chunk of hair. She got a restraining order against him but it looks like now they're back dating.
05/09/2012
Contributor: Boyqueen Boyqueen
What SMichelle said - if you're scared to use it, I feel like that's the wrong person to play with.
07/09/2012
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
No. A safeword is there for a reason--to protect all participants of the scene. If you're afraid to use your safeword, you probably shouldn't be scening with that person.
07/09/2012
Contributor: itismedi itismedi
Quote:
Originally posted by TakeHimAway
Have you ever been too scared to use your safeword?
I have NEVER been afraid to use it, BUT it does add some psychological play into the sexual play. It is a power you as an s has, but if you use it, that particular play stops. Honestly though, IMO you should rarely need to use it. Play that requires safe words requires trust. It is not something you should engage in with just anyone. My husband knows me, he knows how hard to push me, he will from time to time check with me, "does that hurt?", "yes", "Do you want me to stop?", "no"...that kind of thing. I have used my safe word before, but that was mainly when we were trying something completely new and neither of us knew the limits yet. If you are afraid to use your safe word, run, don't walk away. While D/s relationships are about control and one is in essence "the boss" everything happening should be with the consent of both parties and enjoyable to both parties. Good luck!
08/11/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Boyqueen
What SMichelle said - if you're scared to use it, I feel like that's the wrong person to play with.
I agree 100%.

A good Dom wants you to communicate and wants to please you, too.

My Man would never want me to be afraid to use my Safe Word. It's a sign of mutual respect. Hell, he has called the Safe Word a few times. It gets intense, sometimes too intense for the Dom sometimes, too.

I think the OP has some talking with her S.O. to do.
08/11/2012
Contributor: Zandrock Zandrock
Nope. What we do is we ask each other our safewords in the middle. We use red, green, and yellow. So if I am doming I ask her is this red? green? yellow? and then she will respond. It is important to check in on your sub/bottom in the middle of a scene. Sometimes it can be hard to know what you like when you are a bottom, and sometimes it is only after something has happened that it feels like to much. This is why it is good to check in and communicate so you can both access the situation. Not just put it all on the sub/bottom
08/11/2012
Contributor: Gone (LD29) Gone (LD29)
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
Never. If I'm too scared to use my safeword, I'm playing with the wrong person.
This, exactly.
08/11/2012