The New Intimacy

What are your hard and soft limits?

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Contributor: Tessa Taboo Tessa Taboo
I ask for several reasons:
1) I'm looking to come up with a list of my own.
2) I'm looking for new ideas

So what are your hard and soft limits? Are there any that have changed over time, from a soft limit, to no limit? Or something you have taken off of the hard limit list?
07/09/2012
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Contributor: Tessa Taboo Tessa Taboo
Quote:
Originally posted by Tessa Taboo
I ask for several reasons:
1) I'm looking to come up with a list of my own.
2) I'm looking for new ideas

So what are your hard and soft limits? Are there any that have changed over time, from a soft limit, to no limit? Or ... more
Anyone?
07/09/2012
Contributor: Gdom Gdom
Just to get the discussion going, here are a few of my hard limits:

-Watersports
-Scat play
-Body modification/scarifica tion

Those are probably the "hardest" of my hard limits; I can't see anything possibly changing those. As for your other question about limits changing, mine certainly have. A few years ago, I probably would have had problems causing bruising, but now I do so happily (always safely and with my sub's enthusiastic consent, of course). Breath play is something else I probably wouldn't have done before but enjoy now (although there are pretty substantial risks, so "extreme" breath play--oxygen deprivation for more than a very short period of time--is still something I wouldn't do). Blood play probably would've been a hard limit for me, but I suppose now it'd be a soft limit. It's not something I've done (and not something my sub is interested in), but if she were, I'd at least consider it. There's a lot more, I'm sure, but that's at least something to get this thread started, I hope!
07/17/2012
Contributor: Madsinner Madsinner
Hard limits=
Scat Play,
Sounding,
Extreme Breath Play,
Furry

and anything wayyyy to dangerous.

Soft limits- almost anything is negotiable
07/17/2012
Contributor: Roz W Roz W
Hard limits: permanent marks(receiving), cutting(receiving), asphyxiation/breath play(giving or receiving), real guns/knives

Soft limits: food play(any), corsets(me wearing), verbal humiliation(receiving)

I like fake knives, other people's butts, and biting/scratching/hitt ing (though I could use more flogging practice). I like "play piercing"(temporary piercings with sterile medical needles), though I'm definitely still not a blood fetishist, and don't really "get" blood fetishism. (I've seen "needles" as a hard limit for some people.) I love dressing up in my own way but would have a problem with somebody telling me how to dress, or assuming that I'd want a submissive or "little girl" role/look.

I am foot-fetish friendly, though I don't share this fetish.
07/17/2012
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
Hard Limits:

- Being forced into being shared or sharing
- Anything mental institution-like (straight jackets, etc.)
- Scat
- Sleep deprivation (I'm crazy enough on a full night's sleep!)
- Rape play
- Belts for hitting

Soft Limits:

I don't really have soft limits? I'm not into golden showers or foot play, but I wouldn't call them limits exactly. There's things that don't float my boat, but I usually file those under "don't want to, but always up for discussion."

Aside from the sharing issues and the scat thing, all my hard limits are my hard limits because they would trigger a very bad emotional response from me due to past trauma or current health issues. I don't see those changing.

I'd say what changes more is who I'm willing to give out that key info to. For example, I'd be interested in piercing play, but only my current partner has ever been made aware of this because he's the only one I've trusted enough with care of my safety to consider it. In similar fashion, he's the only one I've granted extreme amounts of power over me. So more things would be limits with someone I didn't trust completely, I guess is what I'm saying, even though they aren't my *real* limits.
07/17/2012