The New Intimacy

Birthday on Sunday, should my boyfriend be buying me a sexy new outfit for the bedroom?

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Contributor: irishlove irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her lingerie herself or should her man give her some extra money for special occasions (such as her birthday) to buy something to make her feel sexy?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Yes
jay28 , Badass , K101
3  (11%)
No
Beck , Sex'и'Violence
2  (7%)
Other, please explain
MaryExy , Sir , Airen Wolf , Kdlips , Reyes , Jackol , DeliciousSurprise , indiglo , Dusk , kelaaa33wish , SiNn , emiliaa , ily , unfulfilled , geliebt , Claire de Cerises , Collogue , Kissy , Squidget , dhig , Falsepast , SMichelle , F1akaLuvsE.F
23  (82%)
Total votes: 28
Poll is closed
06/15/2011
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Contributor: Sir Sir
No person "should" do anything. It would be nice of him to buy you lingerie if you like that, but I think that you'd need to tell your partner that you would like it if he did. Some people are afraid to do such things because some individuals do not like to have lingerie or clothing purchased for them.
06/15/2011
Contributor: MaryExy MaryExy
I don't have anything against the woman buying lingerie on her birthday... If that's supposed to be your birthday present, it would be a bit odd for you to use your money. But if he's getting something else instead, I don't see the problem.

I buy my own lingerie all the time...
06/15/2011
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
Depends on the dynamic of the relationship! No one "should" do anything...In my relationships it would be very insulting if my guys gave me money to buy lingerie on my birthday but that is our dynamic. I buy lingerie for myself and they are ok with that, both would prefer to skip the lingerie and just get nekkid anyhow...
06/15/2011
Contributor: Kdlips Kdlips
i this he should take you out
06/15/2011
Contributor: irishlove irishlove
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
I probably shouldn't have used "should." I like dressing up and I buy lingerie just because I feel like it. It makes me feel sexy. When I posted this I didn't mean that my boyfriend going out & picking something for me and bringing it home for me to wear. I'm curious is other feel it appropriate for the man to maybe offer to take his girlfriend out and get her something sexy for her birthday or just giving her some extra cash for her to pick something out and surprise him with something he'll just want to rip off!
06/16/2011
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
I don't expect my partner (I don't date men.) to do anything for me that she is disinclined to do. If she wants to buy me roses, she should buy me roses. If she wants to buy me high heels, she should buy me heels. If she doesn't have the inclination to buy me anything, that's what she ought to get.


See, the thing is... I don't want my partner to do anything for me because she thinks there'll be a repercussion for her not doing it: that's manipulation. I want her to do it because it makes her happy to do so, not because she thinks I'll be unhappy if she doesn't.
06/16/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
It depends. My man has (from time to time) asked me if I would be willing to wear a certain, specific costume. If I'm game, he'll get it for me. But if I'm out and see something pretty that catches my eye, I'll buy it to wear for him.

I think this is one of the dangers of putting too much emphasis on certain days, like birthdays or holidays. Then there's worry about who should buy what for whom. However, if you feel like you would like him to get you something sexy for your birthday, just tell him. If he's anything like my man he's just waiting for you to tell him what you like/want so he can do it for you! And that way there's no wondering or worrying. Otherwise, buy what you want when you want, and rock it!
06/16/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
I don't expect my partner (I don't date men.) to do anything for me that she is disinclined to do. If she wants to buy me roses, she should buy me roses. If she wants to buy me high heels, she should buy me heels. If she doesn't have ... more
This is pretty much exactly how I feel with my husband, that he should do it because it makes him happy to do so, not because he think's I'll be unhappy if he doesn't. Sometimes I think you and I share a brain, DS.
06/16/2011
Contributor: kelaaa33wish kelaaa33wish
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
No person "should" do anything. It would be nice of him to buy you lingerie if you like that, but I think that you'd need to tell your partner that you would like it if he did. Some people are afraid to do such things because some ... more
ditto
06/16/2011
Contributor: SiNn SiNn
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
I think you two should pick out something sexy together
06/18/2011
Contributor: emiliaa emiliaa
I'm not the type of person who would date someone who's into lingerie. LOL. I have nice underwear but I buy it myself, and not for special occasions. just for daily wearing, for myself. I find the whole concept very unfamiliar.
07/27/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
That's more for him unless it is one you really want.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Sex'и'Violence Sex'и'Violence
Sounds like more of a present for him.
08/05/2011
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
I love lingerie so if you're like me and it's something you want then it is nice, but otherwise if you're doing it for him then you shouldn't do that it's your birthday. Is that what you want to be buying for your birthday?
09/24/2011
Contributor: geliebt geliebt
I think lingerie is a great gift, but like others have said it really depends on your specific relationship and what you both like and want.
11/30/2011
Contributor: Claire de Cerises Claire de Cerises
I think people have said this already, but it is up to you and your boyfriend to figure out together.
01/04/2012
Contributor: Collogue Collogue
If there's something specific he wants to see you in, I think he should treat you. Or you could do the thing I've offered my partner: here's $$, now go to this website and pick out things you'd like to see me wear. But he's so lazy sometimes!
01/06/2012
Contributor: Badass Badass
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
if you think he should, that means he should in your relationship
01/31/2012
Contributor: Squidget Squidget
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
Usually, if my boyfriend really wants me to wear something, he'll buy it for me. If it's something I want, I'll buy it.
02/06/2012
Contributor: dhig dhig
if he can and wants to, sure
02/06/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by irishlove
I went out out today to buy a new outfit from frederick's for my upcoming birthday weekend. I did the same thing a few months ago for my boyfriend's birthday. I'm just curious what everyone else thinks, should the woman be buying her ... more
I would think HE would give for your B-day. I mean if you're buying the lingerie because it makes you feel nice then you're giving yourself a b-day gift, which don't get me wrong, is perfectly fine, but if in order for it to be from him, I'd expect him to give.
02/26/2012
Contributor: only1love only1love
You should buy it yourself cause who says hes gona get something you like.
02/26/2013
Contributor: F1akaLuvsE.F F1akaLuvsE.F
I think it should be your man buying you something special its your day to be spoiled!!
02/26/2013