That is a great idea!!!

I think I'm going to use that next time I need to discuss something with my husband that I'm having a hard time with.

Communicating my wants has always been tough for me.

Thank you!

I agree with the online communication. My fiancée and I have found that we have a lot of kinks in common, but due to norms in society, we don't mention them when we are together. Since I have been unemployed, when he goes to work our conversation have been completely open and ventured into things we would of never thought of sharing with another person purely because we are typing them through im. It feels like being a kid in a candy store for the first time every time, because one of us would so what if, or I came across this article, and the other person would be like oh I was thinking about that last night and I thought it would be cool. When we get together, it is like wow, I didn't think you would like that!!! Our online conversations is another avenue for our communication, and I think making us closer in all aspects not just our fetishes, even though it is definitely helping ;-)

I filled out the 30 days of kink blog challenge, and instead of posting it to a blog, I let my wife read it. Sadly it appears to have made her depressed. I'm very honest in our relationship, and shared some of my darker fantasies. I don't think she was prepared to hear it. I offered her to do the same, but our sexual preferences vary so drastically, I don't imagine I'll have any issues performing her fetishes.

I don't think she realizes (and I plan to discuss it further with her) that I don't expect my darkest of fetishes to be performed. I would enjoy if they were performed, but I don't expect it. They just act as masturbation fodder.

I don't think she understands that for every dark fantasy I want to do with her, I want her to do it back 100% to me. I don't expect her to perform any act that I haven't performed on myself, or that I would be unwilling to have her do to me. My list of no's (waste play, condemnable-philias(zo o,pedo,necro,etc...), diaper/age play) is pretty short though, so it can be tough.

My dark fetishes are the polar opposite of my personality, which I think causes some unsettling feelings as well. The most I can do is talk to her honestly about it, and let her ease into anything that she is willing to do.

You do. But you never really know what the other person is thinking. We like or love a person, and assume them to love us the same way, but they feel these things in their own way.