Bisexual as a "phase" or for "attention"

I saw this a lot while in high school. I never really understood the idea of getting attention for being bisexual. I suppose it generated attention because it was taboo, and bisexuality was a way to "toe the line" without being a total outcast for being homosexual (in my school). I experimented subtly in high school, and I believe I was pegged as a bisexual even though I identified as being hetero during my high school years.

While it is dangerous to assume that all bisexuals are just in a phase, sometimes this really is what is happening. While the attraction itself may not be a phase, the behavior or identity could be. Many people experiment, to figure out what they like, or just for fun. Sometimes gay people will initially come out as bisexual because it is less threatening. While you should never assume that a bisexual person is just experiencing a phase, if it does come to an end, you should accept the identity they are using now.

I get that all the time. People are always trying to tell me what my sexuality is when I know quite well that my attraction to both sexes is not going anywhere.

The people I'm around a lot are mostly bisexuals and like me, not in the "phase" way.

People try to explain and rationalize what they cannot or do not want to understand. The best you can do is be you and if they are open to being educated, then educate them and explain why it is not a phase. Most people don't understand that sexuality and attraction, especially for females, is on a fluid scale and it's not black and white (or male or female in this case). Hopefully someday, educated people will tip the scales and there won't be these misunderstandings or judgements.

i think most people are encourage/forced into a heterosexual lifestyle because of societal norms, when really i think most people are bisexual/pansexual/het eroflexible if they really thought about it and were open to it. personally i thought i was totally straight until perhaps a year or two ago, and i'm fortunate enough to have a partner who understands that as we grow we learn more about ourselves and our preferences. one of the most arrogant things someone can do is tell you what your sexuality is, and i think that's what makes most people think they are totally heteronormative.

as for the whole experimenting phase, i think it's a shame that people think they can only try new things when they are being "dangerous" or it's just temporary. ignore those ignorant people and just do what you feel is right for you in that moment.

I've seen a lot of people use sexuality as attention. there was a guy in my highschool who was Gay; he carried a purse, wore make-up was extremely feminine (then when he got to college dropped all of the make-up/purse carrying stuff) and he was cool 'n stuff - but there was another guy who was also "gay" and was extremely jealous. Soo I'd see one of them (usually Josh) come to school in something nice and then the next day Lee would have something similar and talk shit about him...

Well after Josh graduated, Lee stopped all of his... idk flamboyancy? And claimed he was bi, then he'd be gay again for a while then straight then bi etc. etc etc... and it was something he proclaimed every couple of weeks to the point that I deduced he used sexuality as a means of garnering attention or a reaction from people... or, in a friend of mine's experience, as a way to grope people (mostly girls idk if this is true, he never over-stepped any personal boundaries with me). But I know some people don't really have a static sexuality... but just the whole way he carried himself and acted about it screamed attention attention attention lookit me.

Anyway I don't have much personal experience; I've only ever dated guys but I've been attracted to a girl before and kissed another. I think it had more to do with their personality than the fact they were a girl. I've never really broadcasted my sexuality... for the longest time when people would ask me I'd just answer I was straight; because I'd dated and had sex with men (this was before all this Trans stuff so I guess now I could tell them I'm gay >8)) except now there isn't an answer and I just shrug and say "well I've only ever dated guys but...-shrug- idk"

Even before attempting to look male/masculine I had a lot of people come up and ask me if I was a lesbian or assume such and I've been asked if I was a dyke... and apparently that has different meaning than lesbian? Idk e_e I don't really care about all the terminology... but for the most part people have made assumptions about my sexuality based on my personality / appearance and I make little attempt to correct them because I don't care and because for me it's about the person; and while I definitely favor male bodies I really don't give a shit if they have the type of personality I'm attracted to... and pretty eyes.

I'm evasive to the sexuality discussion because I don't really know how to answer it; because for me there isn't an answer ... it's not really something I think about unless prompted.

i've seen teenagers being bi just for the attention. you could tell they didn't really care for the other person because instead of loving them and spending time with them, they instead spent their time trying to notify everyone that they were "bi" now

I've seen some claim it for the attention. Even admitted to doing it for the attention. Which is annoying cause then it leaves rest of us to be tagged with the "only for attention" label.

i do believe that a lot of people do it for attention or because now its the "cool" thing to do/be for high school kids and such....makes me feel bad for real bi people that get accused of doing it for attention

There were many many girls in my HS that claimed to be bisexual that weren't

*shrugs* People experiment and I think that's a good thing. I do, however, wish people who aren't even experimenting would not use labels just for fun because this is what people end up thinking about the whole group they claim to be a part of.

I know people who are legitimately bisexual like myself. I know people that label themselves as bisexual and I wonder about whether they really are, but it is not my job to label other people or question how they identify themselves. I don't think "pretending" to be bisexual is any better or worse than "pretending" to be straight, although there could be vastly different reasons for these two actions.

As for reasons to label yourself bisexual when it might not be 100% true: Some people feel that taking this in-between step between straight and gay makes coming out easier, like slowly lowering yourself into cold water. Some people might just be bi-curious but they don't know the difference between the two labels. For some people, it is just a phase; there's nothing wrong with that, sexuality is fluid and our preferences can change over time - although it's important to note that it's not like we're choosing to change them, like we woke up one day and said "I think I'll be gay today instead."

You say that you know girls who say they're bisexual but then back off when other girls try to kiss them - this doesn't mean they are just pretending to be bisexual. Being attracted to one sex or another (or both) doesn't mean being ready for physical interaction with them. They might be asexual, aromantic, or have some kind of psychological issues regarding intimacy or their sexual orientation.

That being said, people who truly have no reason to call themselves bisexual other than seeking attention disgust me. They are just giving the rest of the world another excuse to think badly about a group of people who have done nothing wrong, and confusing well-meaning straight folks who are trying to understand our point of view. If they are flirting with the same gender when they are lying about being bisexual, they are leading those people on and that will lead to a lot of hurt feelings and wasted time.

But people who try to tell others that their self-proclaimed orientation is wrong or is just a phase, are just as bad. It's my orientation, it's not hurting you or anyone else, and if I feel like I need to re-label myself a year from now, that's my right! So stay out of it.

I am bisexual and I never did it for attention. I have had relations with both men and women. But did know some who only used it to get attention.

I got NO attention in high school for being bi because all of my crushes were on straight girls. I had no reason to come out cause I wasn't getting any in the first place.

I know "liesexuals" must exist, but I hate it when people treat it like they're the rule and not the exception.

no not at all

I do feel that it is a trend in high school just to look cool or whatever. When you are an adult I think it's normal to feel atracted to both sexes. Personally I only like men as partners but I think a woman's body is beautiful.