Coming out to religious friends?

Contributor: noway noway
I have a few newer friends that I have become close with rather quickly. The only problem? They are hardcore religious (Mormons!). They are pretty young, in their early 20's, and I'm in my early 30's. They are very sweet girls. I don't want to hide my bisexuality from them, but at the same time, I'm not really keen on them trying to "save" me. I doubt they'd tell me I was going to hell or anything like that, but I'm sure they'd feel sorry for me or something. Should I tell them, or just let it go? I'm not actually dating anybody right now, so it's kind-of a non issue at the moment...but at the same time, I feel like I'm hiding it from them. If anything, I think I might have a chance to broaden their minds as to what "non-straight" people are like, since I don't look/act like the gay stereotypes they probably envision. So what do you think, come out or not?
01/08/2013
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Contributor: K101 K101
Why do you feel the need to "come out" to them? Why not just wait until it comes up, if it even does. It's not something you have to share. And if they are your friends, religious or not, they will be totally fine with your prefs! I'm serious. You probably have nothing to worry about. And hey, if they go being judgemental to you, then there's no friendship there anyway & you'd have nothing to lose. Just because you're religious does not mean you have to shun people when you learn they don't do what you do. But then again, I don't know how every religion works, but speaking from Christianity here.

I don't think it's a big deal to worry about going and telling them. Chances are, they probably don't care, so I personally don't feel that my friends HAVE to tell me their preferences. I mean, why do your friends have to know anyway? The way I see it, my friends do not owe me an explanation as to what gender they are attracted to.
01/08/2013
Contributor: KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
I had a religious friend that was super important to me and homophobic. I just was me and she loved me for all of me or didn't. I didn't censor myself, but I didn't rub her face in either.
01/08/2013
Contributor: Pink Kitty Pink Kitty
I had a religious friend, she pretty much said "eff you" and left from my life once she found out I was gay, it wasnt even from my mouth either. She heard it from someone else. That was 3 years ago
01/08/2013
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Why do you feel the need to "come out" to them? Why not just wait until it comes up, if it even does. It's not something you have to share. And if they are your friends, religious or not, they will be totally fine with your prefs! ... more
I agree.

I've read a lot from people who don't identify as straight and this urge sees to exist to come out to everyone. I can understand wanting to claim an identity based on sexual orientation, but isn't there a line between who should know and who shouldn't?

If they don't bring it up, don't bring it up with them. If they come by and you're hanging out with a new same-sex partner, explain if they ask. If they feel creeped out, they'll leave and not come back. That's not your problem; it's theirs.
01/08/2013
Contributor: Hermosura21 Hermosura21
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Why do you feel the need to "come out" to them? Why not just wait until it comes up, if it even does. It's not something you have to share. And if they are your friends, religious or not, they will be totally fine with your prefs! ... more
I totally agree couldn't hAve said it better
01/08/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Hermosura21
I totally agree couldn't hAve said it better
Thirded!
01/08/2013