The New Intimacy

When did you first come out about being bisexual, and how was your first experience?

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Contributor: QSBybakd QSBybakd
I sort of knew I was bisexual when I was 12, but the same year I became involved with a guy in a very serious, long term relationship, and essentially passed my sexuality off as irrelevant / a phase. 4 years later when the relationship ended, however, I started thinking about other girls again, and by this time I was thankfully more comfortable and secure with myself.

It's been a quite while since then, and I still haven't come out (to other girls at least) about being bisexual, nor have I displayed any interest in anyone. Part of it was probably me getting used to being single, but a lot of it is fear. I find myself growing more and more attracted to females, and having little to no sexual experience as a virgin, and none at all with women, I am very nervous. With only one relationship under my belt, I don't really know how to talk to people in a way that goes beyond 'friends'. Let alone how to ask them about their sexuality or find other bisexuals.

So, basically, tell me your stories. When did you know? How did you break the ice? How do you meet other bisexuals, or find out someones sexuality? What was your first experience like?
10/27/2011
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Contributor: QSBybakd QSBybakd
No one?

=/
11/15/2011
Contributor: hem hem
I identify as pansexual now, but I started actively thinking about my sexuality when I was around 13. I told one close friend around that time, then a couple other close friends when I was around 16.
Once I started college, I joined a queer activism group and just sort of integrated myself into the queer community. The experiences of being around so many people who are open about their non-hetero-sexualities and having them assume I'm queer (on the basis that I participate in and organize queer events) made me much more open about my sexuality. I find myself coming out to individual people if they ask me directly (which is pretty rare), or (more commonly) just in casual conversation. For example, if a friend and I are walking along, and they'll mention someone cute, I'll point out a girl I find cute. That usually gets a look or something, so I'll just say that gender doesn't really influence who I like, and that's that. My school being pretty liberal, I haven't been faced with the need to come out to someone who might not accept it.

My advice for meeting other non-heterosexuals would be to go out and join or volunteer for a queer group! You'll usually make some friends through that, and they'll take you to gay places where you'll meet more people : )
10/14/2012