The New Intimacy

How do lesbien women do it??!?!?!?!(dating and finding partners)

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Contributor: Naughty Student Naughty Student
This is not about sex but about dating, and knowing who else is gay.

I had a gay friend and I felt to much compassion for him and frustration when I realised how difficult it must be to find a gay partner. He spoke of the hardships and frustrations with me that he had gone through. I wish it was so much easier for him and all other gay men and women who are looking for a partner.

I was just refelecting on this tonight. How hard is it for gay women to find partners. Has it ever happenned to you that you met this awesome girl and she had a fling with you just becuase she wanted to be with someone gay and then decided it wasn't for her? Is it easy because the woman on woman sexual attraction is a standard expectaiton in night life social circles?

Do you know someone is gay after a few hours with them?

I'm feeling a little sad about this issue and would like to hear from great women how they perceive this dating thing and how it works for them.
07/13/2011
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Contributor: Wild Orchid Wild Orchid
You reminded me of my fave quote from the Lip Service (a great BBC lesbian drama):
Tess: I just...I just do what most lesbians do, stare at women hungrily and pray somebody else will make the first move.

First there were bars now there is the Internet. But somebody has to make the first move (and the second and the third). I'm so like Tess - the only difference is that I behave like that towards men too.
07/13/2011
Contributor: Naughty Student Naughty Student
Quote:
Originally posted by Wild Orchid
You reminded me of my fave quote from the Lip Service (a great BBC lesbian drama):
Tess: I just...I just do what most lesbians do, stare at women hungrily and pray somebody else will make the first move.

First there were bars now there is ... more
Lol, sounds ike a funny show!

It must be scary havignto make the first move, especially if you really like the person you don't want to scare them off. I haven't dated in a long while lol.
07/13/2011
Contributor: anonomous anonomous
OMG I want to know the same thing! Another thing is what if they are not a lesbian and it would be like the only time in the world I make the first move and they end up being like wtf. go away. Id be so embarrassed!
07/13/2011
Contributor: RainbowOokami RainbowOokami
Quote:
Originally posted by Naughty Student
This is not about sex but about dating, and knowing who else is gay.

I had a gay friend and I felt to much compassion for him and frustration when I realised how difficult it must be to find a gay partner. He spoke of the hardships and ... more
Honestly its usually something you can just pick up on (gaydar is our friend) and sometimes you just have to take a chance its not as hard one might think though you do have to be careful in real homophobic places
07/15/2011
Contributor: Ghost Ghost
Everyone, for years, that doesn't know me well assumes I am a lesbian because I tend to have short hair and I don't often wear make-up. So, I get hit on by lesbians a lot. I don't think gaydar works very well. : /
07/15/2011
Contributor: Jenyana Jenyana
My gaydar is rubbish. And I apprently don't send off many "queer" vibes, because most people are absolutely convinced I'm either straight or asexual. Go figures. -_-
07/19/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
this is the main reason i've not had more encounters with women. each of my 4 lady partners have came on to me, and hard. i am SO shy i will fall in desperate love with a female best friend and be TERRIFIED of making a move, and ruining it, of her thinking i'm a freak, that i was into it just for sex all along. i've had 2 girl friends in the past whom the thought of touching them was enough to make me want to cry. so intense.

07/20/2011