Say you're out to lunch with your girlfriend and your waitress happens to have a flattering figure or a very nice behind. Is it okay to check her out briefly? Or should you give her a casual glance and move on?
Is it okay to check out another woman when you're in a committed relationship?
10/26/2011
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None of the above.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
10/26/2011
everyone's got their own fickle rules in a relationship. some people can ignore a glance, where others can justify ending a relationship by doing the same thing. it really depends on who's in the relationship and what kind of boundaries that are established.
with that being said, human beings tend to have a wandering nature (not necessarily straight up cheating, but wandering eyes, for lack of a better term), so it's always good to take this into accountability.
with that being said, human beings tend to have a wandering nature (not necessarily straight up cheating, but wandering eyes, for lack of a better term), so it's always good to take this into accountability.
10/26/2011
Like I care! I'm checking out the waitress, too! Probably pointing her out to him.
10/26/2011
It doesn't matter to me, looking is fine, touching isn't, unless it's fine with the other person.
10/26/2011
I know most people don't mind, but I know it would hurt my fiancee if I was checking out another woman, and the opposite would hurt me.
10/26/2011
I don't mind at all. looking is fine, and touching is fine too, if the other person agrees.
10/27/2011
Everyone looks when something or someone is attractive, so it wouldn't bother me.
10/27/2011
Unless it's repeated checking out of the same person, or unless there is an attempt to do more than look, it's called having a sexual orientation and it's not as if you can't ever experience any kind of attractive appreciation ever again.
10/27/2011
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Ditto!
Originally posted by
WhoopieDoo
Like I care! I'm checking out the waitress, too! Probably pointing her out to him.
10/27/2011
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This ^^ I totally agree 100% with this statement. Each relationship has its own set of boundaries and rules that the people in it establish.
Originally posted by
Kkay
None of the above.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
10/27/2011
It is okay just do not stare. Nothing makes me madder when I see mine staring. It is one thing to look another to stare.
10/27/2011
I say yes, just don't be rude about it. Staring, making comments. If we're out at dinner and I'm all dressed up for you, my guy staring at the waitress and saying "she's pretty cute" while barely having given me a nod would make me feel bad. I "get" that it's natural, but fact of the matter is, it's not polite. Nor respectful.
Every now and then I'll be in the sort of chick-gazing mood where I'll join in the oggling fun, and then it's fine and I'll make it known. Otherwise, keep that sort of longing to yourself. When I'm supposed to be the object of your primary desire, act like it.
Every now and then I'll be in the sort of chick-gazing mood where I'll join in the oggling fun, and then it's fine and I'll make it known. Otherwise, keep that sort of longing to yourself. When I'm supposed to be the object of your primary desire, act like it.
10/27/2011
I check women out more than he does. he thinks it's cute and funny... but i would get pissed if he did, just because he is NOT the kind of guy to A) check girls out or B) hit on them. so that would be out of the ordinary.
10/27/2011
Check them out, fine. Get all flirty, no.
10/27/2011
The policy at our house is look but don't touch.
10/28/2011
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I agree with Kkay. It really depends on the relationship you have with your partner.
Originally posted by
Kkay
None of the above.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
For us, I really don't care if he looks. As long as that is all he is doing.. (look but no touchy! lol)
10/28/2011
We both check out ladies, and for us that's alright. I don't think it's so awesome to suppress a human instinct like checking someone out. Seems to me like that would lead to more strife than it's worth.
10/28/2011
I always take a quick look, but it is nothing more then a quick look.
10/28/2011
Check her out, maybe even flirt but nothing more unless your partner's absolutely fine with it. You're in a relationship, not blind
10/29/2011
We have always had an understanding about this, as long as I am just looking it's all good. Now if I sit and stare, I get a punch/kick to let me know. lol
10/29/2011
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That is what I do to my old man! Only when he stares, which he hardly does but I have caught him.
Originally posted by
ToyTimeTim
We have always had an understanding about this, as long as I am just looking it's all good. Now if I sit and stare, I get a punch/kick to let me know. lol
10/29/2011
It's an important to reach an understanding with your woman that being in a relationship doesn't mean you go blind and stop being attracted to other people.
Whether or not it's ok to act on those attractions is another issue entirely. And blatantly checking someone out is a very low level of action.
Whether or not it's ok to act on those attractions is another issue entirely. And blatantly checking someone out is a very low level of action.
10/30/2011
Everyone looks, it is just a matter of how blatantly and obvious they are about it. I don't care if my husband looks, but there is a point where it would be upsetting. If you act like it is the first time you have seen food after starving for a month, there is a problem. If you check someone out and go on about your business, no problem. This also works with him as well. He doesn't want me to drool and let my tongue hang out when I check a guy out, but doesn't care if I look.
10/30/2011
It's hard to just turn off any and all attraction to other people just because you're in a relationship. I think as long as you're not doing it to an extent that makes your partner uncomfortable, it's fine. My friend used to say "just because you're on a diet doesn't mean you can't look at the menu."
11/14/2011
I think it's understandable to appreaciate the attractiveness of other people as long as it doesn't happen all the time and it doesn't carry any intentions with it.
11/14/2011
yeah as long as you respect your partner that´s not cheating ,,, cheating is when you have another girl without your girl or boyfriend knowing that´s wrong ,,, communication is the key
11/14/2011
I guess it depends on now she feels about it. Are u doing it in front of her and making her feel unworthy bc thats not cool. She needs to know why youre doing it just appreciation etc
11/14/2011
dont let her see you looking
11/14/2011
I was torn between all of the options, but that is because it really depends on the relationship and the situation.
11/14/2011
Total posts: 39
Unique posters: 38
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