Is it okay to check out another woman when you're in a committed relationship?

Is it okay to check out another woman when you're in a committed relationship?

Discreet Lover Discreet Lover
Say you're out to lunch with your girlfriend and your waitress happens to have a flattering figure or a very nice behind. Is it okay to check her out briefly? Or should you give her a casual glance and move on?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, check her out as long as you and your lady have an understanding. You don't want the waitress youre just looking
46  (82%)
No! Completely unacceptable!
6  (11%)
As long as you always come home to her let your eyes wander.
4  (7%)
Total votes: 56
Poll is closed
10/26/2011
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Kkay Kkay
None of the above.

What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
10/26/2011
Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
everyone's got their own fickle rules in a relationship. some people can ignore a glance, where others can justify ending a relationship by doing the same thing. it really depends on who's in the relationship and what kind of boundaries that are established.

with that being said, human beings tend to have a wandering nature (not necessarily straight up cheating, but wandering eyes, for lack of a better term), so it's always good to take this into accountability.
10/26/2011
WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
Like I care! I'm checking out the waitress, too! Probably pointing her out to him.
10/26/2011
GonetoLovehoney GonetoLovehoney
It doesn't matter to me, looking is fine, touching isn't, unless it's fine with the other person.
10/26/2011
The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
I know most people don't mind, but I know it would hurt my fiancee if I was checking out another woman, and the opposite would hurt me.
10/26/2011
TheSlyFox TheSlyFox
I don't mind at all. looking is fine, and touching is fine too, if the other person agrees.
10/27/2011
Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Everyone looks when something or someone is attractive, so it wouldn't bother me.
10/27/2011
Eucaly Eucaly
Unless it's repeated checking out of the same person, or unless there is an attempt to do more than look, it's called having a sexual orientation and it's not as if you can't ever experience any kind of attractive appreciation ever again.
10/27/2011
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by WhoopieDoo
Like I care! I'm checking out the waitress, too! Probably pointing her out to him.
Ditto!
10/27/2011
indiglo indiglo
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
None of the above.

What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
This ^^ I totally agree 100% with this statement. Each relationship has its own set of boundaries and rules that the people in it establish.
10/27/2011
Beck Beck
It is okay just do not stare. Nothing makes me madder when I see mine staring. It is one thing to look another to stare.
10/27/2011
Cherrylane Cherrylane
I say yes, just don't be rude about it. Staring, making comments. If we're out at dinner and I'm all dressed up for you, my guy staring at the waitress and saying "she's pretty cute" while barely having given me a nod would make me feel bad. I "get" that it's natural, but fact of the matter is, it's not polite. Nor respectful.

Every now and then I'll be in the sort of chick-gazing mood where I'll join in the oggling fun, and then it's fine and I'll make it known. Otherwise, keep that sort of longing to yourself. When I'm supposed to be the object of your primary desire, act like it.
10/27/2011
aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
I check women out more than he does. he thinks it's cute and funny... but i would get pissed if he did, just because he is NOT the kind of guy to A) check girls out or B) hit on them. so that would be out of the ordinary.
10/27/2011
Lucky21 Lucky21
Check them out, fine. Get all flirty, no.
10/27/2011
Fun Lover Fun Lover
The policy at our house is look but don't touch.
10/28/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
None of the above.

What is and is not okay depends entirely on your relationship and the boundaries that have been set within it for expectations of conduct and monogamy. There is no one size fits all.
I agree with Kkay. It really depends on the relationship you have with your partner.

For us, I really don't care if he looks. As long as that is all he is doing.. (look but no touchy! lol)
10/28/2011
M121212 M121212
We both check out ladies, and for us that's alright. I don't think it's so awesome to suppress a human instinct like checking someone out. Seems to me like that would lead to more strife than it's worth.
10/28/2011
married with children married with children
I always take a quick look, but it is nothing more then a quick look.
10/28/2011
PassionCpl PassionCpl
Check her out, maybe even flirt but nothing more unless your partner's absolutely fine with it. You're in a relationship, not blind
10/29/2011
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
We have always had an understanding about this, as long as I am just looking it's all good. Now if I sit and stare, I get a punch/kick to let me know. lol
10/29/2011
Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
We have always had an understanding about this, as long as I am just looking it's all good. Now if I sit and stare, I get a punch/kick to let me know. lol
That is what I do to my old man! Only when he stares, which he hardly does but I have caught him.
10/29/2011
Rawhide Rawhide
It's an important to reach an understanding with your woman that being in a relationship doesn't mean you go blind and stop being attracted to other people.

Whether or not it's ok to act on those attractions is another issue entirely. And blatantly checking someone out is a very low level of action.
10/30/2011
js250 js250
Everyone looks, it is just a matter of how blatantly and obvious they are about it. I don't care if my husband looks, but there is a point where it would be upsetting. If you act like it is the first time you have seen food after starving for a month, there is a problem. If you check someone out and go on about your business, no problem. This also works with him as well. He doesn't want me to drool and let my tongue hang out when I check a guy out, but doesn't care if I look.
10/30/2011
mudpie mudpie
It's hard to just turn off any and all attraction to other people just because you're in a relationship. I think as long as you're not doing it to an extent that makes your partner uncomfortable, it's fine. My friend used to say "just because you're on a diet doesn't mean you can't look at the menu."
11/14/2011
Mihoshi4301 Mihoshi4301
I think it's understandable to appreaciate the attractiveness of other people as long as it doesn't happen all the time and it doesn't carry any intentions with it.
11/14/2011
Girly Girl Girly Girl
yeah as long as you respect your partner that´s not cheating ,,, cheating is when you have another girl without your girl or boyfriend knowing that´s wrong ,,, communication is the key
11/14/2011
unfulfilled unfulfilled
I guess it depends on now she feels about it. Are u doing it in front of her and making her feel unworthy bc thats not cool. She needs to know why youre doing it just appreciation etc
11/14/2011
jessi2 jessi2
dont let her see you looking
11/14/2011
mistressg mistressg
I was torn between all of the options, but that is because it really depends on the relationship and the situation.
11/14/2011
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Total posts: 39
Unique posters: 38