The New Intimacy

Do certain things on this site seem not trans-friendly?

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Contributor: gustavadolphus gustavadolphus
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Is it just me, or do certain things on this site seem not trans-friendly? I was looking forward to more bi/trans literature, but there isn't any, and the only really trans-catered things I've found are packers for white transmen.

The forum category is even "transgendered" which is incorrect.

I was directed to this site as a trans-friendly one, but it's been kind of disappointing thus far.
02/03/2013
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Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Yes, but it's a heck of a lot better than most places I've found myself in on the internet. Nowhere is perfect and at least here I usually don't see blatant bigotry given a pass.

P.S. If you're looking for packers for darker skin tones have you checked out the Mr. Right packer on here? It's made from better material than the bright pink ones.
02/04/2013
Contributor: Genderfree Genderfree
As far as education on trans issues goes, the community at EF seems very supportive and educated on the issue. A lot of people don't regularly look up the facts and needs of trans* people; it's simply not a large demographic.

However, I do feel really safe at EF, and although there is a bit of marginalization gender-wise (although usually unintentional and based more off genitals than anything), what I see is usually a case of "well, I just didn't think of that".
02/05/2013
Contributor: FlashFuchsia FlashFuchsia
I don't see why "transgendered" is incorrect. It's possible to change gender identities or have a gender identity that isn't your given gender.
02/05/2013
Contributor: Mediumsizedman Mediumsizedman
Quote:
Originally posted by FlashFuchsia
I don't see why "transgendered" is incorrect. It's possible to change gender identities or have a gender identity that isn't your given gender.
Though your gender is assumed based on the sex you were assigned at birth, you are not assigned a gender at birth. Most trans people would tell you that it's not their gender that has changed or that they are changing, it's their sex.
02/06/2013
Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by Mediumsizedman
Though your gender is assumed based on the sex you were assigned at birth, you are not assigned a gender at birth. Most trans people would tell you that it's not their gender that has changed or that they are changing, it's their sex.
Yeah, this is why I kind of roll my eyes at the word "transgender" at all. I feel like there could be a better word to describe what is actually at hand, but I can't think of one.
02/07/2013
Contributor: LoganAshlee. LoganAshlee.
I see it as.. someone who is transgender is someone who identifies with a gender other than what they were socialised as, and transsexual who medically changes sex.

Trans = opposite. Transgender = opposite gender. Transsexual = opposite sex.

as for lack of transgender erotica... write some!
02/28/2013
Contributor: FieryRed FieryRed
Quote:
Originally posted by LoganAshlee.
I see it as.. someone who is transgender is someone who identifies with a gender other than what they were socialised as, and transsexual who medically changes sex.

Trans = opposite. Transgender = opposite gender. Transsexual = opposite ... more
Trans does not mean "opposite", it means "across"--for example, a transcontinental railroad is one that stretches across a continent. So, technically, "transgender" would mean someone whose gender identity is either fluid or manages to encompass the entire spectrum.

However, I believe the term "transsexual" originated from the word "transition"--movement , passing, or change--combined with the word "sexual", which would give the new word "transsexual" the meaning of "changing sex". So, in that sense, I agree that the word "transgender", meaning one who has changed or is changing genders, would only apply to those whose gender identity HAS changed at some point in their lives, rather than just to anyone whose physical appearance and/or DNA does not match his/her gender identity.
03/14/2013
Contributor: needapacker needapacker
Honestly, life isn't trans friendly and you're just going to have to get used to it. Even if that changes, it fucks shit up for someone. Lack of trans awareness can be good for those who are stealth and bad for those who are out. Making people more aware of transsexualism and the issues associated with it can be good for people who are out but dangerous for those living stealth. It's a no win situation so we're just going to have to adjust.
03/14/2013
Contributor: butts butts
This site is a LOT more friendly (especially being a sex related site) than most sites I've been on that aren't 100% trans related. Yes there's some things that aren't really the best (especially wording wise) but I'm not a super sensitive person and I'm aware that the staff is VERY friendly and accepting, they doesn't mean any disrespect. If you'd like, we can create a thread suggesting to the staff how to make the site more respectful/accurate, there's definitely a few things I'd suggest! They're great at listening and they're already preforming some site maintenance, I bet they'd love to make your experience here more comfortable. In fact, I'll start a thread now!
03/15/2013
Contributor: butts butts
Also the "only trans-catered" items you were referring to are the Mr. Limpy packers, the Mr. Right comes in multiple skin tones and there's more than just the packers that can be used by transfolk. There's also the Feeldoes (especially the Realdoe and Realdoe Slim), Shares (and other double ended dildos), RodeoH brief/boxer harnesses, and a bunch of styles of packing harnesses and the Mr. Right packing strap. I'd say that's a nice selection for a site that doesn't even advertise itself as being a trans gear shop! I am sad that there's not more stuff for transwomen/crossdressi ng males though, I can't tell if there's not many transwomen here BECAUSE EF has so little for them OR if EF has so little for them BECAUSE there's not many traswomen here.
03/15/2013
Contributor: butts butts
link
03/15/2013
Contributor: Roxen Roxen
From what I've seen it seems relatively trans friendly, but maybe that's just because most of the sites I've been on in the past just ignore trans people. I'm aware that it's supposed to be transgender and not transgendered, but so many cis people don't know that...so I don't really hold it against them.
03/16/2013
Contributor: femmepwr femmepwr
While I haven't seen any outright bigotry or transphobia here, and I guess some people might call that friendly, there are things EF could do to be more trans-friendly. Like the fact that all toys made for "women" are made for people with vaginas, and all toys made for "men" are made for people with penises, which equates people's gender with their genitalia and generally erases trans* people.
04/04/2013
Contributor: treehugger treehugger
Yeah, I agree with femmepwr. Plus the "Gender friendly" section (which seems to mean trans* but is actually more just queer stuff in general) is under the "Couples" heading? I'm just not sure why that is.
04/04/2013