yeah but that just straightens it and isnt really a hairstyle. and i need to do it like 5 or 6 times to get it flattened. which takes A LOT of time.

Oh my. Lol bless your heart. Hmm... Know anybody that can french braid, or is it too thick for that? What about going with curls? You could leave it down and use a thin barrel iron to just curl the ends. That looks lovely. Also try a shampoo like Herbal Essence's smooth with possibly a thick conditioner to weigh it down some and give you less poof. You could do the Smooth shampoo and cond. and then flat iron it. It makes a big diff. for my major poof! Lol. You could always do little spiral twists all over your head while it's damp (use a cond. first to help weigh it down) and bobby pin them while you sleep. Wake up, add hair spray and you have nice, smooth curls. You could test this out on just a few strands before the actual date. Also, those cheap foam hair rollers can work wonders! If you twist your hair tightly and sleep on it, they'll be somewhat sleek and not just seriously poofy. I'm not sure just how poofy your hair is though. If you could handle it, flat ironing the night before could be a big help. Straighten then have someone french braid if you don't like the plain straight look. Or find someone who's willing to cut it and give you some sort of style to your hair and possibly thin it? A nice head of curls sounds like a really good way to go.

TIP: A dryer sheet sometimes helps with static and poof. You can also use a deep cond. treatment (cheap at a pro salon store) and leave it in overnight. My twin sister uses deep cond. treatments overnight with one of those shower caps over her head and it'll stay amazingly smooth and shiny all week. It also cuts her time straightening in half. She sometimes just uses a thick dollar store treatment. I don't do this often because my hair gets dry so easily and it looks greasy SOO easily.

I have a super short cut with a tough-to-maintain style so I have to straighten daily. My hair is very poofy, but I have it thinned and the back is super short so that helps. I spend about an hour straightening after showering at night and then anywhere between 15-45 min straightening the next day. Learning what types of products to use and avoid for your hair type will make things much easier. I understand though, that it's simply unmanagable.

Best of luck! Let us know what you decide. Pics would be awesome too!

I have this same issue. My hair is thick, frizzy at times, those little fly aways near my hair line...Drives me bonkers!

I use Garnier Fructice "smoothing milk" I think is what it is called? I wash my hair, towel dry and run about a quarter size dallop of this stuff through. I wait for it to dry or blow dry and straighten with a flat iron AFTER its completely dry.

As far as a hair style, Maybe try to go with something like a half up do with some curly q's coming down? Or...do a half up do with the half up part curled, and the underside flattened? I've done that a few times and it comes out really cute. Not to mention its way less work. and if you want to let your hair down afterwards, its not going to be all nasty with hairspray or gel too bad.