The New Intimacy

How important is the mind in sex?

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Contributor: Kkay Kkay
After reading a thread about how people get off, it hit me that for me, a lot of sexual arousal and pleasure is entirely mental. If I'm not mentally aroused, I have pathetic, weak orgasms. When I'm deep in my head, I come so hard I see stars.

What about you? Is sex really all in the brain, or is it physical?
09/08/2011
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Contributor: js250 js250
Both. I have to be mentally and physically stimulated to have some overpowering orgasms. If I am not mentally on, the orgasm is lighter and not as satisfying.
09/08/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I HAVE to have the brain stimulated first and then the body will follow! Once the brain is sexed up, he is free to just focus on the physical.
09/08/2011
Contributor: Naughty Student Naughty Student
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Both. I have to be mentally and physically stimulated to have some overpowering orgasms. If I am not mentally on, the orgasm is lighter and not as satisfying.
It is the same for I! I need both, a little bit of frolicking to get me interested and a bit of foreplay to get me physically aroused.

If my mind is elsewhere during sex(happens once every 3 years, RARELY!), I prefer to stop. If I can't be present it isn't worth continuing.
09/08/2011
Contributor: PussyPurr PussyPurr
I heartily agree that the biggest sex organ is the brain!
09/08/2011
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
I have to be mentally ready, before I can enjoy the physical part of it.
09/08/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
You bet, I would say for me it is 75% mental. If I am stimulated mentally I can get off pretty easily, same for the wife. If the mental stimulation is lacking it can take forever or never, like if the wife is not that into it.

On the other hand, when the wife wants a good long session it's my brain that goes to work suppressing the urge to come, kind of a mind over matter thing.
09/08/2011
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I think the mind makes up for whatever may be lacking from a partner.
09/08/2011
Contributor: KaraSutra KaraSutra
According to the male and female sexual response cycles mental stimulation is one of the first things we need to become aroused - whether it's visual, a state of mind (being relaxed enough to become aroused) or otherwise, without a mental readiness it's usually hard for people to achieve an orgasm. Aside from that, because we often spend so much time in our heads it can be hard to focus on the body and what we're feeling enough to explore and readily go through the different levels of the sexual response cycle. *Not saying people don't orgasm without it, but that it is a main player in the game.
09/08/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
"Tell me where is fancy bred? In the heart, or in the head?"

I think they both feed off each other. Physicality lights up my mind, my mind primes my body... wonderful positive feedback cycle.

The mind is definitely important, though. The first morning I woke up with my current partner, I gave him a morning handjob+cum on my tits, and even though both of my hands were busy with him, and I there was nothing rubbing on my clit or inside me, when he came, I did too. Completely with no physical stimulation at all. I took that to be a pretty good sign that we were a good match...
09/08/2011
Contributor: frisky069 frisky069
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
After reading a thread about how people get off, it hit me that for me, a lot of sexual arousal and pleasure is entirely mental. If I'm not mentally aroused, I have pathetic, weak orgasms. When I'm deep in my head, I come so hard I see ... more
I agree, if your mind is wandering I don't think you'd have good orgasms. When my husband and I have sex I'm always 100% there in my brain, focusing only on the now with him and enjoying every second of it
02/14/2020