Suggestions needed on how to get my toddler out of my bed!

Suggestions needed on how to get my toddler out of my bed!

shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
shySEXXaddict
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Please help!! I knew it was a terrible thing from the get go but I still did it...I have let my son sleep in bed with me since the day I brought him home from the hospital!His father passed away shortly after having him so its always been a comfort having him there with me.But now I have moved on and started seeing this guy and even though he is extremely understanding it is already getting in the way of our sex lives and even being intimate.It sucks! I try putting him in his crib when he falls asleep but wakes right up and cries until you put him back in my bed!I dont know what to do!The other nite I gave praise to the guy im seeing for dealing with it because in my bed it went me-baby-him.And he HAS to sleep between us or he cries over that too!! I am desperate!Any advice I would greatly appreciate..as I dont the guy Im seeing to get sick of this and walk away.Im starting to fall in love with him.
09/20/2011
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Ansley Ansley
What a frightfully sticky situation. Is your child old enough to rationalize with, yet?
09/20/2011
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
What a frightfully sticky situation. Is your child old enough to rationalize with, yet?
unfortunately not...he's only 19months...I know,I have no idea how to break this habit.And the messed up thing is I knew I would have this issue at some point but still let him!What was I thinking!!
09/20/2011
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by shySEXXaddict
unfortunately not...he's only 19months...I know,I have no idea how to break this habit.And the messed up thing is I knew I would have this issue at some point but still let him!What was I thinking!!
You weren't...you were grieving.

Try taking him into his room at night and pretending to fall asleep with him. As soon as he is out like a light, move to your bed. If he crawls into your bed in the middle of the night, put him back in his bed. If he throws a fit, comfort him and still put him back in his bed. Keep doing it until it becomes somewhat of a routine.

I'm sure other parents will be 'round shortly to offer even more advice. You just have to be strong and believe you are doing what is best for him and yourself.
09/20/2011
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by shySEXXaddict
unfortunately not...he's only 19months...I know,I have no idea how to break this habit.And the messed up thing is I knew I would have this issue at some point but still let him!What was I thinking!!
This is really common. You were doing the best you could to raise your baby after a terrible tragedy.

Teaching a toddler to sleep in his or her own bed is a process, not an event. ALL our kids slept in out bed at one time, we had to gradually teach them to sleep on their own. It is not something you can do in a day or a weekend, and it will only work if the child is ready to sleep on his own.

A stop gap until the baby sleeps in his own bed; you and your new love can go into an other room to make love, after the baby has fallen asleep for a while, until things change. A LOT of parents go through this, and you did nothing wrong by letting your baby into your bed. Children all over the world sleep with their parents until middle childhood. Industrialized countries are the few who don't.

Take is SLOW and easy.

Here's a good website to help you.

link

The Sears' are the best people to talk to about baby and child care. They are my idols, I've learned from them, met them, and gone to many of their lectures. Go to their website and go to Amazon and get some of their books, they will not steer you wrong. They look at things from a baby's point of view, so you know their solutions will be the best.

Here's an other one link
09/20/2011
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
thanx!I will definitely look it to this.And we do go in the other room..its just difficult because I have a 13yrold too and worry about him walking out at nite.so we usually go into my cramped bathroom.lol
09/20/2011
Wildchild Wildchild
Quote:
Originally posted by shySEXXaddict
Please help!! I knew it was a terrible thing from the get go but I still did it...I have let my son sleep in bed with me since the day I brought him home from the hospital!His father passed away shortly after having him so its always been a comfort ...
This is going to sound really mean. Your going to have to start putting him to sleep in the crib. He will cry and it's gonna suck, after a few days or a week he should be broke from the bed.

I have went thru a similar expeirence like this with our son. Sorry to hear about his father passing away.
09/21/2011
AndroAngel AndroAngel
I don't have kids, I have no first hand experience, but from the experiences of those I know, it's acceptable to transition a child out of sharing a bed. According to them, you start by putting the crib next to your bed, then you transition to putting it at the opposite side of the room, and once the child is used to that, then you can move the crib out of the room entirely. It still won't be easy, but it's easier than the alternative.
09/21/2011
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
Quote:
Originally posted by Wildchild
This is going to sound really mean. Your going to have to start putting him to sleep in the crib. He will cry and it's gonna suck, after a few days or a week he should be broke from the bed.

I have went thru a similar expeirence like this ...
Thank you....I know I feel so mean!I tried that and he cried for 45mins straight!! but Im thinking that thats what I gota do.
09/21/2011
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
Quote:
Originally posted by AndroAngel
I don't have kids, I have no first hand experience, but from the experiences of those I know, it's acceptable to transition a child out of sharing a bed. According to them, you start by putting the crib next to your bed, then you transition ...
Ya actually his crib is already in my room and not even a foot away from my bed and he still wants nothing to do with it!!thanx for the suggestions!
09/21/2011
Ghost Ghost
It might be best to just let him cry. He'll get over it.
09/21/2011
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by shySEXXaddict
Please help!! I knew it was a terrible thing from the get go but I still did it...I have let my son sleep in bed with me since the day I brought him home from the hospital!His father passed away shortly after having him so its always been a comfort ...
Awww hun you didn't do a bad thing totally you were grieving and needed the comfort. This is such a common problem that I bet Jo Frost covers it on her website Jo Frost Her technique is to sit by the crib in the dark room without facial or voice contact until the baby falls asleep moving slowy to the door ech night until you can place the baby in the crib and leave the room. I have used the technique and it works quickly and pretty much fuss free.
Good luck, check out the site this woman is AMAZING!
09/21/2011
Beck Beck
When my son was 19months old we moved him out of the crib into the toddler bed. We went all out and got the whole set in toy story. Then when I put it up told him what a big boy he was going to be, made a huge deal about the new bed. Even went and laid in it for a little bit. He loved it. If you can you switch to the toddler bed. Get them one that they would like toy story, dora, tinker bell, cars, or whatever else there is. And do the same, it may just work for you also. The cost of the toddler bed I believe is roughly $50. I got a set at walmart was the bed, table and chairs, and shelf for $130. It was a great investment. Girl ones I have seen cheaper in the set.
09/21/2011
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
thanx...ya i was wondering if a toddler bed would work because its like a normal bed
09/23/2011
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Unique posters: 8