The New Intimacy

What one thing about a person almost always guarantees instant attraction? (That you'll never admit to...)

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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more quirky than others, some are darker things that can't be shared with the person you meet at the bus stop or wherever you happen to be sharing details about yourself with strangers...

So, what's yours? Inquiring minds want to know!
07/22/2013
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Contributor: dv8 dv8
a sex toy fetish
07/23/2013
Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Generally speaking, he/she has to be funny.
07/23/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I've always been really attracted to men with dark hair and brown eyes. But, more than that it seems the people I'm most attracted to have a dark side to them...either by experience or thoughts, nothing like murdering people or anything like that just those who happen to see the really ugly things in life and don't shy away from them. (I don't know if that makes any sense to anyone but me.)
07/23/2013
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more ... more
A domineering personality attracts me like a honey bee...seems normal until you realize I like these types of "bad boys" because I like pushing them around and making them insane...
07/23/2013
Contributor: Thinkingman Thinkingman
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more ... more
An outgoing attittude, friendly, doesn't always look at the negative side.
07/23/2013
Contributor: BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
I usually become attracted to anyone that paid a lot of attention to me. As far back as third grade when one boy came and pushed me on the swingset at recess, I developed a crush on him. So, pretty much I'm attracted to people that are attracted to me.
07/23/2013
Contributor: Bubba29 Bubba29
a woman into strength and fitness
07/23/2013
Contributor: shorejen9 shorejen9
Eyes will get my attention but a hidden commanding personality does me in. I don't go for overly testosterone filled macho men but a man who doesn't need to be that way because he has it in control. That's what gets me. And those are two reasons my DH is my true love.
07/24/2013
Contributor: peachmarie peachmarie
A sharp mind, I tend to be attracted to more "brash" people. Someone who has a sharp wit and mind are always sexy.
07/24/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I'm loving how the answers here are more personality based than on the person's physical appeal. That's awesome.

Is there anyone who avoids certain aspects like tattoos or piercings?
07/24/2013
Contributor: shorejen9 shorejen9
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I'm loving how the answers here are more personality based than on the person's physical appeal. That's awesome.

Is there anyone who avoids certain aspects like tattoos or piercings?
I will admit that a lot of tattoos or piercings (when I was in the dating/hook up field, not anymore as I'm very happily married) weren't a turn off but definitely weren't a turn on either.

Trend hair styles like Mohawks or half shaved with it left long on one side or funky colors turned me off. I had friends like that but they were only friends. Weird I know lol

I tended to avoid the jock types as they were too "peacock like" for me.
07/24/2013
Contributor: wicked48 wicked48
Sincere, funny, outgoing personality.
07/24/2013
Contributor: js250 js250
Taming the 'bad boy'----gets me every time! Even if he ends up taming me down a bit as well, it has been a hell of a ride these last 17 years.
07/25/2013
Contributor: lana'sart lana'sart
Quote:
Originally posted by dv8
a sex toy fetish
I agree
07/25/2013
Contributor: ksmyaz ksmyaz
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I'm loving how the answers here are more personality based than on the person's physical appeal. That's awesome.

Is there anyone who avoids certain aspects like tattoos or piercings?
You mentioned tattoos... I never object to, and even LIKE a small, subtle, artistic tatt- especially if it's a unique, customized symbol! Lately, however, so many very sexy and hot-looking (already!), girls, particularly models and actresses, are getting SO "illustrated" ;- entire major areas like arms, torsos, etc., with visual tableaux- not to mention entire paragraphs of written sentiments... that I've begun to call them (with dismay), COMIC BOOK PEOPLE...
It's also apparent, I think, that none of these folks know, or maybe care, about an irrefutable, inescapable FACT about human biology: Skin, due to a number of factors- AGES, WRINKLES, FADES, SAGS, etc., etc., etc. The vividly colored, and sharply-drawn, work of skin-art that looks spectacular on the taut, tight, flawless skin of a girl in the prime of health, is just gonna look like HELL, down the Road of Life a couple of decades or so, later!
07/27/2013
Contributor: lalalalove lalalalove
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more ... more
Sense of humor and intellect. Physically there are many different things depending on the person's gender and such.
07/27/2013
Contributor: Tigrica Tigrica
Initially, it's their voice. Having a sexy accent helps too. Hehe.
I'm not really into heavy piercings or just a bunch of tattoos slapped together... EG: (On the same arm) Cat here, sword there, cartoon character, a quote too. I don't see the art or creativity in that.

Also, they better love animals.

I'll stop there before I write a whole dating profile. lol
07/27/2013
Contributor: StayceeO StayceeO
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more ... more
personality definitly
07/27/2013
Contributor: Gr8pumpkin Gr8pumpkin
Quote:
Originally posted by StayceeO
personality definitly
While all of my lovers have been dark haired, and on the "plush" side of things, I can not resist a woman who is a bit of a Tom-boy, with the same characteristics. Walking down the street, if there is a statuesque blond and a dark haired, Mary Lou Retton type standing side by side, I will look at the brunette first every time. An engaging personality and being bright is also very important to me.
07/27/2013
Contributor: TransMarc TransMarc
People way shorter than me. Muscular women. Really skinny people.
(And a beautiful face!)
07/28/2013
Contributor: Bubba29 Bubba29
a strong posture is also attractive
07/29/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by ksmyaz
You mentioned tattoos... I never object to, and even LIKE a small, subtle, artistic tatt- especially if it's a unique, customized symbol! Lately, however, so many very sexy and hot-looking (already!), girls, particularly models and actresses, are ... more
I think those people merely enjoy living in the moment and they aren't worried about "old age".
07/29/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by TransMarc
People way shorter than me. Muscular women. Really skinny people.
(And a beautiful face!)
What do you find attractive about really skinny people?
07/29/2013
Contributor: babyrock babyrock
someone who is modest even when there are a million reasons to boast
07/30/2013
Contributor: Eugler Eugler
There are so many different factors
Just to name a few:

grey hair - that's really fascinating

something very individual - if a woman has anything that makes her unique, like a shaved head, mohawk, dressing special, etc... makes me curious.

women who appear very dominant - e.g. I met a conductress who was very strict but I was immediately drawn to her. Or as written elsewhere: Dolores Umbridge.
07/30/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Eugler
There are so many different factors
Just to name a few:

grey hair - that's really fascinating

something very individual - if a woman has anything that makes her unique, like a shaved head, mohawk, dressing special, etc... makes ... more
Oooh the grey hair gets me, too!!
07/30/2013
Contributor: LoveBug721 LoveBug721
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Chemistry can be a tricky thing between two people but there is almost always a certain characteristic, either in personality or appearance, that is similar in the people we choose to be intimate with.

Sometimes those things are a little more ... more
Being Artsy
07/30/2013
Contributor: Happy Kupple Happy Kupple
Personality first................t hen his sensitivity to my sexuality/desires.
08/18/2013
Contributor: peppermintgal peppermintgal
Good sense of humor, nice smile and a deep voice.
08/18/2013