The 'Size' Issue

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The 'Size' Issue

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Contributor: Darling Dove Darling Dove
I was kinda wondering other's opinions on this, so I figured it'd go here <3

So, when I first got into toys I didn't have much of a concept of size and how big was too big. I had one larger vibrator, that ended up breaking (It was one of the classical duets series, air got pushed out of the sleeve and it like 'deflated' and I couldnt pull it off to fix it). I recently replaced that vibrator along with buying some others from the series, but since I hadn't used it in so long and since I'd grown accustomed to smaller toys, they're too big for me now. It's not that it -wont- fit. It would if I wanted it to.
It's just that whenever I use large toys I'm worried about getting loose and having my partner get less enjoyment from when we have -real- sex. I suppose I was wondering if the same things went through anyone elses mind when choosing what toy they should use for their personal time.

And yes, I do kegels, and if I use something large once or twice, within a few days I will be back to how tight I normally am, but if I make it routine, I'll notice that I get generally looser until I stop using it and give myself time to readjust. So yeah... I was just wondering.
10/05/2008
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Contributor: Epiphora Epiphora
I firmly believe you should use the size of toys you want to use. I doubt it will have a huge impact on sex, especially if you do kegels.

I don't have any firsthand experience to offer though.
10/05/2008
Contributor: Nashville Nashville
Your vagina is a muscle, while over the years it will lose elasticity (especially if you've gone through childbirth) it will regain it's shape. Don't stop yourself from using larger toys because you feel as if you're becoming loose because it's just not so... especially if you're doing your kegels.
10/06/2008
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
Quote:
Originally posted by Nashville
Your vagina is a muscle, while over the years it will lose elasticity (especially if you've gone through childbirth) it will regain it's shape. Don't stop yourself from using larger toys because you feel as if you're becoming loose ... more
I don't use larger toys a lot, but to the best of my knowledge, the vagina--being a muscle and all that jazz--will tighten up with regular exercise. I have sex regularly and only do kegels during PIV for my partner's pleasure, and I've never had any "loosening."
10/06/2008
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I don't use larger toys a lot, but to the best of my knowledge, the vagina--being a muscle and all that jazz--will tighten up with regular exercise. I have sex regularly and only do kegels during PIV for my partner's pleasure, and I've ... more
PS: the "loosening" you may feel may just be your muscles acclimating to larger penetration. You're probably just as tight/strong.
10/06/2008
Contributor: Beautiful Dreamer Beautiful Dreamer
Quote:
Originally posted by Nashville
Your vagina is a muscle, while over the years it will lose elasticity (especially if you've gone through childbirth) it will regain it's shape. Don't stop yourself from using larger toys because you feel as if you're becoming loose ... more
Sleeping Dreamer is right. You're vagina will not get "loose" simply from using larger toys. Use whatever you enjoy, small or large.
10/06/2008
Contributor: Cock Wrangler Cock Wrangler
It's all been said. I'd just like to throw this in- I get fisted on a semi-regular basis, and there are no after-effects from accommodating something larger. You're probably just experiencing your body stretching in response to the size of toys, and if anything this will work your muscles more and give you more control.
10/06/2008
Contributor: Darling Dove Darling Dove
Really? I figured if larger toys went in easier then my partner would go in easier too... thus having less resistance and getting less out of it. At the same time, most of the larger toys I have are pains to clean, lol. But I guess this will ease my fears about some of them.
10/06/2008
Contributor: Oggins Oggins
I've had two natural child births and one emergency c-section (total nightmare!) with no noticeable difference in my resulting vaginal size. I do find that sometimes I am looser and others tighter but, I think this might be a hormonal thing but, I'm not sure exactly. Anyway, I have noticed that using larger toys prior to penetration with my partner renders me temporarily a bit looser. I'm never any more loose the next time we have sex. The vagina is very stretchy and resilient so, it bounces back so to speak. If you're doing exercises too then I don't think you have anything to worry about. Good luck and happy playing! =)
10/06/2008
Contributor: Bulma Bulma
My husband's penis is a pretty average girth of 1 1/2 inches diameter. The dildo I use the most is the Lone Star, and it is 1 7/8 inches in diameter. My husband has noticed a difference at all, and still complains I squeeze too tightly. Use whatever pleases you most, the vagina is an amazing organ and adapts very quickly
10/06/2008
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
Really? I figured if larger toys went in easier then my partner would go in easier too... thus having less resistance and getting less out of it. At the same time, most of the larger toys I have are pains to clean, lol. But I guess this will ease my ... more
You may find your partner slides in easier, but this is probably because of your muscle acclimating to larger sizes rather than a "loosening;" IE, it's just as tight, it's just able to handle more.
10/07/2008
Contributor: Bulma Bulma
Quote:
Originally posted by Bulma
My husband's penis is a pretty average girth of 1 1/2 inches diameter. The dildo I use the most is the Lone Star, and it is 1 7/8 inches in diameter. My husband has noticed a difference at all, and still complains I squeeze too tightly. Use ... more
I meant to say that he has NOT noticed a difference at all...sheesh, think I would have caught that the first time.
10/07/2008
Contributor: smurfy smurfy
Personally, I think you should use what feels and works best for you, as long as your partner isn't complaining, then I wouldn't worry about it. I doubt there is going to be that big of a difference anyways.
03/30/2009
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
I use some pretty big toys on occasion, and sometimes my husband likes to use 2. I don't think he's noticed a difference, unless it's maybe right after I use them, but even then it's not a huge difference.
03/30/2009
Contributor: Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
I agree with smurfy. Choose whatever you're comfortable with. Personally, I handle most penetration toys poorly. Slim g-spot stimulators are fine, as are softer, plush toys. Rigid, average-to-large toys, however, hurt. I don't know if it's because I use most of mine in the shower, but they don't feel right. It's funny because my boyfriend is on the larger side of average (sometimes he feels larger than average) and I seldom feel uncomfortable with his length and girth. Toys even close to his size, however, make me feel like I'm punishing my cervix.
03/30/2009
Contributor: readyformore readyformore
I'm glad this was posted an appreciate the replies as well...I just bought our first toy today and had these same concerns but now I can't wait til Wednesday and the package arrives! I think my husband and I are going to be giddy all weekend. Good reminders about the Kegels too, do them often.
04/04/2009
Contributor: Profane Profane
I have both large and small toys (some very). But since I'm not big on penetration, I've gone weeks or months without sex or penetrative masturbation. At that point, regular-sized toys are actually uncomfortable because I'm no longer used to it. You can even notice a difference (alone) if you changed up sizes of your toys from week to week.
04/22/2009
Contributor: Kallandar Kallandar
My favourite toy is one I have that is a slightly large girth. I was having sex a couple of weeks back and the guy I was with kept saying how tight I was. I used to worry about the same things that you are, but now I don't.
11/19/2009
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
My wife is reluctant to use larger toys because she is afraid of getting stretched out. I have purchased several larger toys - and as long as I work up to the size she can accommodate them nicely - and enjoys them enough that she often ejaculates.

When we have sex the tightness is usually a function of lubrication. However, if we have sex after one of the larger toys - she is a bit loose. We adapt by doing it doggy style with her legs together.

She's also rediscovered kegels which is good thing for both of us!
11/19/2009
Contributor: Vexed Vexed
I actually love it when a woman craves playing with a large toy. It is a major turn on for me when a woman has a "size queen" side to her.

I've used a dildo on my girlfriend that is quite a bit thicker than my penis. Like Gunsmoke said, it feels a little looser only right after. If more time has passed, I can't tell a difference. Even if it is right after the thick dildo opened her up , the difference is very slight.

Even then, feeling her vagina being looser around my penis because a bigger cock opened her up is a turn on for me. It reminds me of how she enjoys feeling "filled up" by the large toy, and how the pressure it provides gives her an intense orgasm. So, I like feeling her vagina more open once in a while. It doesn't have to feel the same every time. I don't like small or tight vaginas anyway. I see them as being limited as to what toys can be used to play with.
06/27/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
The vagina will temporarily change shape to accommodate virtually any standard toy or penis (with proper preparation) as well as the head and body of an infant during childbirth.

However, it doesn't "stretch out of shape" from any of the above. The muscles and tissue are CLOSED, the sides touch, when the vagina is at rest, whether you are a 14 year old virgin or a 50 year old multi-para (a woman who has had many children) who likes the "Great American Challenge" dildo and has sex twice a day.

Does your mouth "Stretch out of shape" because sometimes you open it wide to take a bite out of a big burger, or give head to a large man? Absolutely not. Neither does your vagina.

Yes, the vagina can certainly lose TONE from disuse, or from not Kegaling and keeping it in shape after having kids etc. but this is not the same as "stretching." It is more the muscles going slack, not "widening" in any way. It can be remedied, and some women have natural strong tone and don't go slack even with age and childbirth. Nobody has a permanently stretched vagina....what the guys said above about feeling a little looser for a short period of time (minutes actually) after a large toy has been used is common, but the tissue snaps right back into shape after a short period of time.

Use whatever size vibrator or dildo you feel comfortable with, and don't be afraid of the Biggies, if that's what you like, because they will do absolutely NO permanent change to your sex organs.
06/28/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
The vagina will temporarily change shape to accommodate virtually any standard toy or penis (with proper preparation) as well as the head and body of an infant during childbirth.

However, it doesn't "stretch out of shape" from ... more
Yay!
06/28/2010
Contributor: Vexed Vexed
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
The vagina will temporarily change shape to accommodate virtually any standard toy or penis (with proper preparation) as well as the head and body of an infant during childbirth.

However, it doesn't "stretch out of shape" from ... more
I totally agree. Enjoy the biggies without worry!
06/29/2010
Contributor: Sera Sera
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
I was kinda wondering other's opinions on this, so I figured it'd go here <3So, when I first got into toys I didn't have much of a concept of size and how big was too big. I had one larger vibrator, that ended up breaking (It was one ... more
I use what I want to use, but I do prefer smaller. The choice is up to you! The female vagina can accommodate very large things, including babies! So don't worry about size.
07/29/2010
Contributor: Timaree Timaree
Here's a good explanation about the variations in vaginal size and dimensions: link
08/06/2010
Contributor: SydVicious SydVicious
I have a new found love for larger toys. I don't use a huge toy every time, but sometimes I like the filled up feeling of a larger toy. As far as I am concerned.. as long as I do my kegels.
08/06/2010
Contributor: Vexed Vexed
Quote:
Originally posted by SydVicious
I have a new found love for larger toys. I don't use a huge toy every time, but sometimes I like the filled up feeling of a larger toy. As far as I am concerned.. as long as I do my kegels.
I wish more women had a similar perspective, and enjoyed using a very thick toy on occasion.
08/22/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by Vexed
I wish more women had a similar perspective, and enjoyed using a very thick toy on occasion.
Me too. My wife won't use a big one because she think's it'll stretch her out. I told her I don't care- I want to hear her moan!
08/24/2010
Contributor: MEL MEL
I love med size toys but bigger toys are good once in a great while, and i dont like the kind that over vibrate. So not to big and not JACK hammer strong.
08/24/2010