Can women who are into BDSM be feminists?

Contributor: sillylilkitten sillylilkitten
Let me just start this off by saying that I am a sexual submissive and I am also a feminist, so obviously the answer is yes, but I want to know what other people think. I've had plenty of radfems or just generally rude people insult me for calling myself a feminist while choosing to submit to my male partner sexually. It is my firm belief that a) sexuality of any form, not just sexual orientation, is not a choice, but a part of who you are, and b) that being able to choose what you want to do with your own body sexually is perfectly in line with the goals of feminism, even if what you choose to do is submit to someone else. I hope that discussions here can remain civil, and I am curious to know what people think. And feel free to discuss other aspects of this topic, it doesn't just have to be about sexually submissive heterosexual women.
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Yes, they can.
lilacviolet , Lildrummrgurl7 , Toy Fiend , solitudinarian , Loriandhubby , GONE! , eri86 , sweetpea12 , Bleu , AnnieMouse , ChaiMocha , twelve13 , sillylilkitten , FieryRed , novanilla , gsfanatic , KinkyKatieJames , caramilk , AmethystQueen , TheirPet , Vanille , emilia , Kitka , anonymous1298304 , srexom , Genderfree , aaronlt , Eugler , mdnght , bog , bratcat , gwenevieve , LoneOokami , Allison.Wilder , ShadowedSeductress
35  (100%)
No, they can't.
Well, it's not a clear yes or no, let me explain.
Total votes: 35
Poll is closed
03/09/2013
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Contributor: Toy Fiend Toy Fiend
Of course someone can like BDSM and be a feminist
03/09/2013
Contributor: eri86 eri86
Of course.
03/10/2013
Contributor: sweetpea12 sweetpea12
Quote:
Originally posted by sillylilkitten
Let me just start this off by saying that I am a sexual submissive and I am also a feminist, so obviously the answer is yes, but I want to know what other people think. I've had plenty of radfems or just generally rude people insult me for ... more
Yes!! I think it's very possible
03/10/2013
Contributor: Bleu Bleu
There are different degrees of feminism. So yes, I think they can.
03/10/2013
Contributor: AnnieMouse AnnieMouse
Yes, without a doubt. Women should be free to make their own choices, and I believe that's what feminism is.
03/10/2013
Contributor: twelve13 twelve13
Of course. I am one of them.
03/10/2013
Contributor: FieryRed FieryRed
I think those who believe otherwise are probably people who don't really understand BDSM and power exchange play. Perhaps you could try explaining to them that getting turned on by behaving submissively with a partner you trust doesn't mean that you believe women are property, or less capable than men, any more than performing oral sex implies an endorsement of cannibalism. Also, that in a proper dom/sub encounter, the sub is actually the one with more power, as s/he can stop the action at any time, and a good dom will only enjoy doing things to the sub that s/he finds arousing.
03/14/2013
Contributor: novanilla novanilla
I am a queer feminist who is very liberal (like actually liberal, not Democrat "liberals") and I practice bdsm as a switch. With my current partner, who is a cismale and self-identified feminist, I am very much a submissive, and neither of us thinks we are less of feminists for it.
03/15/2013
Contributor: AmethystQueen AmethystQueen
I don't think one has a bearing on the other. Feminists can be submissives or dominants. Whatever she chooses!
03/19/2013
Contributor: TheirPet TheirPet
Yes that's perfectly okay. I don't think one negates the other.
03/19/2013
Contributor: emilia emilia
yes
03/19/2013
Contributor: srexom srexom
of course what I don't really see how they relate.
03/19/2013
Contributor: Genderfree Genderfree
I'm a guy and I am a feminist and I am into BDSM. I don't see how that relates, honestly.
03/19/2013
Contributor: mdnght mdnght
Quote:
Originally posted by AnnieMouse
Yes, without a doubt. Women should be free to make their own choices, and I believe that's what feminism is.
Exactly.
03/20/2013
Contributor: bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by sillylilkitten
Let me just start this off by saying that I am a sexual submissive and I am also a feminist, so obviously the answer is yes, but I want to know what other people think. I've had plenty of radfems or just generally rude people insult me for ... more
I know many.
03/21/2013
Contributor: bratcat bratcat
Of course! feminism is about choice and the freedom and right to make choice, just because someone practices BDSM or role play (like rape fantasies) will not make them less of a feminist. Those types of practices come with a lot of talk, trust and compromise and one is free to choose to involve themselves in it or not.
03/21/2013
Contributor: gwenevieve gwenevieve
Quote:
Originally posted by sillylilkitten
Let me just start this off by saying that I am a sexual submissive and I am also a feminist, so obviously the answer is yes, but I want to know what other people think. I've had plenty of radfems or just generally rude people insult me for ... more
duh.

most people dont understand bdsm and most feminists are horrible people who dont understand ANYTHING and are just making women look worse so (im not against feminism but i really hate the feminist movement that is happening now, its very transphobic and such)
03/29/2013
Contributor: LoneOokami LoneOokami
Of course they can, anyone that says otherwise is an idiot of the highest degree
04/05/2013
Contributor: Allison.Wilder Allison.Wilder
Quote:
Originally posted by sillylilkitten
Let me just start this off by saying that I am a sexual submissive and I am also a feminist, so obviously the answer is yes, but I want to know what other people think. I've had plenty of radfems or just generally rude people insult me for ... more
Of course they can.
04/06/2013