My wonderful community! Okay, I can see that you are not really into cinematography, so I will try entertaining you with social media jokes.
Since we were talking recently about sex being everywhere around us - and having sex on the brain -
I propose you to have a laugh over these excellent tweets on our favorite topic.
1.
Handsome Tweet Guy @SortaBad
Boy do I love sex. Really love putting my penis into some *looks at smudged writing on hand* verguba
7:39 AM - 5 Aug 2014
2. David Hughes @david8hughes
Me: Netflix & chill?
Her: sure
[later that night]
Her: so you don't have Netflix?
Me [pulling out 20 condoms]: I don't have chill either
5:05 PM - 15 Sep 2015
3. Michael @Home_Halfway
[Goes to buy Virgin Airlines ticket]
"Can I buy one even if I've done sex?"
Um. Yes sir
"Cause I have"
Okay
"I've done all of it"
Please go
10:11 PM - 8 Jan 2015
4. dan @oxygenplug
"yes I'm very good in bed"
*folds blanket and neatly props up pillow*
*pillow falls over*
"Oh no, this doesn't normally happen I swear"
8:45 PM - 20 Apr 2014
5. some light crying @somelightcrying
[sex]
HER: talk confusedly to me
ME: what
HER: oh fuck yeah
8:50 PM - 24 Mar 2015
6. shut up, mike @shutupmikeginn
Sex is like pizza, if you're going to use bbq sauce you better know what the fuck you're doing
11:59 PM - 26 Dec 2013
7.
pakalu papito @pakalupapito
sex is cool but have u ever had garlic bread
5:14 AM - 28 Feb 2015
8.
Cool Eric @OBiiieeee
[trying not to think about Sonic The Hedgehog during sex]
Her: faster! faster!
Me: oh god no
6:49 AM - 23 Oct 2014
9.
God @TheTweetOfGod
Sex is a sacred, beautiful thing and you should wait to have it until you're absolutely sure you're horny.
3:20 AM - 26 May 2014
10. Rocky Momax @rockymomax
[having sex]
Me: Oh ya you like that?
Her: Deeper!
Me: [baritone voice] OH YA YOU LIKE THAT?
5:03 PM - 1 Nov 2015
11. Kalvin @KalvinMacleod
Welcome to Sexual Innuendo Club. Thank you all for coming.
7:06 PM - 13 Jul 2015
12. Rolo XG @TheRolo
Cake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake
1:03 AM - 16 May 2014
13. Aparna Nancherla @aparnapkin
Every text conversation feels like bad sex where one person doesn't get to finish
11:50 PM - 3 Jan 2015
You can read the rest (I left the least funny untouched) here
Pick your favorite, post it in our discussion thread and we can even try inventing a few of our own! ALERT - The best and the funniest joke will be published on our company's Twitter!
Let's have a good laugh together
Since we were talking recently about sex being everywhere around us - and having sex on the brain -
I propose you to have a laugh over these excellent tweets on our favorite topic.
1.
Handsome Tweet Guy @SortaBad
Boy do I love sex. Really love putting my penis into some *looks at smudged writing on hand* verguba
7:39 AM - 5 Aug 2014
2.
David Hughes @david8hughes
Me: Netflix & chill?
Her: sure
[later that night]
Her: so you don't have Netflix?
Me [pulling out 20 condoms]: I don't have chill either
5:05 PM - 15 Sep 2015
3.
Michael @Home_Halfway
[Goes to buy Virgin Airlines ticket]
"Can I buy one even if I've done sex?"
Um. Yes sir
"Cause I have"
Okay
"I've done all of it"
Please go
10:11 PM - 8 Jan 2015
4.
dan @oxygenplug
"yes I'm very good in bed"
*folds blanket and neatly props up pillow*
*pillow falls over*
"Oh no, this doesn't normally happen I swear"
8:45 PM - 20 Apr 2014
5.
some light crying @somelightcrying
[sex]
HER: talk confusedly to me
ME: what
HER: oh fuck yeah
8:50 PM - 24 Mar 2015
6.
shut up, mike @shutupmikeginn
Sex is like pizza, if you're going to use bbq sauce you better know what the fuck you're doing
11:59 PM - 26 Dec 2013
7.
pakalu papito @pakalupapito
sex is cool but have u ever had garlic bread
5:14 AM - 28 Feb 2015
8.
Cool Eric @OBiiieeee
[trying not to think about Sonic The Hedgehog during sex]
Her: faster! faster!
Me: oh god no
6:49 AM - 23 Oct 2014
9.
God @TheTweetOfGod
Sex is a sacred, beautiful thing and you should wait to have it until you're absolutely sure you're horny.
3:20 AM - 26 May 2014
10.
Rocky Momax @rockymomax
[having sex]
Me: Oh ya you like that?
Her: Deeper!
Me: [baritone voice] OH YA YOU LIKE THAT?
5:03 PM - 1 Nov 2015
11.
Kalvin @KalvinMacleod
Welcome to Sexual Innuendo Club. Thank you all for coming.
7:06 PM - 13 Jul 2015
12.
Rolo XG @TheRolo
Cake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake
1:03 AM - 16 May 2014
13.
Aparna Nancherla @aparnapkin
Every text conversation feels like bad sex where one person doesn't get to finish
11:50 PM - 3 Jan 2015
You can read the rest (I left the least funny untouched) here
Pick your favorite, post it in our discussion thread and we can even try inventing a few of our own! ALERT - The best and the funniest joke will be published on our company's Twitter!
Let's have a good laugh together
