Yup. More often than white guys or men of European decent.

I live in China, so there are hardly ever any white Canadians running about.

I find that the foreign men (from all over the world) I've dated here in China to be fantastic examples of human beings and our relationships have usually ended because one of us is leaving or because they wanted to make the relationship serious. The Chinese men I've dated... they like to control, too many refuse to learn and grow, and quite a number of them beleive that sex is for men only and that women are not supposed to enjoy sex. They try to refuse to wear a condom or listen to my opinions of putting on a condom (squirt of lube first anyone???)... and this is not all the Chinese men I've dated, but the majority. And yes, Chinese men in the bigger cities are sometimes different and each man is different and yes I am grouping Chinese men (of Mainland China not born and raised Chinese men of other countries born and raised) in the same group but I am jsut so grrrr about them!!!!!

Can you tell?

For making a relationship work when you have been brought up in the same town, city, even the same country is pretty easy as you have similar backgrounds. There are going to be some issues, but when you begin to feel your little radar of oh no something is annoying me flare, deal with it. Try to find out what is cause that annoyance. Is it because of the soap scent stuck to his skin or is it that he burps after each and every meal? Burping is sometimes cultural and accepted behaviour in some families. Deal with the little things and be sure to understand the reasonings behind them.

For my family when they have known I have dated outside my "race"... my father wanted to disown me, my friends thought I was insnae and then I moved to China and discovered, who cares what anyone thinks? Race is over thought of and if you really want to be a modern person? We are all humans. Who cares what we look like.

As for your seventeen year ago gap? Does it bother you? If your answer is yes, then you might have problems. If you answer no, whose business is it? If people respect you as a person, and they cannot respect you for your decision to date a man they do not approve of, did they really respect you in the first place?

Laugh! Seriously, it's the only thing you can do. My partner and I are 19 years apart. And we have many rude comments. Especially since he is the same age as my parents. They even went to school together, but he didn't know me while growing up. He didn't meet me until I was 16.

Anyhow, laughing is the only way to deal with these rude comments. Try not to let them bother you. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks but you! If you are happy, then nothing else matters.

Thanks sweetie I have opened up to a few of my friends about the situation and who I was talking to so far I have people on my side. My mom is on my side as well and has told me as long as I am happy she really doesn't care. I just worried about everyone else when its all said and done. I know my ex will have tons of rude things to say which I shouldn't care what he has to say as I mean he ripped my heart out and smashed it. I guess it will still hurt though knowing exactly what he will say and then hate me more then I am sure he already does an won't ever talk to me again!

*sigh*
Any who we the guy I am talking to are meeting up soon

Thanks for the response...Thing is I am one of those "rednecks" so to speak more so country girl,rebel flag,country music you know! The guy knows all this and it doesn't bother him he was worried about what my parents would think but they are supporting me YAY so we are going to go with it. I am just worried about my ex starting shit

Thanks I am just worried about what people are going to say especially my ex I know he will start shit "/

That's a pity. Really, though, if he says anything nasty about it, that just proves that there are some seriously good reasons he is your ex, not your current partner. If people can't understand how someone could enjoy dating/want to be with someone outside their race, that's their loss, and it means that they are probably not good partners to people of any racial group. Bigotry - it's not sexy.

If anyone gets really confrontational about it with you, my best advice is to just ask them why they care so much. Unless they want to sleep with one or both of you, your relationship really doesn't affect their life at all.

Thanks that really makes me feel a little better, I know though he will make racial remarks. I use to always say I would NEVER date outside of my race but they say never say never. The guy I am talking to was only worried about what my parents would think since I am a Southern Country Girl. My parents are all fine with it no problems as long as I am happy,I am slowly telling my close friends about who I am talking to in hopes that they are supportive. So far, with everyone I have told it has shocked them but they support me in what I am doing So that is a plus! I just have my worries and fears of things getting screwed up once my ex finds out. My new motto is if you aren't fucking me,feeding me or providing for me then don't worry about me. I just don't want things to get messed up between me and the guy I am talking to.

For a better term, you could try POC or person of color.