Aside from my time of the month, I find that it is important to stop having sex when a family crisis has occurred. My reason for this is that when your man (or even female) is stressed, it can be more difficult to relax, concentrate, and achieve a pleasurable orgasm. Much less stay erect at all. Of course it is important to stay close in time of need, so my fiance and I will engage in things such as massages, long talks, or hours in the bathtub just talking. A little less sex, a little more compassion.

I am with Secret on this one. Stress is a big one. I have found if I push intercourse when we are both stressed out it can make things harder. Either I get offended he is not that into sex or I get mad at myself because I am just not that into sex either. Talking and being intimate in other ways is the way to go. Even little things like a nice dinner and movie. Back to the teenage dating night can be relaxing. Hope this helps. I have been married five years.

I have been in a long term rela for about 6 1/2 years. We have our ups and downs with sex but we never really have a sort of agreement such as "alright we should take a break now..." it just happens on it's own.

It usually happens bcs of stress, or other time constraints, such as scheduals that don't fit leading to different sleep cycles, etc.

We are always intimate with one another, kissing touching as we prepare dinner, etc. We are huge cuddle monsters, we cuddle everyday after dinner. It's our way of reconnecting.

Ditto on the stress factor.

I'm the opposite on the stress factor. My partner and I tend to have more sex when we're stressed. We tend to fight more if we don't.

during stressed times it seems like sex actually helps us

I'm with Brosia on this one.

We have sex a lot, but if we are tired or one of us is not feeling well, the other is not put off because they are not getting it. For us, sex can act as a great stress and menstrual cramp/symptom reliever. So, in times of crisis, it can be a wonderful way to reconnect and keep our moods level.

Sex is a very important part of our relationship, it helps us relax, and an orgasm of any kind helps clear the cobwebs in our brains and can also help to release any uncried tears that I might need to get rid of. Compassion is involved in every aspect of our relationship, especially the sexual part.

So, no. For us, if we find it necessary to stop having sex there is most likely a really BIG problem that needs addressing.

The only time I do not want to have sex is when Im really angry with my partner. But usally after a day or so and him apologizing... we are back to having fun!

I do not have a partner at present but when I'm upset, sex calms me down and eases my mind away from my troubles. My thinking becomes more clear and I can think of a solution to my troubles better after orgasm.

Does anyone ever take breaks only because the other partner doesn't want to? I have never had this happen, but my roommate is having this issue right now. She is currently dating a female (her first lesbian relationship, it's been 3 months). Her partner doesn't feel like sex is a "good idea" at the moment, but my roommate is like "wtf" about it.

The only time we have had scheduled "breaks" is the 4-6 weeks after childbirth. The doctors recommended 6 weeks, but that was a bit tough for my wife and I to last. Other than that it has occasionally been because of stress, but since it relieves so much tension and everything a lot of times we have more in stressful times. (Unless the stress is caused by some conflict between us, and then it comes after!)

I don't think you ever need to step away from sexual intimacy in a relationship, unless it is being used as a distraction from dealing with the problems that are occurring within the relationship (ie, Having sex to cheer you/partner up when you are upset, instead of talking about why.)

People always tend to feel better about things after sex, and I have found in my own relationships, as well as in friends relationships, that it is often used as a bandaid solution. Much like alcohol.

We have never talked to each other about taking time off from sex. Not sure that is a conversation I could ever see us having unless we were having serious problems. Part of the intimacy with a relationship is the sex. Or at least it is to me. I am trying to answer your above question but honestly all rules change when you are talking of two females. Females are so different from males. And I have no experience with the two females. When asking my best friend he laughed and said that would never happen with him and his boyfriend. He says no matter what they are ready to go even if they are breaking up.

we hit a lull occasionally but never forgo intimate contact in stressful or crisis situations (i.e. a huge life change). We need each other. It helps us to reaffirm our love and let's us know someone is there for them that get's what we are going through. It helps me to open my heart to him in this way and often it is just a stress reliever (who needs a squeeze stress ball? hehe). We also don't stop for my period. Hop in the shower folks, lol! Believe it or not it helps with my cramps plus my hormones run crazy during that time!!

I don't have an actual period, but I do get extreme period symptoms still (from endometriosis) and during that week we can't have sex at all really because it's too painful. Other than that we'll do it just about any time unless I've been super busy and too stressed out. Or if I'm really upset over something, then sex isnt always a good idea.

Honestly, I don't think it's a great idea to stop having sex for an extended period of time. If we go several days we start irritating each other, and I start to feel very disconnected and just "off". If one of us is sick/hurt/in pain, or too tired we won't do it. We also don't take it personally if the other person can't due to sickness or exhaustion. But we make sure to talk about it and make it clear that the mind is willing and able, it's just the body that isn't up to par at that particular time.

Not too long ago I had some serious issues with a family member's health, and I felt guilty about being with my sweetie (getting pleasure while my family member was in the ICU seemed so selfish). We talked about it a lot though, and he helped me realize I wasn't hurting my family member or being selfish, I was just taking care of myself so I could continue taking care of my family member. And after a couple of days we did have sex because I really needed to feel that closeness again and feel safe - it was a wonderful release of stress and after an amazing orgasm I had a good cry and slept like a log. Sometimes under stress just reconnecting on that level is the best thing you can do. You can just get all those bad feelings out of you.

Agree with BBW too - in times of stress many men want more sex (to relieve stress, feel loved and nurtured, etc.) while many women want less sex (too stressed to relax enough, etc.). In long term relationships it's all about give and take - if you take care of your partner, they're happier to take care of you.