The New Intimacy

When do you stop trying to impress your partner?

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Contributor: Eliza Eliza
A lot of people claim that over time relationships lose their spark. This usually happens when partners become comfortable with one another, and flirting/impressing becomes less important. Has this happened to you, and if so, when?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
I never try to impress my partners.
ana123 , misslady , IrishLassie , PassionQT , Kilgorescowboy , froggiemoma , charcat , Tart , ChickRocking , cujo467 , P'Gell , Ghost , Bignuf , The Curious Couple , LunaLuthor
15
As soon as they agree to be my significant other.
Within 6 months.
guard083 , StephieBoo02
2
Within a year.
HollisJ , tickle me pink , Squirtz Starz
3
Within 5 years.
Dark Muse , Pleasure Piratess , Eliza , secretside , sugar&spikes
5
Within 10 years.
A Good Girl
1
Within 20 years.
We'll never lose the spark. :]
Sammi , Not here , northstar , darthkitt3n , J's Alley , Penguin , onehotmomma , Darling Jen , Emma (Girl With Fire) , Tori Rebel , Victoria , Airen Wolf , PussyGalore , MeliPixie , Envy , Lucidity , Lady Neshamah , BadassFatass , leatherlover , Porfiriato , SexyySarah , Lady Venus , Mr. E , The Awesome Penguin , Kindred , Beaners , Danielle1220 , ~LaUr3n~ , Mr. & Mrs. Peg , ScottA , sbon , *HisMrs* , Redboxbaby , Madeira , married with children , Selective Sensualist , Faith , rdytogo , potstickers , ToxicHeart , SexyTabby , RosesThorns , D&&JForever , LittleBoPeep , jzzrzz , Koko , kinky girlfriend , LavenderSkies , Carrie Ann , Aurore , Dark Muse , Gunsmoke , IrishLassie , Crystal1 , markeagleone , liilii080 , KrissyRoro , Eliza , newlady , Mlee , mrs.mckrakn , Valentinka , danellejohns , Cream in the Cupcake , tickle me pink , GravyCakes , mariedoll , AdmNeg , Devz , padmeamidala , newfoundlust , MaryExy , P'Gell , AgnesTrevejo , ss143 , link82 , K101 , Lio , aliceinthehole , lovemuscle n cookie , Sex'и'Violence , Peggi , IslandGoddess , T-n-T , TheSlyFox , sausagelover , Jon S , StephieBoo02 , KrazyKandy , - Kira - , freshbananas , null , Beck , The Curious Couple , Rawr4483 , Feisty , Incendiaire , pinkpottergirl , TheirPet , Brittanyx , LunaLuthor , booboo111926 , Martiniman , SavingMyself
104
Total votes: 130 (122 voters)
Poll is closed
12/06/2010
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Contributor: Sammi Sammi
We just celebrated our 19th anniversary, and we've been together longer than that. We haven't lost our spark yet, and I don't think we will
12/06/2010
Contributor: Not here Not here
I believe in keeping a certain level of mystery, if you will. Basically, as far as my man is concerned, I don't fart or poop, and I intend to keep it that way. I think there is such a thing as being too comfortable with a partner, and it generally leads to losing the "spark." It's important to dress up for each other, and continue to do sweet things for each other well into a relationship.
12/06/2010
Contributor: darthkitt3n darthkitt3n
Quote:
Originally posted by Not here
I believe in keeping a certain level of mystery, if you will. Basically, as far as my man is concerned, I don't fart or poop, and I intend to keep it that way. I think there is such a thing as being too comfortable with a partner, and it ... more
I agree. My boyfriend is unaware of me doing either as well. I have a friend who is completely comfortable with using the toilet in front of his girlfriend. She was telling a bunch of people she didn't know all about it. That freaked me out.
12/07/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Not here
I believe in keeping a certain level of mystery, if you will. Basically, as far as my man is concerned, I don't fart or poop, and I intend to keep it that way. I think there is such a thing as being too comfortable with a partner, and it ... more
I'm the same way. I like keeping him under the illusion of 'I'm a girl, I don't do that stuff'. Although honestly I have no problem if he's a little more open with me - it's a bit of a gender double standard, I know, but I'm ok with it.

But he consistently spoils me and is sweet to me, no less now than the day we met. We never really tried to 'impress' each other, we both just work hard to enjoy each other and love each other as much as we can.
12/07/2010
Contributor: Victoria Victoria
We hang out in our PJs and have bedhead most days - but we do nice things for each other and we do look nice when we go out. I guess we never tried to "impress" each other, per se. We just like to do things that show our love for each other. It's often the little things that matter most and show that we're each paying attention. We just live it.
12/07/2010
Contributor: Not here Not here
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
I'm the same way. I like keeping him under the illusion of 'I'm a girl, I don't do that stuff'. Although honestly I have no problem if he's a little more open with me - it's a bit of a gender double standard, I know, but ... more
I can totally relate. My man is the type that is ok going to the bathroom with the door open, and it doesn't bother me- but I would never do it myself! Might be a double standard, but who cares if we're okay with it!
12/07/2010
Contributor: PussyGalore PussyGalore
We haven't lost our spark, we just express it in different ways now that we've been together for 13 years.
12/07/2010
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
Quote:
Originally posted by Victoria
We hang out in our PJs and have bedhead most days - but we do nice things for each other and we do look nice when we go out. I guess we never tried to "impress" each other, per se. We just like to do things that show our love for each ... more
Yeah, that's still really cute, though!
12/07/2010
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
Quote:
Originally posted by PussyGalore
We haven't lost our spark, we just express it in different ways now that we've been together for 13 years.
That's a great way to look at it. Things change and evolve, but that doesn't mean it has to be better or worse. Just different.
12/07/2010
Contributor: SexyySarah SexyySarah
Why do you think I'm on this site! lol between the different toys and lingerie we will be going for quite some time!
12/14/2010
Contributor: Taylor Taylor
I guess I've never been in a relationship long enough to worry about the spark being gone.
12/14/2010
Contributor: Danielle1220 Danielle1220
I still try to impress him all the time
12/22/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I don't have to try. It comes natural . We amaze each other daily. I am still impressed by him and he is of me.
12/22/2010
Contributor: Mr. & Mrs. Peg Mr. & Mrs. Peg
I don't try to impress. I pay attention to her needs. She pays attention to mine. That keeps things hot enough.
12/22/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr. & Mrs. Peg
I don't try to impress. I pay attention to her needs. She pays attention to mine. That keeps things hot enough.
Really that is "impressing" her - it's the more long-term sort of impression rather than worrying about minute details about how you look and your poise.
12/23/2010
Contributor: sbon sbon
That spark shouldn't fade. You just start impressing each other in different ways than before.
12/23/2010
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by Victoria
We hang out in our PJs and have bedhead most days - but we do nice things for each other and we do look nice when we go out. I guess we never tried to "impress" each other, per se. We just like to do things that show our love for each ... more
Here, here! We do the same thing!
12/23/2010
Contributor: UnknownGirl UnknownGirl
I hope I never stop.
12/24/2010
Contributor: Madeira Madeira
Quote:
Originally posted by Eliza
A lot of people claim that over time relationships lose their spark. This usually happens when partners become comfortable with one another, and flirting/impressing becomes less important. Has this happened to you, and if so, when?
I always try to impress...
12/25/2010
Contributor: married with children married with children
never, always try to
12/25/2010
Contributor: HollisJ HollisJ
After you hook them and have them, it's done.
12/25/2010
Contributor: moonch1ld moonch1ld
I don't know about losing any spark but after having consistent sex with a partner I will care less about looking poorly at times or always be a gentleman
12/25/2010
Contributor: ana123 ana123
I always tried to impress guys but it was different with my current partner. I had decided not to date and we were good friends when he asked me out but I decided to give it a go. But this time i wanted to be just myself, I didn't want to pretend to be something I couldn't keep up. So he never saw me with makeup on, I was in ROTC (an army program) when we started dating, and I was just plain old me. It worked and we've been dating for 4 years now which is pretty exciting to me! So o guess not trying to impress him really impressed him!
12/29/2010
Contributor: SexyTabby SexyTabby
I'm not sure impress is the right word but we always keep each other's attention. Makes life fun
12/29/2010
Contributor: RosesThorns RosesThorns
I doubt I will ever stop trying to impress my other half...
12/30/2010
Contributor: guard083 guard083
We still try to impress each other but don't put as much work in it as we used to. We see eachother when we wake up and still love each other just as much and he still tells me i look beautiful no matter what. We still have the spark in us but i dont have to spend 2 hours trying to look pretty for him because he thinks I am already
01/12/2011
Contributor: Koko Koko
Quote:
Originally posted by Eliza
A lot of people claim that over time relationships lose their spark. This usually happens when partners become comfortable with one another, and flirting/impressing becomes less important. Has this happened to you, and if so, when?
Definitely never. I am comfortable with him, but I always try to look my best. I want him to be proud to have me by his side. We have only been together for four years but he still tells me I'm beautiful every day no matter what. I honestly believe him too... I've never had someone look at me quite the way he does.
01/12/2011
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
Quote:
Originally posted by guard083
We still try to impress each other but don't put as much work in it as we used to. We see eachother when we wake up and still love each other just as much and he still tells me i look beautiful no matter what. We still have the spark in us but i ... more
That's how I am with my partner. Comfort has taken place of the worry of trying to impress her, and now I just do it for fun. :]
01/12/2011
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
I think it's cute how strong the response is for not losing the spark.
01/12/2011