What she said.

I think an apology IS in order.....from HIM to YOU. He is NOT being attentive to YOUR needs. I think you need to have a real heart to heart talk with this guy and maybe TEACH him to be a better lover. Obviously YOU want to make love to him...so TEACH him how to do it "right".

Best wishes.

Mr Bignuf...putting my 2 cents worth in."COME ON GUYS...STEP UP AND BE MEN". Even if I cum first (yes, it happens), my JOB, TASK, and indeed ENJOYMENT is not complete,till I make sure my love has cum ..once,twice, three times, or maybe till she screams "uncle" and yanks my hand, or tongue, off her clit (or stops whatever I am doing, since she can no longer catch her breath). THAT is when I am happy,satisfied and know I have been a good lover. TO just "jack off" inside her and stop???? That would be nuts. If you want to do that, go get a cheap plastic masturbation toy.
If you want to be a REAL "LOVER", then FINISH THE JOB, even if you have cum already and your penis goes soft, you cannot tell me that playing with your fingers in and on your lover, or kissing, licking and sucking on her beautiful "girlie parts" is not pure ecstasy!!! HAVE FUN..and "GET ER DONE"!!!!

High five, Mr. Bignuf!! That is my husband's stance as well.

mrs.mckrakn , Mr. Mcrakn should thank his lucky stars that he has a wife that wants to make the situation awesome for both of you. If toys are what it takes, then so be it. It sounds like he needs to become more familiar with them and understand that they're not replacing him. Talk to him, and suggest that maybe next time, he be the one in control of the toy.

Some boys just need to sack up

Sadly men seem to be able to come faster then women... and it is harder for them to stay STIFF after they do so that means LESS FOR US.

Personally my man doesn't mind my toys at all, infact.. he loves to watch me use them. HOWEVER, I don't think I would grab a toy right after he had sex with me just because he was getting soft, I think it would embarrass him.


I think that, that would be like saying that he didn't do it for me, but thisd piece of plastic can, thats just my opinion. But I do get how it feels to not "get there" because the male partner has already gotten his and is now tired and soft... so I see why you did want to do it on your own, especially when you where so close.

I still might apologize though(even if not with words)... Just make sure you "show" him, that he is still your man and that he satisfys you.

Forwarding to fiance....

No apology needed. If any he owes the apology. If he know you want to get off then i feel like he should at least consider trying other things to help you achieve that.

Agreed

I'm so glad you learned to orgasm! I remember when you came here and hadn't yet. It's a great accomplishment! KUDOS!

I do need to ask, though. Isn't he happy that you can come, now? Has he changed what he does in bed to HELP now that it's obvious you are certainly capable of orgasm? Doesn't he want to share in that?

You may not be able to orgasm during PIV. So what? A lot of women can't. I can't if I haven't already had an orgasm from oral sex and toys first! But My Man always helps me, he plays with toys with me, he'll hold the toys and suggest different ones, he'll give me oral sex until I pass out, what ever it takes. Then, when I start to come, I drop the Wahl and he dive down and starts giving me head again and I have the most amazing orgasms ever. Doesn't your man want to be part of that? Even by just helping?

I'm glad you're coming now. I just wish he cared enough to stay in the same room. Again, as I asked Mrs.McCrakin, Does he think HIS orgasm is more important than yours? If so, how can he be dealt with? Does he understand it's nothing more than selfishness?

It just makes me sad to think of women alone in their bathrooms or the spare room of their home, using their vibrators alone, when a perfectly healthy man, who just got HIS orgasm from HER efforts sits in an other room and does NOTHING. It pisses me off, too.

Damn right, Mr.B.

My husband endorses the same way of lovin'. He would never think of leaving the room when I'm horny. (He has on occasion fallen asleep. I'm not above waking him up and saying, "Hey, I'm not done. Get to work!" And he does.)

A real man finishes the job, soft or not. There's more than one way to get a woman to orgasm. If a man wants to keep his woman, he's best learn them all! And visa versa, I know at least a dozen ways to get My Man to come, maybe more. It's part of my job, as it is part of his to get me to come. Toys, finger, tongues, whatever, a real man doesn't QUIT when his partner isn't satisfied.

These men need to be talked to, if they don't want to talk about the issue, I know what I'd be doing.... I'd be stepping out. Seriously. Sex is too important to me to accept a partner who doesn't care about me and my responses. One of the reasons I married the man I did was his absolute dedication to making sure we were both satisfied with the sex we are having.

I'm going to stop talking now. But, this is one issue that just drives me to distraction. And a damn good illustration for why "test driving" one's partners before marriage is essential. Otherwise you'll spend the rest of your life in frustration and feeling justified resentment.

I agree

She was already masturbating, he interrupted her, got his rocks off and then couldn't finish her off. I say he needs to get over himself. Something I definitely dislike is a man who's ego gets in the way of my orgasms.

No! Don't feel bad. You should be able to cum to!

Taboo Whispers

i don't think so