Chubby and seeking advice...

Chubby and seeking advice...

lobstermanswife lobstermanswife
I'm chubby and single. And I think until I'm no longer chubby, I'm going to stay single. Any advice for attracting quality men when I'm not at a perfect skinny weight?
10/16/2012
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Chilipepper Chilipepper
Okay, here's something to chew over - if they're attracted to the packaging, do they really give a hoot what's inside? Would they dump you if you gain five pounds? If the only reason they're attracted is because of being a certain size, then they're so shallow that they have the spiritual depth of a birdbath. You certainly won't be happy with those types.

Hang at places that focus on intellect and creativity with your interests in mind - meaning, stay out of the bars and clubs, which are one-night-stand meat markets.

Network with friends who know you - they may have coworkers, family, or other friends that share the same philosophies or hobbies or whatnot as you.

And, believe it or not, there are men who do appreciate the extra curves. I know - I'm a size 18 and have been dating since my divorce two years ago. I've been offered the position of mistress by two different friends. I'm currently dating a guy who had a crush on me since high school (I was a size 18 then, too). And yet I live in a state that is obsessed with beach bodies.

Dig deeper for the quality - it exists, including men who appreciate you as you are.
10/16/2012
Red Riding Hood Red Riding Hood
I totally agree with the previous comment. I also think that there are quality men out there who are attracted to fuller figured women. Some really just prefer that. I am chubby myself and have no problem finding men who are interested. A few are good men. I am lucky. I also know men who are attracted to women who are full-figured, just not me. It's weeding through the losers that counts. Keep your standards high and good things will come along. IF you lose weight, do it for yourself and health, not to attract men. Men who are that superficial are not worth your time.
10/16/2012
Thumper Logic Thumper Logic
I agree with everything said above. You also have to have a positive attitude and love your own body. Everyone (both male and female) has certain things we would like to change about ourselves, but being comfortable in your own skin is immensely more attractive than being perfect. The guys who look beyond one-night perfection that takes 2 hours of prep are out there, just keep looking!
10/21/2012
poetprincess poetprincess
Quote:
Originally posted by lobstermanswife
I'm chubby and single. And I think until I'm no longer chubby, I'm going to stay single. Any advice for attracting quality men when I'm not at a perfect skinny weight?
I honestly agree with what everyone else has said, I also and chubby and at the time I am single due to my own personal issues with men. I have never in the past nor even now had issues with attracting a guy. Guys tend to love chubby girls. more to handle and to hang on to. Stay away trashy places like clubs and bars. All guys that hang out there want is free sex and sometimes they tend to go after chubby girls thinking they will be desperate enough to deal with their crap. Do not worry about your size its what is inside that counts and the right man will see it.
10/23/2012
nikki0668 nikki0668
I have found that there are a lot of men who prefer a little meat on our bones. To me, thin looks too fragile. I am chunky myself, and it doesn't bother me. I still find men who think I am attractive. Just keep looking. You'll find the right one.
11/27/2012
pandasauce pandasauce
Trust me, those men who want you only when you're skinny are not men who you want to end up dating or in any way "quality". Quality men either care absolutely nothing about how you look, or they love the way you are.

If you want to lose weight for YOURSELF or to feel healthier, or happier, THAT is the only reason you should do it. Never, ever to get a man. Think of it this way- say you get thin, you find a man, you get married and decide to have a child; you aren't going to be skinny then!

Just try and love yourself, and that's when you'll find someone to love you.
01/01/2013
gorgeous gorgeous
Theres a lot of men that don't want a skinny mini girl. You just have to find the one for you. If you have to change for someone to like you they aren't worth it.
01/15/2013
MrWill MrWill
Just saying: Not all men like smaller girls, just like not all men like bigger girls.


I find thicker/bigger girls more appealing, but I would date a small girl just the same.


Sell the product, not the package. Packages fall apart, get dirty, age. The contents will be just as nice after 50 years as they are on day 1, as long as they are cared for.
01/15/2013
kdlt kdlt
I'll just echo what everyone else is saying. It's easier to find quality men at a bigger weight (I've found) because they care less about how you end up looking and more about how you are on the inside. If you're super shallow about your men though, getting a shallow guy could work out okay.
01/15/2013
Total posts: 10
Unique posters: 10