Compulsive Buying Disorder for toys.

Contributor: Mr. John Mr. John
We have what I feel is a ridiculous number of toys. Most these toys have never been used, and are still in the original packaging. But, I still buy more. Most of it would be considered on the luxury side of quality. In addition, I have an armoire in which these toys are stored, as if they were on display in a store. Also, when I say we, it is just me doing the purchasing. My wife is very content with he Eroscillator, and what I perceive as a small number of other toys. In my defense, I think I believe that maybe the two of us might try finding new uncharted frontiers. So, is it just me that has this compulsive buying disorder? Does anyone come close to this behavior I have?
04/17/2013
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Contributor: MrWill MrWill
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr. John
We have what I feel is a ridiculous number of toys. Most these toys have never been used, and are still in the original packaging. But, I still buy more. Most of it would be considered on the luxury side of quality. In addition, I have an armoire in ... more
I know a lot of people that buy toys like that.. I personally don't.. I've gotten very picky about things, and often put things in my cart and wait for a day or so before I buy.
04/17/2013
Contributor: steelaster steelaster
I think there are never enough sex toys. If it starts interfering with your life (as in you're buying sex toys instead of paying rent or buying food) I think you're probably alright. I think most people have toys that they haven't really used but still buy more.
04/17/2013
Contributor: edeneve edeneve
I'm really, really wanting the higher end toys. I have a couple and they are amazing. not a one is a disappointment.
04/17/2013
Contributor: evie.amor evie.amor
I understand what you mean. While I don't have by any means a large collection (though I've only been purchasing sex toys for 5 or 6 months now), I do find myself constantly wanting to add new toys to my arsenal. I have purchased a couple that I realized I won't use. So now I'm trying to be more realistic. I also have hopes that I'll get to try new products with my man, but he is more conservative than me so I'm also realizing I have to be more realistic about that dream too.
04/17/2013
Contributor: jr2012 jr2012
I would say unless you're having financial issues, or can't walk though your house as the result of your toy collection, you're probably fine

It's okay to have a collection, almost everyone collects something! Though ceramic figurines will get less eyebrow raises than sex toys, of course.
04/17/2013
Contributor: quackbuster quackbuster
I agree with the above--unless it's causing problems in your marriage and/or with your finances, I don't think it's necessarily the worst thing in the world.

I was kind of like that for a while--I kept buying different items on sale (especially if I had points!), even if I didn't expect to use them a whole lot. I've gotten much pickier lately--I kind of viewed that as a test period when I wanted to try to figure out exactly what I looked for in a toy. Now that I have a better idea of what gets me off & what features I like, I'm less likely to buy something that doesn't look like it's up my alley, even if it gets great reviews & is very popular. At the same time, I make a point to try not to buy items that are super-similar to ones I already have...I figure there's really no need to have two very strong pinpoint g-spot stimulators, even if it is something that I enjoy!
04/17/2013
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
Unless it's causing you financial hardship, I wouldn't worry about it.
04/18/2013
Contributor: spineyogurt spineyogurt
I woulndt worry
04/18/2013
Contributor: Pumpk1nPatch Pumpk1nPatch
I think you're being compulsive. I feel that way because that's exactly how I am. I really don't need more, but I make purchases 1-2 times a week! I think I've bought about ten g-spot toys this month. I thought I'd stop at the Pure Wand, but nope. I need to get this in check as I am this way with many other things.
04/18/2013
Contributor: AmethystQueen AmethystQueen
I'm starting to feel the effects of being bitten by the sex toy bug. I don't have many now, but I'm constantly on the lookout for great deals and toys with great reviews! If I get it, it's GOT to work to bring me to orgasm, it's just gotta.
04/18/2013
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr. John
We have what I feel is a ridiculous number of toys. Most these toys have never been used, and are still in the original packaging. But, I still buy more. Most of it would be considered on the luxury side of quality. In addition, I have an armoire in ... more
LOL. I don't mean to laugh at your problem here, but reading that was so funny to me for some reason. Especially when you're like "we" then you say, "also, when I say we, it is just me doing the purchasing." Lol. Sorry. Okay. Serious time.

I'm sorry you're having some trouble here. I mean, I guess if you're feeling badly or overwhelmed by it all, you could give them away. Do you know people who will want them? You say most are still in the box! Sometimes I'll buy something not realizing it isn't a size I can use, and will leave it in the box and give to my sisters. I've had this happen with some kegel balls. As soon as they arrived, I could tell by looking at them they were way too big for me, so I gave them away in hopes my sisters might could use them.

As for a disorder, I can't help ya there. I don't know much about that sort of thing. I'm pretty good with managing my spending and buying only things I'm sure I want. Maybe even too good. I'll spend days sometimes more making sure I want it & if the want subsides, I won't let myself buy it! It's crazy. I'm sure there are others here who can relate to your side though.

One thing for me is I try to keep in mind how little room I have left in my huge toy box for storing them. That does help, plus I'm so picky about my toys that there's not a whole lot I could end up purchasing if I did go on a crazy buying spree. Lol.
04/18/2013
Contributor: Hummingbird Hummingbird
Oh definitely I'm there, not owning a car with all its expenses, I am way there.
04/18/2013
Contributor: Fluke Fluke
Sounds like sex toys are a hobby of yours so you buy lots of them, more than you need. You are now into the realm of being a sex toy collector in addition to being a sex toy user. People collect stamps and action figures, why not sex toys.
04/18/2013
Contributor: SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
There is no such thing as having too many, and just because you haven't used some doesn't mean you won't use them sometime in the future. That is my philosophy.

I seem to have a similar thing going on here, when ever I do a purchase the order usually has between 5 and 10 different toys I wouldn't say that it is a compulsive buying disorder but getting great deals on items that I absolutely want.
04/18/2013
Contributor: dancingduo dancingduo
I don't understand why some are still in the package!
04/18/2013
Contributor: TJtheMadHatter TJtheMadHatter
Quote:
Originally posted by Fluke
Sounds like sex toys are a hobby of yours so you buy lots of them, more than you need. You are now into the realm of being a sex toy collector in addition to being a sex toy user. People collect stamps and action figures, why not sex toys.
That's pretty much how I feel. They're my only real splurge and I'm only at the beginning of "collecting". Sex toys are the only thing that are solely mine. I mean my husband will play with me and use a toy on me, but they're still mine. I don't buy a lot of things for myself outside of sex toys. I'm usually buying things for our toddler.
04/18/2013
Contributor: spiced spiced
YES. I've been exactly where you are and I have a pretty good idea what the problem is. It's the "Wheel of Desire".

Tell me if this sounds familiar... You see something, and you want it. You imagine that having it will give you satisfaction. You buy it, and at the moment you buy it, you feel good. Satisfied... but then you get the thing, and find you're NOT satisfied. You couldn't care less about the thing. You find a new thing. You see it. You want it. You imagine that having it will give you satisfaction...

This is something A LOT of people are afflicted with. It's not treated as a problem by society — in fact, it's ENCOURAGED — because it helps to keep the consumer-driven economy humming along. But I believe it's harmful to people, and ultimately, to all of us. How to overcome it?

The first step is to RECOGNIZE that it's happening. Then, when you feel the compulsive craving to buy, REMIND yourself of how this has worked out in the past (i.e., not very well). BREATHE deeply, reminding yourself that you have everything you need. If you still crave the item, WAIT 24 hours before buying it, and continue to recognize, remind and breathe deeply as much as possible during the waiting time.

You will probably find meditation helpful to learn to accept yourself as you are, and to learn to be satisfied with what you have. Once you cultivate this acceptance and satisfaction, you will find that you don't crave stuff as much as you used to, and you will learn to identify which cravings are just compulsive, and which arise from a genuine need. You can start RIGHT NOW. Here's a simple 3-step guide: link

I hope this is helpful to you! The products on Eden can bring a lot of happiness to your life — but only if you learn to ignore mindless craving and buy only what you actually NEED.
04/18/2013
Contributor: Mr. John Mr. John
Quote:
Originally posted by spiced
YES. I've been exactly where you are and I have a pretty good idea what the problem is. It's the "Wheel of Desire".

Tell me if this sounds familiar... You see something, and you want it. You imagine that having it will give ... more
Dear Spiced,

Thank you for your thoughtful response, including your link to the three step guide.

It can be a blurred line between knowing what you need, and what you want.
04/20/2013
Contributor: evie.amor evie.amor
Quote:
Originally posted by quackbuster
I agree with the above--unless it's causing problems in your marriage and/or with your finances, I don't think it's necessarily the worst thing in the world.

I was kind of like that for a while--I kept buying different items on ... more
I agree with quackbuster, when I first found this site I wanted to try everything! So I bought different products and some I liked and some I didn't, and now I buy with more discerning taste.
04/20/2013
Contributor: sunflower sunflower
I think even if I had that kind of disposable income that I would still be conscientious with buying toys that would be useful. But I'd definitely buy more of the neat looking toys with cute designs that didn't get awesome reviews.
04/21/2013
Contributor: spiced spiced
Quote:
Originally posted by evie.amor
I agree with quackbuster, when I first found this site I wanted to try everything! So I bought different products and some I liked and some I didn't, and now I buy with more discerning taste.
You're very welcome.

I agree, want / need can get blurry, but by practicing mindfulness — in other words, by learning to be more and more aware of our thoughts, emotions, and actions — the difference can become MUCH clearer.
04/22/2013
Contributor: babyrock babyrock
Well, I figure if it makes your relationship better then as long as it's financially affordable then you should be free to do whatever you want.
05/07/2013
Contributor: sunflower sunflower
Quote:
Originally posted by spiced
YES. I've been exactly where you are and I have a pretty good idea what the problem is. It's the "Wheel of Desire".

Tell me if this sounds familiar... You see something, and you want it. You imagine that having it will give ... more
This was a really great post. Thanks!

I think if you have so many toys that you're filling an armoire then maybe you should try to get rid of some? Unused toys that are still in the package could probably do well being sold on Eden classifieds.... and don't take that money and buy new toys LOL!
05/08/2013