Question from Loving Husband

Question from Loving Husband

Ken Ken
I am still not sure what the ideal toy for my wife would be. First, I should tell you that I am incredibly in love with my wife, and also submissive to her. We have what is called an "Around Her Finger" marriage based on the (somewhat) famous blog of the same name. As such, I try to make our time together all about her pleasure. She "manages" my orgasms, and often times she does not even allow that I climax when we are together. However, we have a great deal of intimacy. I give her full body massages very often. These have typically ended with me providing her oral sex to climax, but they also have often involved intercourse where I wear a vibrating cock ring allowing me to remain periodically motionless inside of her thus allowing for maximum intimacy and maximum pleasure for her.

I am writing now because I want to incorporate new toys into our massages. I have a small clitoral stimulator that she likes, but it will not remain in place while I massage, for example, her neck and shoulders. I have purchased a couple of vibrators with no luck. One was a rabbit...which was way too big... she rejected it right away. The other was a soft gel vibrator which she hasn't seemed to like either... it seems to make her uncomfortable. What do you recommend that I could use on her while still finishing the massage? I have looked at the we vibe ii, and also the Je Joue G-ki... but I'm uncertain that these will be ideal. She is small framed if that makes a difference in any suggestion.

Thank you in advance for your consideration in responding to my post.

K
08/23/2010
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Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
I am still not sure what the ideal toy for my wife would be. First, I should tell you that I am incredibly in love with my wife, and also submissive to her. We have what is called an "Around Her Finger" marriage based on the (somewhat) ...
I'm sure you'll get some great suggestions here, but before I can respond, I have a question. How does she prefer to be pleasured or finish while you're massaging her? You mention both a clitoral stimulator and an inserted toy - are you looking for something for penetration or just to use on her clit?
08/23/2010
Ken Ken
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
I'm sure you'll get some great suggestions here, but before I can respond, I have a question. How does she prefer to be pleasured or finish while you're massaging her? You mention both a clitoral stimulator and an inserted toy - are you ...
That's a very good question... multiple "endings" have worked very well. I used to spend a great amount of time giving her oral sex at the end of the massage, and after multiple orgasms, I would typically penetrate her... which (I think as a result of the extended oral sex) led to even more orgasms even without much thrusting involved. I then worked my way to the vibrating cock ring, and experimented with the other toys after that. It seems like the actual penetration is not necessary for orgasm, but as a submissive, there is something very appealing to me about using a penetrating toy on her instead of penetrating her myself. Therefore, I'd like to find a toy that had least had a penetration component to it.
08/23/2010
Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
That's a very good question... multiple "endings" have worked very well. I used to spend a great amount of time giving her oral sex at the end of the massage, and after multiple orgasms, I would typically penetrate her... which (I ...
If you've had success with the vibrating cock rings, bear in mind they can always be put on a simple slimline vibe which you may already have. If you don't, my personal favorite is this one: link. The traditional shaped vibrators come in so many sizes that there really is one out there for anyone, and they're generally affordable enough to keep trying until you find the right one. Problematically, they still might not stay in well.

You could also attempt a traditional vibrator with a little texture, anywhere from the Evolved Bliss to one of the shaped silicone Fun Factory toys (if you have a preference toward silicone). Also, if she prefers a more 'natural' feeling experience, a dildo that holds a bullet vibe like the Vibrating Champlette would probably work well, and you could again put a vibrating ring around any non-vibrating dildo. Unfortunately, these still will need to be thrusted or held in place.

Lastly, this may be a stretch coordination wise, but I've seen trickier things done with great results. They make harnesses that fit around the thigh that can also fit most other part of the body - arm, lower leg, etc. If there's a position you could massage her in with one of your legs attached to a harnessed vibrating or non-vibrating dildo, you could lightly thrust, allow her to move onto it, or just keep it in place (with or without a bullet and with or without a ring) and that would solve your problem about toys not staying in place. I'm not sure how this would fit into the submissive role you take on in the relationship since everyone's balance is different, but it might be worth a try if it sounds like something she'd like.

Hope this helps
08/23/2010
Pleasure Piratess Pleasure Piratess
Have you considered a glass toy that you can experiment with temperature play/g-spotting? And as mentioned before, many times you can use a vibrating cock ring on a penetrating toy so it is multi-function.
08/23/2010
Ken Ken
Quote:
Originally posted by Pleasure Piratess
Have you considered a glass toy that you can experiment with temperature play/g-spotting? And as mentioned before, many times you can use a vibrating cock ring on a penetrating toy so it is multi-function.
I have not considered it... is a glass toy something most women are comfortable using if lubed properly? I guess when I started asking this question, I thought I would get recommendations for curved toys that allowed both g-spot and clitoral stimulation AND would stay in place during the massage. Or... some comments on the we vibe ii which seems like an ideal toy for this situation.

I appreciate all the out of the box thinking... please keep it coming.
08/23/2010
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
How about a strap on butterfly like this one or something similar?
08/23/2010
DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
I have not considered it... is a glass toy something most women are comfortable using if lubed properly? I guess when I started asking this question, I thought I would get recommendations for curved toys that allowed both g-spot and clitoral ...
My vaginal canal is very tight, I can't even take "regular" sized dildos comfortably, and I find that most glass toys work very well for me because they are so slick. If you do go that route, i'd recommend using a toy with some texture because I find that the straight untextured ones are difficult to keep in place.

Best of luck
08/23/2010
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Since your gal likes oral - I'd second the suggestion about using a dildo for internal stimulation while going down on her. Our favs are:
Njoy Pure Wand: link
Fun Factory Alumina Flow: link
Various glass toys like these: link link link

Sounds like your having fun!
08/23/2010
Pleasure Piratess Pleasure Piratess
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
I have not considered it... is a glass toy something most women are comfortable using if lubed properly? I guess when I started asking this question, I thought I would get recommendations for curved toys that allowed both g-spot and clitoral ...
it is my personal experience that glass actually requires no lube (for vaginal insertion) since it is so slick and does not absorb your body's natural lube. However, if you prefer to use lube anyway, it is compatible with anything. If there are any issues with comfort, it is usually that glass has no give and you have to be a little more gaurded in hard thrusting so as not to bruise the cervix... although that is also the case with most any type of solid toy you are inserting.
They come in so many shapes and textures your head will spin, lol.
For example, this is popular g-spotter... both ends are usable, creating two different sensations
link
And this one has textured nubs, but there are also ones with swirls, bulbs, and a variety of other textures from mild to extreme...
link
08/23/2010
socceras socceras
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
I am still not sure what the ideal toy for my wife would be. First, I should tell you that I am incredibly in love with my wife, and also submissive to her. We have what is called an "Around Her Finger" marriage based on the (somewhat) ...
You should probably let her pick something out
04/29/2011
M121212 M121212
Wow there are some really amazing recommendations on this thread!

Ken, I initially thought you could get her some kind of small external vibrator that she could lie on while you're massaging, such as the Mimi.

Good luck, and we'd love to hear how it turned out ^.^
04/30/2011
newfoundlust newfoundlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Ken
I am still not sure what the ideal toy for my wife would be. First, I should tell you that I am incredibly in love with my wife, and also submissive to her. We have what is called an "Around Her Finger" marriage based on the (somewhat) ...
A little off from vibrators, but take a look at the Liberator line of stuff. Their pillows have turned a lot of our positions from "that was nice" to wow. She really likes being able to relax as she is supported in different positions.
04/30/2011
Teaser Teaser
My wife REALLY likes the Better Than Chocolate link, and she has actually used it while I have given her massages. I think she could probably lay on it, but she just used it while she was on her back.
04/30/2011
Total posts: 14
Unique posters: 10