Losing focus and arousal

Contributor: gigglinggargoyles gigglinggargoyles
Lately, when my partner and I are messing around, I start to get very distracted. I naturally have a busy mind, but my mind starts to wander in the middle of foreplay and my arousal level just drops and doesn't really recover. I don't seem to get very 'excited" and it bothers me because things that could be really great end up feeling sort of meh because I'm not aroused. Help??
06/17/2010
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Contributor: Ciao. Ciao.
Hmm, a busy mind can be hard to deal with. Is it specific concerns you have? Are you just bored with how the "messing around" is working (or not working) for you? Are you just not letting yourself really get into the moment?

I would say try and relax yourself before getting down to having some fun, really set the mood and get your mind focused on pleasure, sort of like you would ready yourself to go to bed. I have a busy mind too, but I find meditation works wonders if you can do that, otherwise simply try and engage yourself in the moment and focus on particular feelings instead of letting your mind wander.
06/17/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by gigglinggargoyles
Lately, when my partner and I are messing around, I start to get very distracted. I naturally have a busy mind, but my mind starts to wander in the middle of foreplay and my arousal level just drops and doesn't really recover. I don't seem to ... more
If Boink's quite excellent advice doesn't work you should contact your gynocologist or general doctor since this could be a hormonal issue as well. Stress plays havok withour bodies as does the natural process of getting older, sometimes you just need a bit of support hormonally. Could be a testosterone creme could help. Were I you I would try relaxing and refocussing before sex. Take a bubble bath, get some good sleep, talk to someone about your problems...sometimes that can be all you need. If you try all this and still feel Meh then talk to your doctor. Arousal problems seem to be the female equivalent of ED and you deserve to be happy and sexually satisfied!
Good luck!
06/18/2010