This is embarrassing ...

This happened to us when the wife was around 28-29. Before that she would have a rather large wet spot during/after sex. Not sure the reason and all but I know she still is "Into it" as she has more/better orgasms since then. The only time she can get that wet is when I fool around with her while she is sleeping. There are times when she asks for this so I am not sure if it is anticipation on her part or the fact that she is totally relaxed.

As I see you are about the same age I would guess it has something to do with age. I am sure some of the other gals will chime in.

In my head; I've never really said this out loud before because people might be offended and many would disagree... but I consider this to be the female equivalent to a man not being able to get it up. I mean we are ready to go, the anticipation is there, the arousal is there, our heads, hearts and the majority of our body are ready to go. But... the one sure fire way our partners can tell if we are "truly" into it is if we are wet. And if we are not wet, they think we are not really "there".

We do have it easier in one regard. Lube.

I know for me, at various points in my cycle I am more wet and at some points in my cycle I am clawing at any man I meet trying to strip him... but I am not wet at all. I know for the past fourish months I've gotten horny and aroused but just have not been able to get wet enough for sex or for masturbation but this is due to some personal problems I've been going through. At various times in a woman's life this will happen to her.

It is natural.

There are a lot of men out there that even though they've been married for a while, think they know a woman's body. The worst part is, a woman's body is constantly changing due to hormones, what we eat, how we feel, how others see us, how our partners see us... and as stupid as it sounds, even innocent comments can have an effect on us.

My mother said it best, "Think of it like this. Every seven years you basically get a new body. Well, every five to seven years your body changes so does changes the way your body responds. Congrats! You can either see this as an adventure to rediscover yourself, or a curse. Your choice."

I can see his point, but just walking away mad is ridiculous. A girl wouldn't do that if a guy couldn't get it up. He should have just walked out to get lube and come back in.

Ouch!! That is why they make lube--sometimes our bodies betray us, especially with the lubrication issue. When I do not get as wet, my orgasms seem stronger...odd but true. Let your partner know that wet has no bearing on being turned on or into it--your reactions and words do.

I started having that problem after I had my son. As I've gotten older, it's gotten to where I don't make much of my own lubrication at all anymore. I used to get soaked, but now not so much. We just always use lube now. When I noticed it started to become a problem I complained about it to my husband, basically saying I didn't understand why I wasn't lubricating anymore. From me complaining about it he knew it wasn't him. He's never stopped because of it.

I'll also chime in that I orgasm harder now that I don't get as wet. Not sure why that is, but apparently it happens to many people judging from the responses.

I'm sorry to hear this happened to you. If there is an occasional -or even frequent issue with natural lubrication, the answer is simply add some of your favorite 'artificial' lube.

Liken it to dry eyes - just pop some drops in and everything is fine.

It's too bad he doesn't educate himself - so I guess it will fall on you to educate him that things like this happen normally.

Just wait until he's in his 50s and can't keep an erection - are you going to run out the door? No - likely just get a little Viagra or Cialis and move on.

Women can be soaking wet if they're not turned on and they can be dry as a bone if they're about to explode. There are a lot of factors that can contribute.

Make sure you are well hydrated too. If I've been drinking and am dehydrated I don't get as wet. And tell your husband to stop being so mean! That only makes it harder.