Would you give your child a sex toy?

Contributor: CustomShop CustomShop
My daughter has been asking me for a sex toy. I'm not really comfortable with her having one. She's 15 but I'm not sure.
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Lvstoplay , PadoruLover , wrecklesswords , icyqueen , HouseWench , Kitten has left the site , TheToyGuy , catt , Sir , louise83
10  (83%)
OH&W, Lovebears , Vnessa
2  (17%)
Total votes: 12
Poll is open
03/26/2014
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Contributor: dv8 dv8
Not giving her one isn't going to make her not masturbate. A sex toy should prevent various household objects and fresh produce from having unintended uses.
03/27/2014
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by dv8
Not giving her one isn't going to make her not masturbate. A sex toy should prevent various household objects and fresh produce from having unintended uses.
I totally agree. I know I found other objects that could be "mis"used as a sex toy when I was in my teens - battery operated tooth brushes, razor handles with the blade end removed, etc.
03/28/2014
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by CustomShop
My daughter has been asking me for a sex toy. I'm not really comfortable with her having one. She's 15 but I'm not sure.
I vote yes, but they would have to be a certain age. I think 15 or 16 is a good age. The fact that she is open enough to want to share this with you I think is a good thign.

What makes you uncomfortable with her having one? Just the idea that she could be getting into the wild world of sex and all of the potential drama, heartache, and unintended pregnancy that could happen?

I think you should get her something simple for a beginner. Hell, maybe have her browse this site for something and then whenever you get it, teach her how to care for it and give her a box of condoms.

Then again, I can't help but think that yeah, that would squick me out a bit, but I think in the long run, it would be a good way to connect with your child and let them know that you are always open and willing to listen.
04/01/2014
Contributor: HouseWench HouseWench
I might not buy it myself, but I'd probably point her to someone that would. I bought my 15 year old sister-in-law one though.
05/13/2014
Contributor: Kitten has left the site Kitten has left the site
I wouldn't mind buying a sex toy for a future daughter. I won't hide the fact that there's such thing as sex in this world and that there are toys for it. She'll find out sooner or later, and asking me may prevent going behind my back and buying them herself, underage.
05/13/2014
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
This is very interesting.

It conflicts with my moral and ethical natures not to mention the social norms I'm accustomed too.

Considering my sexual proclivities I would say if my child (I do not have any [that I know of] at the moment) wanted a sex toy I would give them one no real questions asked. This is assuming I have already explained/given a sex and reproduction [birds and the bees] talk.
10/04/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
This is very interesting.

It conflicts with my moral and ethical natures not to mention the social norms I'm accustomed too.

Considering my sexual proclivities I would say if my child (I do not have any [that I know of] at the ... more
In continuation but on a slightly different slant to things above...

If I were to consider giving a sex toy (or aid) to a young person (minor [under 16 years]) who is not family or some other form of being related to me.

I would, as a person, not give a sex toy to a minor because I believe it to be a very grey area on the border of things like paedophilia and sexual misconduct.

But, as a nurse, if a minor came to me and asked me for a sexual aid/toy I would probably provide such an item or direct them to a source that they can legally obtain said item from.

It is a very conflicting but interesting concept.
10/04/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Oh boy, this one is an interesting topic. Full disclosure, I don't have nor want any children at the moment. My partner is also on board with this idea so we are good to go!

After much deliberation on the issue, I think I would however only under certain conditions. Age would be an issue, also I would want the minor to understand the ramifications of sex. As others have mentioned Sex Education, I will parrot that thought. I would cautiously encourage the minor to explore their sexuality but do it cautiously until they are the age of majority in their location. They must also know and understand the no only the importance of practicing safer sexual methods but use them when the time comes.

I'd also like to encourage masturbation and tell them not to ever let anyone shame them about it.
10/04/2015
Contributor: symbiasin symbiasin
This is one loaded question! By saying at least not yet, you are not denying sex is there, or avoiding pg or anything. I would say go with your gut feeling and tell her that she's too young, right now.
10/04/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
There is another perspective to consider with this question. On the other end of the spectrum, as the question is worded, "Would you give your child a sex toy", I would not. If I had an adult child i.e. 18yrs or older, I would expect my child to purchase their own. I'd be more than happy to discuss the toy and its capabilities with my child if they chose to discuss it with me.

After all, we are all somebody's child and we all have parents.
10/04/2015
Contributor: OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
No. Like many many other things in life, they will learn on their own. Irregardless of their age. Teaching how to drive, yes. How to play tennis etc, yes.

No need to tell me. I know I'm as usual.
10/04/2015
Contributor: ChasityMurvine ChasityMurvine
It would all depend on age....at 15-16 yea I think I would....hell its better than her going out and having sex with random boys and getting pregnant...but a small vibe or dildo just for her to "play with"
10/04/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by ChasityMurvine
It would all depend on age....at 15-16 yea I think I would....hell its better than her going out and having sex with random boys and getting pregnant...but a small vibe or dildo just for her to "play with"
Playing the devils advocate (of sorts):

Is age even all that important?

I've seen girls as young as 13-14 pregnant. We have/had a 12 year old giving birth to her 15 year old boyfriends child here in Australia.

So is setting an age on this sort of thing THAT important?
10/07/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
Playing the devils advocate (of sorts):

Is age even all that important?

I've seen girls as young as 13-14 pregnant. We have/had a 12 year old giving birth to her 15 year old boyfriends child here in Australia.

So is setting ... more
True, here in the states, that sort of thing happens too. Young pregnancy occurs everywhere in the world and I don't mean 18-19 yr olds either. *SMH*
10/07/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
True, here in the states, that sort of thing happens too. Young pregnancy occurs everywhere in the world and I don't mean 18-19 yr olds either. *SMH*
More and more "young" teens [under 16] are entering the maternity ward each year.
10/09/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
More and more "young" teens [under 16] are entering the maternity ward each year.
I checked and I believe the Antenatal clinic of the hospital has been dealing with a lot of high risk, high possibility of complications.



But regarding toys, would it help or would it hinder?
10/15/2015
Contributor: catt catt
Quote:
Originally posted by CustomShop
My daughter has been asking me for a sex toy. I'm not really comfortable with her having one. She's 15 but I'm not sure.
I raised two sons who are not comfortable with talking about sexuality with their mother. But of course they start out with their own toys. If I had a girl, I think the subject would have been easier to keep going past the facts of life.

Girls will not stop masturbating and experimenting because they do not have a toy. They will also not keep themselves away from sexual partners. I think if a young girl wants to experiment on her own, then she should be encouraged to use a safe toy. She will turn to a partner when she's ready, but let her now that she has other options.

Interpersonal relationships have so much more to do with emotions than they do with sex. The toy can let her learn without emotional baggage.
10/18/2015
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
No. Like many many other things in life, they will learn on their own. Irregardless of their age. Teaching how to drive, yes. How to play tennis etc, yes.

No need to tell me. I know I'm as usual.
So you would rather your child do things in an unsafe manner, like using other household items that may rip apart her vaginal canal.

I would rather buy my child something safe. They're going to do it whether I like it or not, and frankly, I don't care whether they are or not. It's their body, their choice. As long as they are not doing it publicly or unsafely, then I don't care.
10/18/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
So you would rather your child do things in an unsafe manner, like using other household items that may rip apart her vaginal canal.

I would rather buy my child something safe. They're going to do it whether I like it or not, and frankly, ... more
Brrr, shiver, seen that at work.

I believe this thread has delved into three BIG issues. Correct me if I'm wrong:

1) The idea of giving a child (teen/young adult) sex toys leads to safer sex concepts.

2) By giving a child (teen/young adult) sex toys may prevent them from performing unsafe sexual experimentation.

But it should be noted a conflicting point of view is evident.

3) By giving a child (teen/young adult) sex toys increases/decreases their desire to sex out a sexual partner, [or at least increases their understanding of sex with a partner].
10/18/2015
Contributor: edenite edenite
I would educate...safety, materials, cleaning, etc. Creating an open dialogue for questions and info to help her choose a toy wisely (along with the convo you've probably already had regarding sex and masturbation in general) I would discuss safe places that they can be purchased.

As far as buying it for them directly...no. Even though i wouldn't be upset knowing a teenager had a sex toy, I would NOT even want to know what said toy looked like, much less buy it for them. It would "squick" me out a bit. grabbed that word from @wrecklesswords! lol

Couldn't you just provide her with the means to purchase one safely and privately? I'm thinking gift card for an online store.
10/19/2015
Contributor: edenite edenite
Quote:
Originally posted by wrecklesswords
I vote yes, but they would have to be a certain age. I think 15 or 16 is a good age. The fact that she is open enough to want to share this with you I think is a good thign.

What makes you uncomfortable with her having one? Just the idea ... more
"squick! thank you for that word! lol I've never heard that before.
10/19/2015
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by edenite
I would educate...safety, materials, cleaning, etc. Creating an open dialogue for questions and info to help her choose a toy wisely (along with the convo you've probably already had regarding sex and masturbation in general) I would discuss safe ... more
No. People under the age of majority are not allowed to buy sex toys either online or in person. They could get in trouble legally if discovered.
10/19/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
No. People under the age of majority are not allowed to buy sex toys either online or in person. They could get in trouble legally if discovered.
We have so many sex laws in Australia, basically we say 18 to buy. But that is far too late for what we are discussing here.
10/20/2015
Contributor: Vnessa Vnessa
This is a very interesting topic, one that I have been following for days, trying to see exactly where I stand. Since I have a recently turned 16 year old daughter, it's so hard for me to put my over protective feelings aside (for her) and say yes, I would. If I wasn't a parent, it would be so easy for me to think very light heartedly, be very open minded since I know my own sexual preferences, I see what others are saying about the safety side of it--understand it and agree, so why not just buy it. However, when it comes to having an actual young teenage daughter that you are hoping waits a little longer for sexual activity, trying to guide them into making appropriate choices for their age, I don't think I would be so quick and easy to run out and buy a toy for her. At least not yet. I think it may be too young.
10/20/2015
Contributor: Lvstoplay Lvstoplay
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
This is a very interesting topic, one that I have been following for days, trying to see exactly where I stand. Since I have a recently turned 16 year old daughter, it's so hard for me to put my over protective feelings aside (for her) and say ... more
It's not too young. Trust me, if she understands more about sex and is willing and able to talk to you openly and honestly about sex and sexual activity without feeling embarrassed or ashamed she's much less likely to be asking friends, searching the internet, or getting information from other potentially misleading sources. She's needs the open and honest relationship with you. Buying her a toy won't encourage her to find a guy to meet her needs, but it will make her feel more secure in the fact that she can honestly bring her concerns to you. If she's asking or seems interested, then it's honestly best to get one for her, and it's safer for her than trying to find other objects or people who are willing to explore her sexuality with her or meet her sexual needs.
10/21/2015
Contributor: Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Lvstoplay
It's not too young. Trust me, if she understands more about sex and is willing and able to talk to you openly and honestly about sex and sexual activity without feeling embarrassed or ashamed she's much less likely to be asking friends, ... more
Very valid points
10/21/2015
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by TheToyGuy
We have so many sex laws in Australia, basically we say 18 to buy. But that is far too late for what we are discussing here.
Exactly, hence why I said they couldn't buy one for themselves as that person suggested. The parent would HAVE to buy it for them.
10/21/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
Very valid points
Ditto.
10/21/2015