The New Intimacy

What's the worst toy advice you've heard/received?

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Contributor: Sassybunny85 Sassybunny85
When I saw someone say they were spraying Febreze on a porous jelly toy, it got my mind churning. I personally think that it's a bad idea because of the potential for irritation, but that might just be me.

As far as the worst thing I've heard someone tell me, it's got to be that toys don't need to be washed before or after using. And this was someone who stored them in the couch cushions!

Anyone else care to share?
01/27/2010
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Contributor: Kynky Kytty Kynky Kytty
Quote:
Originally posted by Sassybunny85
When I saw someone say they were spraying Febreze on a porous jelly toy, it got my mind churning. I personally think that it's a bad idea because of the potential for irritation, but that might just be me.

As far as the worst thing ... more
I actually do not have any horror stories like that, and only wanted to comment.

Was that actually written in a review on this site? That is soooo nasty. And yet it's so bad, almost comical, and I'm trying not to laugh.
01/27/2010
Contributor: TitsMcScandal TitsMcScandal
I never really got horror story advice, but I was told that jelly was the safest material. So, that's obviously false...
01/28/2010
Contributor: Sassybunny85 Sassybunny85
Quote:
Originally posted by Kynky Kytty
I actually do not have any horror stories like that, and only wanted to comment.

Was that actually written in a review on this site? That is soooo nasty. And yet it's so bad, almost comical, and I'm trying not to laugh.
Yes. It was someone applying to be an advanced reviewer, and I pointed out spraying a toy, especially jelly ones with Febreze is a bad bad idea.
01/28/2010
Contributor: LikeSunshineDust LikeSunshineDust
It wasn't advice to me, but I saw it written in a review quite some time ago. It was a review for a UR3 dildo and the reviewer said they used it anally, vaginally and orally, with no mention of condoms or cleaning. I'm a bit nauseous thinking about it again.
01/28/2010
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
Quote:
Originally posted by LikeSunshineDust
It wasn't advice to me, but I saw it written in a review quite some time ago. It was a review for a UR3 dildo and the reviewer said they used it anally, vaginally and orally, with no mention of condoms or cleaning. I'm a bit nauseous thinking ... more
As long as they did it in the right order and then tossed it in the trash at the end...
01/28/2010
Contributor: LikeSunshineDust LikeSunshineDust
Quote:
Originally posted by Jimbo Jones
As long as they did it in the right order and then tossed it in the trash at the end...
Yea, 'cept I don't think they did.
01/28/2010
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
Quote:
Originally posted by LikeSunshineDust
Yea, 'cept I don't think they did.
I didn't think so either, but I was throwing it out there because there is a way to do things semi-safe, but condom use would have been a VERY good thing to mention.
01/28/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
"It's okay if it's not flared at the end, you can stick it in your ass anyhow."
01/28/2010
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
"It's okay if it's not flared at the end, you can stick it in your ass anyhow."
Yeah, I know a lot of people think that the whole flared base thing is being "overly cautious" but even if that's your personal belief I think it's a little irresponsible to put on a review. Actually, I think it's just kind of bad advice even if it's not for a review. It's one thing to practice something yourself and another to recommend it to someone else...
01/28/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
"If anal play hurts, just keep going. It's like having vaginal sex for the first time, you just have to push through the pain, and it will get better. If you're one of those super-sensitive girls, use a desensitizing lube, it'll make it feel better!"

Thank goodness I didn't try to follow this advice with anything larger than an Aneros Peridise. And for once, I'm glad I'm so stubborn that I absolutely refused to make my life "easier" with desensitizing lubes!

Ditto to the "no flange = still safe" comments. That's NOT something you just go around telling people, regardless of what you do in your free time. For most people, it's just a bad idea.
01/28/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
"It's okay if it's not flared at the end, you can stick it in your ass anyhow."
LOL!!!
01/28/2010
Contributor: Envy Envy
It wasn't for a toy, but on Bad Dragon someone suggested a pinch of baking soda added to the lube when lubing up a toy for anal. That just seems like so many kinds of wrong to me.
01/29/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
I've never received any toy advice...
01/29/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
It wasn't for a toy, but on Bad Dragon someone suggested a pinch of baking soda added to the lube when lubing up a toy for anal. That just seems like so many kinds of wrong to me.
Actually, it's very sound advice. Baking soda acts as a pH buffer - if the pH of a fluid isn't balanced right, it can cause a mild burning sensation in mucus membranes like those in the butt. It also acts as an odor absorber. On top of that, it thins mucus a bit (in some people, thick, slightly dried mucus like that the butt produces can end up a bit sticky and resistive during anal play; hooray for gliding!). And it helps keep any fungi from getting holed away back there and growing. The small amount of baking soda is very gentle, too. (Sinus rinses, which are used in the sinus cavity against some very delicate mucus membranes, often use a similar amount of baking soda)

So, a tiny amount of baking soda in your anal lube isn't an awful idea. It's not necessary by any means, but it may help with a few different things, and as long as you don't overdo it, it won't hurt you.
01/29/2010
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
"It's okay if it's not flared at the end, you can stick it in your ass anyhow."
Guilty as charged.
Actually, I always try to be very careful and clear when presenting this in my reviews so that people understand that it is something to be careful about and there are safer ways to carry it out
01/29/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Some of the lube substitutes I've heard suggested were just plain awful, especially since everything I'll list was suggested at some point for vaginal play.

Vaseline. Butter. Crisco. Olive oil. Shaving cream. Hair conditioner. Sweat. Toothpaste. Liquid medication. Candle wax. Soap. Laundry Detergent.

The only one I ever tried, as a desperate and naive young teen, was hair conditioner. It was rather unpleasant afterward. No matter how little I knew about lube, the rest just sounded creepy and dangerous. Toothpaste? Laundry detergent? MEDICATION?!
01/31/2010
Contributor: Sassybunny85 Sassybunny85
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
Some of the lube substitutes I've heard suggested were just plain awful, especially since everything I'll list was suggested at some point for vaginal play.

Vaseline. Butter. Crisco. Olive oil. Shaving cream. Hair conditioner. Sweat. ... more
Well, if it was Robitussin used, then I'm sure it would have been a good time for all. LOL. That is so gross to even consider.
01/31/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Sassybunny85
Well, if it was Robitussin used, then I'm sure it would have been a good time for all. LOL. That is so gross to even consider.
Hahah I'll bet. Funny as it sounds, the very thought has my poor vagina crying in fear.
01/31/2010
Contributor: Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
Actually, it's very sound advice. Baking soda acts as a pH buffer - if the pH of a fluid isn't balanced right, it can cause a mild burning sensation in mucus membranes like those in the butt. It also acts as an odor absorber. On top of that, ... more
^ This was an awesome bit of information. I never knew! Thanks for educating me, Luscious Lily
01/31/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Cinnamon
^ This was an awesome bit of information. I never knew! Thanks for educating me, Luscious Lily
*bows* I live but to serve.

You know, a paste of baking soda and water might be a good way to de-stinkify anal toys... must look into this. *ponder ponder ponder*
01/31/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
*bows* I live but to serve.

You know, a paste of baking soda and water might be a good way to de-stinkify anal toys... must look into this. *ponder ponder ponder*
What about Cyberskin? Because Cyberskin, ugh, it smells rancid.
01/31/2010
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
What about Cyberskin? Because Cyberskin, ugh, it smells rancid.
I don't have any cyberskin, so I couldn't test it out. Logically, if the smell is part of the material, it probably won't go away no matter what you do. If it's something leeching out of the material (yuck!), deodorizing it somehow might be a temporary fix so you don't smell it while you're using it, but it'll just keep leeching out over the long term. If it's a smell that it's picked up, then the baking soda idea might actually work. It's just an idea, I haven't had a chance to test it, but feel free to try! (no guarantees to what it will or won't do to delicate materials, though. Baking soda's gentle, but some things are just freakishly sensitive)
01/31/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
I don't have any cyberskin, so I couldn't test it out. Logically, if the smell is part of the material, it probably won't go away no matter what you do. If it's something leeching out of the material (yuck!), deodorizing it somehow ... more
Cyberskin, I'm not sure of. It's a fairly sensitive material. I'll try it out on a bit of it though, to see if it works. That's why I've been wanting to try Vixskin to see if its feel is as realistic as cyberskin, because it lacks the horrid scent.
01/31/2010
Contributor: Maiden Maiden
Quote:
Originally posted by Sassybunny85
When I saw someone say they were spraying Febreze on a porous jelly toy, it got my mind churning. I personally think that it's a bad idea because of the potential for irritation, but that might just be me.

As far as the worst thing ... more
I read that review, and the reviewer was not suggesting that you use Febreze to clean the toy itself. I know the writing was a bit confusing, but what they meant was that they use Febreze to cover up the odor that it left in the air and on the bedding.
02/01/2010
Contributor: Sassybunny85 Sassybunny85
Quote:
Originally posted by Maiden
I read that review, and the reviewer was not suggesting that you use Febreze to clean the toy itself. I know the writing was a bit confusing, but what they meant was that they use Febreze to cover up the odor that it left in the air and on the ... more
I think that should have been made more clear.
02/04/2010
Contributor: Sundae Sundae
Quote:
Originally posted by Sassybunny85
Well, if it was Robitussin used, then I'm sure it would have been a good time for all. LOL. That is so gross to even consider.
Oh man I'm allergic to Robitussin, so the thought of having that slathered down in my lady garden just makes me cringe in the worst way. Yuck!
02/04/2010
Contributor: Maiden Maiden
Quote:
Originally posted by Sassybunny85
I think that should have been made more clear.
Oh, don't get me wrong, the writing was confusing. I just thought people should know that she wasn't saying to clean toys with Febreze. It is an interesting topic... worst sex advice given. That being said, if you are gonna call some one out in the forums, you should at least be sure about what you are complaining about. Also, you could have written the reviewer a private message asking what they meant. Just sayin....
02/04/2010
Contributor: Sassybunny85 Sassybunny85
Quote:
Originally posted by Maiden
Oh, don't get me wrong, the writing was confusing. I just thought people should know that she wasn't saying to clean toys with Febreze. It is an interesting topic... worst sex advice given. That being said, if you are gonna call some one out ... more
I just said that got my mind churning. I didn't say it was the worst advice.
02/11/2010
Contributor: fuck.puppet fuck.puppet
this isn't toy advice,exactly. I can't remember where i heard this but, i remember someone suggesting using plastic wrap and tape as a condom. seriously...
03/31/2010