Breaking your masturbation habits!

Breaking your masturbation habits!

Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
I have an issue: ever since I was a little girl, I always masturbated with my clothes, on my stomach, hand between panties and jeans, pressing hard. Of course, I didn't realize it was masturbation until I hit middle school, but it gives you a frame of reference as to how long I've been doing this.

Until I went to college, I never even tried masturbating any other way. It just never occurred to me! So we're talking at LEAST 15 years of me doing the same thing every time.

Here's the issue: I still prefer to be on my stomach with pressure when I masturbate. At least 90% of the time, without even thinking about it, I will flip on to my stomach and finish up that way. It's frustrating, because I feel like I'm really limiting myself, but I am DEFINITELY a creature of habit and routine (OCD), so it's tough for me to break out.

What I'm really asking is this: I always hear people say, "You'll get acclimated to masturbating one way and you'll have to fix it," but they never say how to fix it!!!
09/26/2008
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Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
^ Also, I should add that this also kind of alters my sex life with my partners: I get rather annoyed if, say, I'm in missionary with a man and he's not putting a lot of weight on me, or if I'm performing oral on a woman while I'm lying on my back.
09/26/2008
Innocently Masturbating Innocently Masturbating
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I have an issue: ever since I was a little girl, I always masturbated with my clothes, on my stomach, hand between panties and jeans, pressing hard. Of course, I didn't realize it was masturbation until I hit middle school, but it gives you a ...
Wow. I've had a rather similar experience, except it never even occurred to be to touch my genitals. I simply humped stuff. Only in the last few years have messed around with my vagina.

I still find my self humping a hard carpet floor at times (ZOMGTMI!). Oddly, I enjoy pressing my clitoral area on the floor/bed really hard. I can't imagine that's healthy, but it's satisfies me for some reason.

I think, simply, you just have to keep practicing alternative ways of masturbation. Even if you don't get off, try manual stimulation. So, basically, I'm no help at all. You're not alone, though.
09/26/2008
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
I was also of the humping school of masturbating. I think you just need to try it other ways until you find something else that works for you, too. Practice makes perfect. Truthfully, when I masturbate with toys I tend to do more grinding than thrusting or relying on vibrators, maybe that helps?
09/26/2008
Spiking Glue Spiking Glue
I love my fingers. I don't get why -- it's not as romantic and as slow, or sensuous, or 'self love' as some people write it is, for me, but I love it. For me, it's my 'get it done!' move. So, for me, anything involving sex toys or other people is a huge step beyond my boundries.

My whole experiment is Eden-wide. I didn't much care for toys when I started here, but I was curious about them. Slowly, after much unfortunate money spendage, and trial, and error, I figured out a way to get off that did not simply involve rubbing myself off several times a day.

I don't know, for me, my battle plan was "try everything!" :/ enjoy some. I had to spend big bucks to figure out what worked, for me. I'm envious of people who don't have to spend hundreds of dollars to figure out what makes them come. It's just so..... *frugal*.
09/26/2008
Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
I just wish I could make myself stop doing it without realizing it. Toys are great, and I can get off with them, but a lot of the time, I will stop RIGHT before my orgasm, flip over, and do it the old fashioned way. I might try throwing a sheet on the floor and trying that, or sitting in a chair, because I don't want to get too acclimated to the bed, either!
09/26/2008
Beautiful Dreamer Beautiful Dreamer
Quote:
Originally posted by Spiking Glue
I love my fingers. I don't get why -- it's not as romantic and as slow, or sensuous, or 'self love' as some people write it is, for me, but I love it. For me, it's my 'get it done!' move. So, for me, anything involving sex ...
I use my hands as well. I know what works. I know what works fast. I still haven't found my perfect sex toy. I am also quickly discovering I really don't like (only) penetration with sex toys.....
09/26/2008
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I just wish I could make myself stop doing it without realizing it. Toys are great, and I can get off with them, but a lot of the time, I will stop RIGHT before my orgasm, flip over, and do it the old fashioned way. I might try throwing a sheet on ...
Trying to change behaviour that you don't realize can be very difficult. All I can do is wish you luck. You'll have to try to reprogram your habits, so to speak.

But, there is nothing wrong with how you masturbate.
09/26/2008
AnalArtist AnalArtist
If you got a pair of handcuffs, try cuffing one arm to the bed. That way you can't flip over. At less for me, I kind of discover that I masturbate the same way. With toys I'll try new stuff but well being a guy, not a whole lot of options haha
09/28/2008
Profane Profane
Quote:
Originally posted by Beautiful Dreamer
I use my hands as well. I know what works. I know what works fast. I still haven't found my perfect sex toy. I am also quickly discovering I really don't like (only) penetration with sex toys.....
I don't either. It's extremely rare for me to be able to 'finish' without some other kind of stimulation. And half the time then, I feel like it wasn't half as powerful.

I've gone from exactly Backseat talks about to being able to find just about any kind of way, as long as its physically comfortable. Biggest issue was first *getting* comfortable, then figuring out how to get the right amount of pressure/friction that my old way gave me. It may be why you still do it. For you, pressure may be a big issue in being able to orgasm. Some women don't like pressure at all, or are too sensitive for vibrators. (Think of it like men do - everyone has a stroke.)

Try laying on your back with your legs squeezed together, or with one leg flat/to the side and the other leaning inwards to put pressure on your hand.
04/22/2009
Rockin' Rockin'
It took me a little while to get used to other positions. I usually lie on my back and play with my hands between my legs, legs apart. For me, sitting upright in a desk chair was a weird position at first, but I've learned to do it that way, too. Can't flip over onto your stomach in a chair, I hope.

Like Profane said, the biggest issue was getting comfortable for me, but my method of stimulation would change with position. I don't feel like I touch myself with the same pressure/frequency when I'm on my back as I do when I masturbate in a doggie/downward position.
04/22/2009
Liz2 Liz2
I have changed positions and technique since my early teen years. For awhile it was always on my back, in bed. The doggie position came after I started having sex. Now, so many times in my desk chair watching a porn clip. Toys have contributed so much to me being satisfied, so position and toys are both considered. With a dil in the shower, standing is awesome for me!
04/22/2009
Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
My favorite way of masturbation since I was pretty darn young: towel or blanket pulled up taught between my legs and grinding on it. It works for me and it's still how I do it when I don't feel like reaching for a toy. My mom caught me a few times and asked me what the hell I thought I was doing. I played dumb each time. "Huh? What?"
04/22/2009
Naughty Student Naughty Student
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz2
I have changed positions and technique since my early teen years. For awhile it was always on my back, in bed. The doggie position came after I started having sex. Now, so many times in my desk chair watching a porn clip. Toys have contributed so ...
One day I will learn to cum standing, so far hasn't happenned. It must be hard to stay up
05/12/2009
Nickisonehere Nickisonehere
Have you seen a clockwork orange? Maybe you could fix it like that?

As others have said, try sitting in a chair or the bathtub, something like that, and don't think about the 'flipping over' concern at all while you're going at it.

Also, until you can finish yourself off in another position, don't masturbate while in your bed or anywhere where there's a possibility of flipping over. That sounds hard maybe lol
05/12/2009
giggled giggled
Ha, clockwork orange.

As far as I can tell, if you're able to climax that way, what's the problem? Don't fix it if it ain't broken. That said, I've always found it easier and more comfortable to come on my stomach as well (I get better g-spot stimulation that way).

A great way to experiment and try other positions is as other posters have suggested - restraining yourself with handcuffs or just a ribbon tying your wrist or thigh to something. If you're experimenting with toys, you can get a similar angle and pressure by sitting with the toy inside you or against your clit while wearing underwear and sitting up or gently reclined.

If you're going solo, what really matters is your pleasure and what works for you. Who cares if your positions are boring? If you're climaxing, that's what counts. If and when you mix it up and bring other people into the mix, try some restraints and let them get you off. If you do wind up masturbating in front of them, trust me, they will not be disappointed with your "unconventional" technique
05/20/2009
ordinaryak ordinaryak
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I have an issue: ever since I was a little girl, I always masturbated with my clothes, on my stomach, hand between panties and jeans, pressing hard. Of course, I didn't realize it was masturbation until I hit middle school, but it gives you a ...
What i have found with me is if ido the same thing (orgasm the same way,in the same position) about 3 or 4 times in a row(differant days) then that will be the easiest way for me to orgasm. me and my boyfriends sex will go and has done ever since we started having sex one day ill feel like i want doggy style then the next time we have sex ill want it again,and again and again and that will be our main position for a few weeks sometiems a month and if i try cuming in another position it will take me twice as long untill one day my body will feel like women on top and then again and again untill its hard to cum any other way. and even if i go home and masterbate ill try to get into those positions by myself. but my body has always switched what it wanted after a while. maybe you should try forcing yourself to cum in another position for a few weeks and see what happens?
03/04/2010
Jade Jade
I was the same way. Now I can use toys in different postions to get off. I just worked on it until I could do it in a different way. But I wouldn't worry about it, I mean if you get all tense and freaked out it's not going to help.
03/17/2010
thordora thordora
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I have an issue: ever since I was a little girl, I always masturbated with my clothes, on my stomach, hand between panties and jeans, pressing hard. Of course, I didn't realize it was masturbation until I hit middle school, but it gives you a ...
oh man, I could have written this. I'm trying to break it, but I don't always have that much patience! I'm finding that using toys helps sometimes, but it's the pressure thing. I don't know if it's something to fix so much as just work with. If I can't get off any other way, I'll roll over and take care of things. Thankfully most partners seem amused, and they really do try their best.
04/03/2010
Sera Sera
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I just wish I could make myself stop doing it without realizing it. Toys are great, and I can get off with them, but a lot of the time, I will stop RIGHT before my orgasm, flip over, and do it the old fashioned way. I might try throwing a sheet on ...
Haha. Hey, it's whatever works for you. If you want to change, then you will.
08/15/2010
TheCleansing TheCleansing
You really just have to remind yourself that a new way may feel better.
08/27/2010
mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
ive been masterbaing the same way for years...ive tried other ways but it just takes too long. most of the time i just do it just to cum, so i do what i know is gannawork faster.
09/19/2010
Total posts: 22
Unique posters: 19