Dr. Joel anal screw - probe by Cal Exotics - review by Kindred

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Dr. Joel Should Screw Himself First

Are you new to anal play and looking for a good first choice for a toy? Well, keep looking because the Dr. Joel Anal Screw doesn't fit any of the usual criteria I recommend for beginners. It's made of a porous material, it's too short to manipulate properly when fully inserted, and it relies on a poorly designed retrieval cord rather than a flared base for safety.
Modest size,
It's black,
Can juice a lemon
Porous material,
Too short to grip securely
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review


The Dr. Joel anal screw is an anal probe manufactured by California Exotic Novelties. The probe is designed to be thrust or screwed and has a raised screw pattern to provide additional stimulation. The probe does not have a flared base typical of most anal safe toys but instead has a retrieval cord should the toy accidentally slip completely in. The modest size of the toy might appeal to individuals new to anal play as more experienced users will probably be left wanting more.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Anal

Material / Texture

The Anal Screw is made of black, phthalate free Pvc with a glossy finish. The toy consists of a thin tube of Pvc that is flexible and filled with a material that is compressible and gives some firmness to the toy's shape. At the base of the toy is a hard plastic ball that is attached to the open end of the tube. The retrieval cord is threaded through a hole in this ball. The ball appears to be well attached as I was unable to dislodge it with a strong tug. The retrieval cord is made of a thin, braided cord. The toy does have a plastic smell typical of Pvc, but it is not overly strong and is only noticeable when I put my nose right up to it.
    • Light odor
    • Porous

Design / Shape / Size

The Anal Screw has basically a tubular shape that is approximately 6" in length, has a diameter of 1-1/4", and a circumference of 3-3/4". The product page lists the length as 12" which is misleading because that includes the retrieval cord. I would say this toy has at most an insertable length of 5" which leaves only 1" to manipulate the toy. Handling of the toy becomes even more challenging once any lube gets on the end. The surface of the toy has a corkscrew pattern that extends the entire length. It somewhat resembles a large drill bit with a 1/2" thread. The threads are less than an 1/8" high and are designed to provide stimulation as the toy is thrust or screwed. Although the toy does not have a flared base, the retrieval cord is designed as a safety measure should the toy slip in entirely.

The size would probably only appeal to novices to anal play. Those with experience will probably be disappointed. The relatively small size would make this toy suitable for travel. Personally, I do not think that it looks like an obvious anal toy without prior knowledge. It honestly looks like a small baton with the retrieval cord as a wrist strap.
    • Beginner


With a modest 1-1/4" diameter, you'd think the Anal Screw would be easy to insert. However, the tip has barely any taper at all and is actually rather blunt. This does not facilitate the probe to slide in easily. Secondly, the flexibility of the toy makes it difficult to apply direct pressure to guide it in. Instead, the toy has a tendency to bend slightly and veer off course. Once past the anus, the probe was easy to fully insert. The picture on the product page is slightly deceptive to me as the threads are not nearly as prominent as they appear. Additionally, the flexibility of the material made it so that the threads were not noticeable at all to me whether the toy was thrust or screwed.

Care and Maintenance

Pvc is a porous material and so can not be completely sterilized. Cleaning can be accomplished by either using a toy cleaner or washing in warm water while using an antibacterial soap. Be sure to carefully clean the retrieval cord as well since the braided texture easily traps dirt and will wick up fluids and lubricant. Pvc is compatible with both water based and silicone lubes (oil based lubes may cause deterioration of the material). I would recommend using a condom with this toy but especially so if you plan to share it. Avoid contact with other toys since this may cause an unwanted reaction. I would store it in a Ziploc bag if I actually planned to keep it.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store


The Anal Screw comes packaged in a typical plastic clam shell. The package clearly states that the product is an anal screw and so is not discreet at all. There are no directions included, but the package identifies the toy as a spiral probe. The front has a picture of snow covered mountains with a cloudy sky. Perhaps Dr. Joel discovered the Anal Screw while hiking in the Himalayas? The best feature is that the plastic is minimal and recyclable.
    • Minimal
    • Not discreet
    • Recyclable

Personal comments

I was torn as to what to rate this toy and ultimately decided to give it 2 stars. My rating is based on the fact that it is relatively inexpensive ($16 at manufacturer's website) and has a modest size. The size is a little bit larger than a finger and so may help transition someone to a larger toy. Otherwise, I can't find much good to say about it. I can't say that I could really appreciate feeling the screw pattern when I used it. Also, the length made it difficult to grasp and use on myself. I found the easiest position was to lay on my side and have my arm reach around behind me. The Anal Screw provided some stimulation, but honestly a carrot in a condom would probably work just as well, if not better, because it's likely to be longer and easier to hold. I was especially uncomfortable with the retrieval cord. It made me nervous to be relying on the cord for safety which made it difficult to relax and enjoy myself. I'm concerned that with time, the ball that attaches the cord will become separated from the toy during use. Personally, I would prefer to rely on a flared base. Honestly, for just a little more money, there are much better choices available for beginners in terms of safer materials and better design.
Follow-up commentary
Since I had no intentions of using the Anal Screw again, I decided to sacrifice it in the name of toy science. As mentioned by Dwtim and illustrated in the photo below, the inside is filled with strips of thin cloth to provide support to the structure. Perhaps in a medical emergency, Dr. Joel could rip open his Anal Screw for bandages?
anal screw
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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  • Petite Valentine
    Sorry you didn't like the product. You deserve extra points for a great title!
  • SweetSaffron
    A fabric center? That sounds entirely ineffective.
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