Shimmer Lube YUCK Pack

There are so many lubes on edenfantasys worthy of attention. Why are you looking at THIS garbage? Take my advice, move on to the next product, this stuff is NOT what you want.
Absolutely nothing
Not slick enough and the taste is repugnant.
Rating by reviewer:
extremely useful review
I had high hopes for these. I have to say I picked this product based on their girly bottles. So cute, in small non-descript bottles. Christ, I could ACCESSORIZE with my lube! Shimmer and Sweet are two words a girl cannot resist, so I just had to buy this stuff. Actually, this item was one of the first purchases I made here at eden!

Most flavored lubes|Shimmer lube sweet pack™ inflame my nether parts and make sex uncomfortable, so I only enjoy them while performing oral sex on my partner. So the flavor is very important to me. So, let me make it clear that I can only attest to the product's flavor and basic consistency. I can't put it anywhere near my bits, so I cannot claim to know it's true lubrication abilities.

From my perspective, as someone just looking for taste, here is what I can say:

Juicy apple tastes like juicy CRAP. No hint of the apple-ly goodness I had hoped for. Just a bland, semi-sweet, YUCK taste. The kind that hangs around for a while. On your tongue. Yuck.

Boysenberry tastes like berry CRAP. Not that I can tell you exactly how a boysenberry is supposed to taste, I can assure you it does not taste like this.

Pink Champagne tasted guessed CRAP. It tasted like the strawberries and champagne spray from a mall retailer. Not so good.

Pina Colada was the only one that even semi-resembled it's namesake. However, it still tasted terrible compared to some of the other flavored lubes on the market.

The taste for all four resembled isopropyl alcohol mixed with tiny bits of bubble gum mixed with CRAP. The consistency was strange, almost too viscous. I prefer lube to be a little easy to spread around. This stuff seemed like it had been on the shelf too long.

I was so disappointed, I threw them right in the garbage.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by

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  • Contributor: Cock Wrangler
    Ha. Sorry they were so gross, but that was amusing. Doc Johnson lube, so I can't say I'm surprised.
  • Contributor: Luscious Lily
    Thanks for the warning!
  • Contributor: Snappy
  • Contributor: Epiphora
    Hahaha, this is probably the funniest review I've ever read.
  • Contributor: Miss Cinnamon
    HAHAHA--thank you for the late-night giggle! I can totally relate to the no-no to flavored things near my girl parts too. I remember the one time my boyfriend used a mint condom during intercourse--NOT pretty! I'm sorry that your experience with these shimmer lubes was so crappy... what were the colors like? Was the shimmer as crappy as the "sweet"?
  • Contributor: Betty Rocket
    Cinnamon - Not really shimmery, more like pearlessence. condoms are a no no for me too. :)
  • Contributor: yayy
  • Contributor: danellejohns
    Oh goodness, sorry you had such a bad experience. I am gonna say that your review has definately put a stop in anyone trying it. I am curious though if anyone else has tried this and had a totally different experience? I have seen it happen here before, but not sure I would be gutsy enough to tempt it.
  • Contributor: thedude
    glad i read this first
  • Contributor: ninaspinkturtle
  • Contributor: tami
    thanks for the warning
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